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God created watermelons, and then created humans to eat them. For a long time we did not have tools we could use to cut watermelons into many small pieces, so god gave us 2 nostrils so that we could still breathe, without having to stop eating, when the first nostril got clogged up with watermelon.
 

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First of all, Tom Cruise created all of us in His divine image.

Secondly........watermelon is gross.
 

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I remember seeing this movie where this guy had sex with a heated watermelon offscreen. I forgot what it was called though.
 

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Scorpius View Post

First of all, Tom Cruise created all of us in His divine image.

Secondly........watermelon is gross.
Well, yeah, the ones with the seeds are gross. But seedless watermelons are awesome.

We have two nostrils because when you get sick, one always gets clogged up.
 

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Or so we don't suffocate while picking our noses.
 

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Snowcone View Post

I remember seeing this movie where this guy had sex with a heated watermelon offscreen. I forgot what it was called though.
Could you do a little research and get back to us?
 

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We hear, see, and smell in stereo. True fact. If you smell something, can't you tell where it is coming from? It is a good survival skill.

Here's a test. snort enough meth that your septum erodes away. I bet you don't survive as long as the control sample.
 

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Quote:
Originally Posted by sleepydvdr View Post

Well, yeah, the ones with the seeds are gross. But seedless watermelons are awesome.

We have two nostrils because when you get sick, one always gets clogged up.
you better watch out. monsanto is big into producing seedless watermelons. do you smell a conspiracy here?
 

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Oral pleasures. This is why.
 

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Quote:
Originally Posted by SomebodyElse View Post

No, we have two nostrils so that we can still breathe with one when we stick a jellybean up the other.
Well, this makes the most sense, but I would have said crayon, not jellybean.

Actually if we have a nosebleed from one side, we can stick a tissue up that side and still breathe from the other side. Sort of.
 
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