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Which of the following do you think you could handle the best?

  • Have 6 months left to live.

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • Being permanently paralyzed from the waist down.

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • Having a conjoined twin, with no possibility of separation.

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • Being a midget.

    Votes: 0 0.0%
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I didn't answer because I'm a healthy person who's not any of these things. And while I can empathize with a person who is in such a situation, I don't know how it feels, and I think to post saying which one is the 'better' choice is to make light of these very serious circumstances. Wouldn't you say?<br><br><br><br>
mho.<br><br>
B
 

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On the other hand, reading through this discussion has given me lots to think about. Thanks portucula (sp?).<br><br><br><br>
B
 

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I picked paralyzed from the waist down. I've thought about this sort of thing before. It would be dreadful, of course, but most of the activities that I enjoy the most are things done with my hands and eyes: reading, writing, cooking, various types of art, gardening ... Even though it would be a major crink in my life, I would still be able to enjoy those things.
 

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<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block"><i>Originally posted by Portulaca</i><br><br><b>Gimp, cripple, disabled, differently-abled, handicapped, height challenged, midget, short person, little person. They are all just words . . . . It doesn't matter what word is used. It only matters how it is used. I think the whole pc thing is really silly.<br><br></b></div>
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Portalaca, I love your attitude. On the above point and on many others. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/smiley.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=":)"><br><br><br><br>
A "stewardess" may become a "flight attendant," a "waitress" may become a "server," a "black" person may become an "African American" one. A "secretary" is now an "assistant." Heck, you can turn "women" into "womyn" if you want. Even Hollywood "actresses" (poor things) must now be called by the gender-neutral "actor."<br><br><br><br>
But attitudes are what count, not strings of letters.<br><br><br><br>
I think the habit of constantly changing the names of certain groups which are -- in some quarters, anyway -- perceived negatively only reinforces the idea that that group needs a little extra help, some sympathetic faux-respect. It is condescending, in my view.<br><br><br><br>
Geez, if people are going to take the word thing so seriously, then I'd rather be a "waitress" (I am waiting upon you) than a "server" (same derivation as "servant"). Speaking as someone with a bit of experience waiting tables.<br><br><br><br>
Sorry for the off-topic slant; this has been a rant of mine for years. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/rolleyes.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=":rolleyes:">
 

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i picked midget. i'm already very short, i wouldn't mind being a few inches shorter. i've known little people.. they seemed pretty happy and they had very fulfilling lives.<br><br><br><br>
i'm also surprised at the number of people who would rather die. when i first read that option i thought, who on earth would rather have 6 months to live??<br><br><br><br>
well, i would never prefer to die. life's been treating me good, i guess.. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/smiley.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=":)"> i wouldn't want to be paralyzed, because i woudn't want to not be able to walk or run or swim or climb stairs, and i really wouldn't want to be a conjoined twin, because i'd go crazy if i didn't have my alone-time.
 

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I certainly wouldn't mind being a midget, as epinephrine says, I'm already short, and like being short, and I would love to be one of the "little people". Possibly my obsession with fantasy leads me to this.<br><br><br><br>
portulaca, interesting about sex. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/wink3.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=";)"> Makes me feel better about it! But I'm also one who likes my hikes...<br><br><br><br>
Your story reminds me of my aunt. Another drink driver tragedy. My grandmother and her three daughters (aged early teens) were in a taxi late at night and a drunk driver hit them. My grandmother died, I never knew her. Two of my aunts were injured badly but they were injuries they recovered from. My other aunt (the youngest) was paralysed. She's a quadriplegic. Life is very hard for her, and worse is the fact that some family members took advantage of her compensation (that was supposed to help her adjust). They never paid her back. Just plain wrong... thank you for sharing.
 

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<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block"><i>Originally posted by Portulaca</i><br><br><b><br><br>
Then, the next morning, I was at the grocery store and there was a midget there. I've never known a midget, but they always look unhappy to me. It also seems like they are always alone. Here I was with my beautiful, "normal" daughter, and there he was all by himself. I also noticed that people were gawking at him even more than they gawk at me. So then I started to wonder what it would be like to be a midget. Which lead me to the question I asked here.</b></div>
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i have a question if, it's ok. i've been wondering about it for a while. whenever i see a disabled person or a midget, i usually smile at them. not a pity smile, just a friendly smile. i always feel like people who are avoided or stared at all the time might appreciate a friendly face now and then, someone who's not too nervous around them to look them in the eye and acknowledge them.<br><br><br><br>
now.. what i wonder is, if someone walking past you smiled at you for no reason like that, would you take it as an insult, like that the person is pitying you or giving you special attention or something? or do you appreciate the gesture and understand that they're just being friendly because not many other people are?<br><br>
i've just always done it out of habit and just thought recently, what if it's insulting to some people, what if they don't understand the intention behind it etc.<br><br>
i don't want to come off condascending, but i don't want to be one of those people who averts their eyes when they pass someone who obviously stands out in a crowd.
 

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<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block"><i>Originally posted by Epinephrine</i><br><br><b><br><br>
i'm also surprised at the number of people who would rather die. when i first read that option i thought, who on earth would rather have 6 months to live??</b></div>
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i thought the same thing. personally, i know it's better to live with a disability than to not live at all.<br><br>
and really, i believe that the reason some people are disabled is because it's what's meant to be, and they're learning their life lessons. best thing you can do is learn to live as best you can with or in spite of a disability and accept that as your life. everyone has their own problems to overcome, some people have financial problems some people have love life problems, some people can't walk. it's all the same.<br><br><br><br>
and yet some people throw the word suicide around. not everyone thinks life is precious i guess <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/huh.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=":confused:">
 

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The question was:<br><br><br><br><b>Which of the following <span style="text-decoration:underline;">do you think you could handle</span> the best?</b><br><br><br><br>
Not which one is best, but which one could I handle?<br><br><br><br>
I picked near-term death because we all have to die, I've watched and tried to help my parents through their final illnesses. I've also been the Executor of their respective estates. So I think I could cope with this one better than the others. Moreover, I need to write down for my sister what she needs to do in the event of my death anyway. Death is inevitable and we all need to get our affairs in order as much as possible, unless we want to add to the problems of our surviving families.<br><br><br><br>
I know nothing about being paralyzed, being joined to a twin or being a midget, so I have no idea how I would "handle" any of those situations.<br><br><br><br>
I don't have any friends or acquaintances in those situations, nor have I ever been exposed to people in those situations, so I have no basis for understanding what those situations would be like.<br><br><br><br>
Come to think of it, I don't think I've even read a fiction or non-fiction story about a person suddenly "waking up" as a midget or a conjoined twin--not even a "Twilight Zone" episode--so I really cannot imagine what that would be like.<br><br><br><br>
I think it is really twisting the discussion to say that the poll means it is better to be dead than in a wheelchair, or that people are voting that way, etc. That wasn't the question that was asked.
 

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fair enough.<br><br>
all i meant was, if i was in a horrible accident and woke up to a doctor telling me i'd never walk again, the first thing i'd think would probably be "at least i survived!"<br><br>
and a friend's cousin was recently in such a bad accident that everyone's amazed she survived. she may not make it and took a turn for the worst today and the family is so stressed out with not knowing if she'll be ok or not. if she survives but is paralyzed her family will just be happy she's alive. if she doesn't make it, it may be easier on her but not on the family.<br><br><br><br>
i dunno, i wouldn't want to put my family through that, being glad i survived but then on eggshells not knowing if i'd recover, and then not make it.<br><br><br><br>
traumatic either way. i guess that's partly why i chose midget, nothing sudden and traumatic about it, it's how you're born and it's what you're used to from the start. likewise if you were born unable to walk though i guess.<br><br><br><br>
i don't know, my head hurts <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/wink3.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=";)">
 

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Discussion Starter · #51 ·
<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block"><i>Originally posted by LadyFaile</i><br><br><b>inow.. what i wonder is, if someone walking past you smiled at you for no reason like that, would you take it as an insult, like that the person is pitying you or giving you special attention or something? or do you appreciate the gesture and understand that they're just being friendly because not many other people are?</b></div>
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I appreciate the gesture. Of course, someone else in a chair might feel totally different. I'm not insulted though. Sometimes, and not very often, I just don't feel like getting the smiles and/or hellos. When I'm in a crabby mood like that, I just don't make eye contact with anyone. I'm in total control of that. I know that wherever I go, I will get it if I want it. If I don't want it, I look at the ground which doesn't give anyone the opportunity.<br><br><br><br>
Shewolf, that's too bad about your aunt. I think being a quad is a completely different story. My independence is so important to me. If given the choice between being a midget or a quad, I think I'd pick midget. And then relatives took advantage of her money? That's horrible. Living with a disability, especially for quads, is so expensive.<br><br><br><br>
Thanks Sunnyk! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/smiley.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=":)"> BTW, I received your PM and I responded, but I'm not sure it was sent. I could have very well clicked on Clear or Delete instead of Send. I hope you got it.
 

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I really wasn't frightened by any of these choices, except that dying in 6 months would leave my 5 year old daughter motherless. That is the scariest part.<br><br><br><br>
I've always felt that I could handle whatever path my life followed, and that I could find a way to do more than just "make the best of it", but to live a life that felt good for my soul.<br><br><br><br>
For me, all of the experiences mention are just, well, experiences. Only experiences. I have a hard time saying that one experience is "better" or "worse", just as I have a hard time deciding whether "black" is better than "white", or "hot" is better than "cold". We live in the world of the relative, and all experiences are defined by life around them. No matter how beautiful our bodies are, someone will be more beautiful. No matter how limited we are, there is someone who will be more limited.<br><br><br><br>
I am not always able to live as I believe in these things, but as I get older, I am more aware that any given situation is simply an experience to be......well.....experienced. I work in my own life to appreciate all things as fully as I can... whether or not they are the "ying" or the "yang".
 

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portulaca, some of my relatives are the sort that I have nothing to do with (basically disowned them)... stealing money from a quadriplegic relative is not the worst thing some of them have done... but I'm not going into that here...
 

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<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block"><i>Originally posted by Portulaca</i><br><br><b>I appreciate the gesture. Of course, someone else in a chair might feel totally different. I'm not insulted though. Sometimes, and not very often, I just don't feel like getting the smiles and/or hellos. When I'm in a crabby mood like that, I just don't make eye contact with anyone. I'm in total control of that. I know that wherever I go, I will get it if I want it. If I don't want it, I look at the ground which doesn't give anyone the opportunity.</b></div>
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gotcha. thanks for answering<br><br><br><br>
i agree that it'd be much harder being paralyzed from the neck down as opposed to waist down, but also for other conditions where the body can't do what it's supposed to. i knew a girl in school who had very little use of her hands, no use of her legs, and couldn't speak. she could feed herself but needed help opening containers. a bunch of us used to eat lunch at the same table every day and she'd join us and we'd take turns helping her out. she had a nifty laptop computer that she used to communicate, took a while because she could only type with one finger. but she was really smart and once wrote something about how frustrating it was that other kids thought she was stupid because of her disability when her mind was really as sharp as anyone else's... a teacher read it over the intercomm one morning. i can't imagine what that'd be like, more or less trapped inside your own body. scary thought. she was always smiling though and it was really easy to get a laugh out of her <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/wink3.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=";)">
 

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I actually picked conjoined twins. I'm a twin, and always liked being with my sister the best out of anyone, so being hooked up at the shoulder wouldn't be so bad. You'd be used to it from the day you were born, and the two of you would be so unique-- how many conjoined twins are out there? Not many. I agree that bathroom and sex stuff would be sorta odd, but you wouldn't know any different.<br><br><br><br>
I feel bad for those Iranian twins who were joined at the head and died from the surgery to separate them. They shoulda just stuck it out for their life.<br><br><br><br>
Chang and Ang--the first "Siamese" twins were joined at the hip and both got married and had several children each. They spent time at each others' houses equally and had a great life.
 
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