[jeezycreezy]

A couple years back I did a Secret Santa with a bunch of friends. We used to do it every year, and every year there was a theme. It was a bar theme on the night in question. And bear in mind, I'm known as a guy who loves beer and expresses his love more often than is good for him.

So that night while people opened bottles of wine, various spirits, Homer beer openers, fancy corkscrews, selections of fine imported lagers, I was getting very excited at the prospect of my gift.

Surely it would be beer.

Or a nice set of beer glasses like the kind I bought for Keith.

Surely it would be something beer related.

My turn came at last.

I unwrap my present.

And what should I find...

A plain clear glass cookie jar, cookie cutters shaped like Christmas trees from the dollar store, and some cookie dough in a tube like you get in the refrigerator section at the supermarket.

W.

T.

F???

Man did I put on an Academy® Award© winning performance that night. "You shouldn't have," is what I remember saying. So, yeah. That was lame.

So what's your worst gift?

 

[jeezycreezy]

Also: Anything Star Trek.

I like Star Wars people. Not Star Trek. There's a huge difference between the two that seems to have been lost on many a gift-giver throughout my life.

 

[Skylark]

I have blocked it out of my memory.

 

[ElliottsMom]

my grandmother thinks I'm really fat, two years ago she bought me a dress that could fit three of me inside it. not only was it gigantic, it was ugly as sin, some kind of faux suede material with giraffes all over it

. I tried it on and she said "wow I guess you lost some weight" I almost cried.

however, I was giddy with laughter when my sister opened her gift from my grandma, pleather hoochie shorts and a matching bra top.

 

[Skylark]

Quote:

Originally Posted by ElliottsMom

my grandmother thinks I'm really fat, two years ago she bought me a dress that could fit three of me inside it. not only was it gigantic, it was ugly as sin, some kind of faux suede material with giraffes all over it

. I tried it on and she said "wow I guess you lost some weight" I almost cried.

however, I was giddy with laughter when my sister opened her gift from my grandma, pleather hoochie shorts and a matching bra top.

I never trust anyone else to clothes-shop for me. My family asks for wish lists, and I usually put specific books, music, housewares and DVDs on it.

 

[peace]

My mother has a friend who is notorious for re-gifting. One year she gave me a cheapo plastic ornament of the type found in dollar stores or Big Lots...and that was it.

The next year her gift consisted of the EXACT SAME ORNAMENT.

I didn't have the guts to point it out, but my mom mercifully reminded her that last year she had gotten me the same thing. She claimed she didn't remember.

One of my relatives once gave my grandparents a dishwasher magnet that said CLEAN/DIRTY for Christmas.

 

[Skylark]

Quote:

Originally Posted by peace

One of my relatives once gave my grandparents a dishwasher magnet that said CLEAN/DIRTY for Christmas.

They should post that on their bedroom door when... you know.

This isn't a bad-gift story exactly. My aunt couldn't remember whether she'd given me the book "The Velveteen Rabbit" when I was in elementary school. For three consecutive gift-giving holidays (Christmas, birthday, and Christmas again) she gave me a copy of it, not realizing she already had. It's become such a big joke in our family she'll buy used copies of "The Velveteen Rabbit" and give them to me as a gag gift before she gives me the real one.

I think I have five copies on my shelf. It's great!

 

[rabid_child]

Appendicitis. 2 surgeries, 9 days in hospital.

Beat THAT.

 

[Skylark]

Quote:

Originally Posted by rabid_child

Appendicitis. 2 surgeries, 9 days in hospital.

Beat THAT.

That's the gift you give yourself that just keeps on giving.

 

[Amy SF]

I don't think this is, in essence, a crummy gift, and it may have been for my birthday, actually, but I remember one time I was at my parents' dinner table, yammering on about how much I really liked Cecilia Bartoli (an opera singer), how I had recently bought a certain CD of hers (can't remember which one at the moment) and how much I was enjoying it.

Came my birthday, or Chanuka, whichever it was. I opened the gift from my parents rather excitedly, because they always find really nice things for me, and it was the exact same CD I was talking about at their dinner table!

I was kinda mad for a while. Were they even listening when I was talking?

 

[~Wonder]

It's not Xmas, but for my 17th birthday my mother threw me a surprise birthday party at our local Pizza Slut. The party was nice and everything, although my friends were cheap and their presents consisted of a Garbage CD and a bag of M&Ms. But anyways, my mother's gift to me ended up being a suitcase wrapped in a giant black garbage bag. I know it's the though that counts, but really, who thinks "suitcase!"

Oh, ok, for Christmas, my grandfather, we call him Dziadzia (it means grandfather in Polish), ok, so every year he gives everyone an envelope with money in it. The envelope usually has our name misspelled on the front, mind you my name is very common and easy to spell. Anyways, so this one year he's handing out the envelopes and we all open them. My little cousin get $50, my mom gets $50 and my sister gets $100. I open mine up, and it's empty. Apparently he put my $50 in my sister's envelope by mistake. My bratty sister wouldn't hand over the 50 either.

That's all I can think of at the moment. But I've gotten tons and tons of tubesocks and underwear, a dollar store chess set, and more ugly clothes than a 2nd hand shop.

~Wondre

 

[thebelovedtree]

Once when I was little my dad and my mom got in a fight over who would get us on x-mas day. My mom ended up winning, so my dad didn't call and left us a basket of half eaten easter candy and a pink bunny candle on the washer for my sister and I to share. That even beats all the years he gave us nothing.

 

[Amy SF]

Quote:

Originally Posted by thebelovedtree

Once when I was little my dad and my mom got in a fight over who would get us on x-mas day. My mom ended up winning, so my dad didn't call and left us a basket of half eaten easter candy and a pink bunny candle on the washer for my sister and I to share. That even beats all the years he gave us nothing.

Quote:

Originally Posted by ~Wonder

at our local Pizza Slut

 

[rabid_child]

Quote:

Originally Posted by skylark

That's the gift you give yourself that just keeps on giving.

That's funny, because a year later and I STILL have abdominal pain from all the scar tissue!!

Some years ago I'd probably answer that my little sister was the worst gift, as she was born 12/26, but I like her ok now.

 

[Brandon]

My worst one, ever:

My lame-o stepbrother gave me a used copy of a DVD. I know it was used because it was the same one that my sister & brother-in-law had given him the previous year!!

Topping the crappy gift cake off, it also had a giant scratch on it which rendered it unplayable.

What a douchebag.

 

[Skylark]

Quote:

Originally Posted by ~Brandon

My worst one, ever:

My lame-o stepbrother gave me a used copy of a DVD. I know it was used because it was the same one that my sister & brother-in-law had given him the previous year!!

Topping the crappy gift cake off, it also had a giant scratch on it which rendered it unplayable.

What a douchebag.

I don't mind getting used DVDs when they're something I like. I buy used DVDs for myself, so why should I care as long as it works?

 

[Jessica Alana]

I bought my grandpa a used VHS Godfather box set. This was years ago, they didn't have a DVD player, and it was harder than hell to find it in VHS, and when I did, it was like $150-$200, so I paid like $75-$80 for the used (in good shape) set.

I can't remember any specific crummy gifts. Usually clothes. Do not ever buy me clothes. They will not EVER fit me. They will not be my style, either.

I know it's the thought that counts, so I think money will be best.

 

[meatless]

When I was 18 my boyfriend at the time gave me one of those "sheriff" sets with handcuffs and a badge that you buy at the dollar store. He gave it to me to open in front of his evangelical christian mother and extended family. It was great.

 

[GhostUser]

i got a 4 foot "santa butler". you know, it had a tray and remote control so it could serve drinks(if it worked, which it didn't). the carton was bashed in and obviously from a garage sale. it was the cheesiest crappiest tackiest thing i ever got from my ex's parents. his brother's wife got a gold bracelet, so i absolutly knew where i stood in that family.

i got them back though. i gave them a gift certificate to a vegan resturant the next year ( they eat meat with a side of meat )

 

[Brandon]

Quote:

Originally Posted by skylark

I don't mind getting used DVDs when they're something I like. I buy used DVDs for myself, so why should I care as long as it works?

Getting a used DVD from a store or something is one thing. Getting the same copy regifted to you in front of the people who gave it to him, and knowing that it was scratched to hell is a very different thing.