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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
<div style="text-align:center;"><span>if you were/are a vegetarian and are a guest at someones house who is not vegetarian?<br><br><br><br>
i just recently went to one of my friends house who is not a vegetarian and aside from constantly being reminded that being a vegetarian is unhealthy i almost felt like i was a constant bother. she did make meals that did have turkey in them and i tried to politly not eat them but what are you supposed to do in a situation like that whenever your friend knows that you dont eat meat?<br><br><br><br>
anyways any other stories or ideas of how to handle that sort of situation? <span style="font-family:'Comic Sans MS';">^-^</span></span></div>
 

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it sounds mostly like you did all you could. The best thing to do is just politely say no, and if they dont understand why you are not eating meat give them some reasons why you have became a veggie. Although there are some people that will just never understand, but thats their loss.
 

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sneeze on the whole table.
 

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Yeah, I get that when I go to relatives houses. Or even when I am at my parents house. Suchs as "There's chilli in the fridge. I only put a little beef in it."<br><br><br><br>
I just say, "No thanks." And leave it at that. It's always good to eat before going someplace.
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
<div style="text-align:center;"><span>that would be alot easier if i lived on my own lol. i remember one time my friends mom offered to make me vegetarian chili, but none this time =/</span></div>
 
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i always take my own food with me, under the guise of my 'not wanting to be a bother by expecting them to make special meals and cater for me'. its not too hard to arrange to take a few things with you, if you're staying somewhere, or even to go buy a few things from a store, if the people you're staying with don't have anything you like in the house.<br><br><br><br>
can you cook, even really basically? if you can, make a couple extra portions next time you make a tasty meal, and put the spares in the freezer, and you've got ready-meals that you can take and put in your hosts freezer when you go to visit. if you can't cook, and can't afford to buy posh stuff premade, then you can always put some salads and fruits and veggies and nuts and seeds and snacks, and a can of soup, etc in a bag, and take it with you. if this all fails, almost everyone'll have something veggie in the house (even if its just the ingredients for a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, or boiled potatoes with ketchup and frozen peas) so talk about what you can and can't have, and be brave and ask to make something, or ask to see what they've got thats suitable, before there is a problem.<br><br><br><br>
also, when you're there, you could ask (be really insistant!) to help with meals (to make things easier for them and you) and that way you could find out whats for dinner, and get bits of it separated out for you before they become meatified eg: if they're doing spagetti and meatballs, you could be right there in place to grab some spagetti and tomato sauce before the meatballs get thrown in there.<br><br><br><br>
be pro-active- look out for your needs. if people don't agree with what you're doing, if they think its silly, or if they don't understand what you will and won't eat, they're not going to do things in a way thats best for you- but you can do that for yourself, it just takes a little planning and some practice in 'looking after yourself'.<br><br><br><br>
i know it sometimes feels rude to say no to something, and that you can feel like you're being difficult by asking people choose to alter their routine for you, but you're not doing a bad thing by standing up for your needs. you can get away with a lot (and get your way, a lot) by being calm, friendly, helpful, and still not backing down, but instead stating your needs with a smile and with a keen desire to work together and resolve problems.
 

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Discussion Starter · #8 ·
<div style="text-align:center;"><span>thanks alot! i'll remember those things next time i go to a nonvegetarian house <span style="font-family:'Comic Sans MS';">^-^</span></span></div>
 

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when i am invited somewhere to eat,i tell them straight out that i am a vegetarian.<br><br><br><br>
i find that when i eat at someones house,they are respectful of my diet.
 

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<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>Blobbenstein</strong> <a href="/forum/post/0"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a><br><br>
sneeze on the whole table.</div>
</div>
<br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/laugh.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=":lol:"><br><br>
You, sir, are funny.<br><br>
~Wondre <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/biker.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=":ymca:">
 

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Entss and HCJ relate most of what I'd suggest, but here's something: in a situation like that I usually eat something before I go, enough that I won't go crazy if there isn't anything there I can eat but not enough that I can't have something if there is.<br><br><br><br>
I remember a Dear Abby letter some years ago where Abby blasted someone for responding to a dinner invitation by asking politely what was to be served, which seemed odd since you'd think she'd have awareness of eg. pork.
 

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<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>Elysia</strong> <a href="/forum/post/0"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a><br><br>
i just recently went to one of my friends house who is not a vegetarian and aside from constantly being reminded that being a vegetarian is unhealthy i almost felt like i was a constant bother.</div>
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<br><br><br>
I've found that if you have a friend that keeps forcing their misinformed opinion onto you about your diet, you really need to pull them up on it, else you'll have to take their crap every time you see them.
 

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I have learned to eat before I go to someone's house because once they find out I am not going to eat the main course they fixed all they give me is salad or like what was mentioned above, brought my own food. A lot of times they are glad someone else decided to bring some extra food. I have learned after just eating salad I needed to do something different because I was always starving. A lot of times people just do not realize all that we can eat.
 

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<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>Elysia</strong> <a href="/forum/post/0"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a><br><br><div style="text-align:center;"><span>if you were/are a vegetarian and are a guest at someones house who is not vegetarian?<br><br><br><br>
i just recently went to one of my friends house who is not a vegetarian and aside from constantly being reminded that being a vegetarian is unhealthy i almost felt like i was a constant bother. she did make meals that did have turkey in them and i tried to politly not eat them but what are you supposed to do in a situation like that whenever your friend knows that you dont eat meat?<br><br><br><br>
anyways any other stories or ideas of how to handle that sort of situation? <span style="font-family:'Comic Sans MS';">^-^</span></span></div>
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If you were a guest, you should not have been treated the way you were. She shouldn't have made you feel uncomfortable. She wouldn't serve pork to a Jewish guest, would she? If she invited you over again, say "No, thank you. You made my uncomfortable last time I was there." She can't argue with that.<br><br><br><br>
Whenever I go to another person's house for a meal, they have something vegetarian I can eat. My boyfriend's Mom, at the beginning, didn't understand much about vegetarianism. She would make soups with chicken broth that I'd have to say no to. Now, she's a pro (my bf and I have been together for 2 years). She even has a HUGE box of Boca burgers in her freezer just in case. Even my boyfriend's Mom's best friend makes sure she has veggie food for me at her house during the holidays. I don't ask people to go out of their way, but they do a little to support my decision. I would never expect anyone to cook a seperate meal for me. I'm fine with a vegetable and salad. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/smiley.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=":)"><br><br><br><br>
Politely refuse the non-veg meal next time. Always eat before you go somewhere (that's what I do).
 

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Most hosts go out of their way to make sure their guests are comfortable. At least all good hosts do.. My boyfriend's mom is not a very good/creative cook, but she has always made an effort to accomodate me. For a while, my bf and I had to remind her that things like butter, and cream of whatever soup, both contained dairy, and thus I wouldn't eat them. She's gotten much better now! She lets me know what she's put into things, and will generally just make pasta and marinara sauce if we're over, which is perfectly fine! She also asks me a million questions now about cooking and preparing veggies and stuff <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/smiley.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=":)"> It is my position that if my bf's Mom can throw together a vegan meal, so can anyone.
 

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Don't you eat fish? I thought you said you don't claim to be a vegetarian. Ask for them to prepare fish for you. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/thinking.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=":think:">
 

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Whenever possible, I'll check with the host/hostess ahead of time and offer to make/bring a fav veggie dish to dinner to share with the other diners. This way, I'm guaranteed that there is something for me to eat, and for me personally, it's a way to educate others that vegetarians eat more than just lettuce, carrots, etc. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/smiley.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=":)">
 

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my husband is an omnivore; i'm a vegetarian. my husband and i both eat more than 'normal people' (meaning more frequently), and because of this we often carry around a lot of our own food.<br><br><br><br>
we recently visited friends in pittsburgh. we stayed sat and sun nite, leaving monday (it was new years day). generally, speaking, i do not expect people to cook for me, so i asked before hand how many meals would be 'out' and how many 'in' so that i could prepare enough.<br><br><br><br>
they informed me that htey were making two vegetarian meals. i thought this was nice of them.<br><br><br><br>
even so, i still brought fruit, nuts, eggs (hard boiled), cheese slices (raw, organic, vegetarian), cut veggies (cauliflower, broccoli, carrots, celery, radishes, bell pepper strips), and bottled water (which i usually have in the car anyway). the drive was 5 hours up, and of course back, so i wanted to make sure i had enough for both trips. my husband brought meat loaf on top of what i brought (since we share veggies, fruit, nuts, etc).<br><br><br><br>
typically, i'll also bring a number of staples to cook for myself. thta's often veggie broth, my own noodles (kamut are my current fav!), perhaps some other veggies (depending upon what i want to make) and pre-cooked or sprouted beans.<br><br><br><br>
in most cases, it's no problem as long as they give me access to one burner. i strive to stick to single burner meals for myself. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/smiley.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=":)"><br><br><br><br>
this particular weekend, though, was a bit challenging. typically, friends have me cook one of the meals--so it's a nice, diverse, vegetarian meal. but at this friend's house, they insisted on cooking those two meals. here's what we had:<br><br><br><br>
1. pasta premavera--less than 1/2 cup of cut veggies each and about 3 cups of white pasta with pasta sauce (red). it was tastey, but had i made it, the ratio would have been flipped completely. i prefer veggies to pasta any day. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/smiley.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=":)"> i also might have used spaghetti squash rather than real pasta anyway!<br><br><br><br>
2. for dinner we had butternut squash stuffing (squash, bread chunks, onion and rosemary), roasted potatoes, black bean soup (canned--was basicly black beans and corn with spices), and 'pineapple salad' which is two rings of pineapple stuffed with walntus and cream cheese, with a cherry as a garnish.<br><br><br><br>
starch, starch and more starch. so, ti was pretty rough! LOL they noticed, after cooking and eating tht meal that it was starch heavy. so, i told them--next time just ask me and i'll send you some recipes. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/smiley.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=":)">
 

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I agree with what others have said. If she knew you were a vegetarian before she invited you, she should have accommodated you. No decent person invites someone for dinner and serves them something they know they don't eat.<br><br><br><br>
Whenever I invite someone to dinner, I ask "Are there things you don't eat?" and then usually follow up with "I was thinking of having -X-; will that be OK?" Most of my friends do the same.<br><br><br><br>
If this was a result of confusion/misunderstanding about what you eat, then just have a talk and clear it up.<br><br><br><br>
If it's a matter of her just choosing not to accomodate your diet, then decline further invitations.
 
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