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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Hey guys, so I'd like to get some opinions on something I've been driving myself crazy over lately. The girlfriend of one of my fiance's friends says shes vegetarian. However, she does things like, eat pepperoni pizza (just taking the pepperoni off), she eats vegetables that are cooked with meat, and Ive also seen her eat something that clearly has meat in it (chicken noodle soup..with chunks of chicken) and go, "oops, I didn't know there was meat"<br><br>
What makes me mad is that she goes around critisizing others on their own habits veg*n or omni, very harshly when she herself is not sticking to what she apperantly believes in, and I've had other omnis not take me as seriously because they see what she is doing.<br><br>
I personally think if you are going to label yourself as something and advocate it that you should be 100% for it, as to not give others a bad rap.<br><br>
I was just wondering how you guys would go about in a situation like this.. ive asked her and pointed out on numerous occasions that I dont agree with what she is doing, but she seems to just be in her own world.<br><br>
Thanks <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/smiley.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=":)">
 

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Honestly, I would just let it be. You have already voiced your opinion, and she knows how you feel. As annoying as some people can be, I don't believe that it is our job to change or control other people.
 

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Did you criticize the way she eats, or how she treats people - or both? Personally, I wouldn't have said anything about her eating habits. I <i>would</i> have said something about her trying to tell me what to do and how to live.<br><br>
I'd say let her eating habits go, however much they annoy you. If she nags at you or someone you care about, I'd pick some tactful but firm words telling her to step off. The way she eats isn't a violation of your rights. The way she lectures you (if you're one of her targets) is.
 

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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
Oops! Sorry, I should have been more clear about that part :p I haven't said anything to her about her eating habits, it just frustrates me.. but I know its not my job to change her, and I cant do so. I HAVE said things about her opinions of my eating habits though.
 

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I agree with smiling and YellowRose...it's annoying when people do stuff like that but best to just let it go. Same when my girlfriends say they are trying to eat healthier and want to lose weight but whenever we go out they order spinach and artichoke dip and fried crap. I just sit silently : )
 

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This girl is obviously the worst kind of "poser" and is probably acting this way to cover for her own low self esteem and feelings of inadequacy. I would just ignore her behavior and try to avoid situations where she is present if possible. When she does get on your case; change the subject, politely turn away and start talking to someone else, or walk away. Continue to be a good example of what a veg*n is and maybe she will eventually get the message. As the saying goes, "Actions speak louder than words."
 

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Is she a very recent vegetarian? She may still have an omni mindset with things like the pizza. When I went to my grandparents' the first time after going vegan from being an omni, they bought all these pizzas with pepperoni, sausage, etc. on it, and just expected me to take them off. When I said, "I'll just make a peanut butter sandwich instead", they got mad and said I was being picky and that I had to eat it, it wasn't until I told them I don't eat cheese because I didn't just become lacto ovo veg, I became vegan, that they backed off. So maybe your friend just hasn't researched vegetarianism much.<br><br><br>
With things like the soup and such, if she's a new veg, maybe she's just calling herself veg already and posing like she is one, but she's actually still transitioning off of meat. Either way, though, it's messed up that she would pose like that and criticize others. I wouldn't tell her anything, personally. It's not going to help at all, just continue setting a good example of veg*nism around her, like cienerose said. If you say something, she may use it as an excuse to say veg*ns are preachy and rude or whatever other stereotypes people have. Maybe you can invite your fience's friends and they're girlfriends all over for dinner one day and make a good common veg*n meal, to show her that all these common things are vegetarian without her having to eat meat. You could make it casual and do something like a movie night or watch a sports game and order cheese pizza for her so she doesn't have to take off meat, or make it more formal with commonly veg things. Maybe make a good simple noodle soup with vegetable broth so she realizes she doesn't need to eat chicken soups. Or you could make other good common soups like minestrone. Or you could mix and match other common veg*n sides and entrees like mashed potatoes, spaghetti, fried rice, gourmet mac and cheese, any other common already veg*n foods you can think of and just match them together so it's not obvious that they're just random veggie dishes, because right now I can't think of dishes related to each other. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/tongue3.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=":p">
 

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<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>cienerose</strong> <a href="/forum/post/2955932"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a><br><br>
This girl is obviously the worst kind of "poser" and is probably acting this way to cover for her own low self esteem and feelings of inadequacy. I would just ignore her behavior and try to avoid situations where she is present if possible. When she does get on your case; change the subject, politely turn away and start talking to someone else, or walk away. Continue to be a good example of what a veg*n is and maybe she will eventually get the message. As the saying goes, "Actions speak louder than words."</div>
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This is great advice <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/smiley.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=":)">
 

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Discussion Starter · #9 ·
disney.jessica she has been a "vegetarian" for 1 1/2 years or so she tells me :/ , i dont know what vegetarian still thinks chicken noodle soup is okay after that long but oh well. I have not preached anything on her because I believe that does more negative than positive, but I have given her resources that I've found helpful. As for inviting them over, lets just say that did not go over so well :p thats where a lot of the criticism came from.. (most of which didn't make sense) So I kept a smile on my face and my fiance stepped in and said if youre in my home as a guest I'd appreciate a little respect :p. People these days..<br><br>
But thanks for the advice everyone! I definitely tend to continue to set a good example, she may get on my nerves but I will just politely ignore her ignorant comments <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/smiley.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=":)">
 

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<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>KassandraLynn</strong> <a href="/forum/post/2955744"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a><br><br>
I haven't said anything to her about her eating habits, it just frustrates me.. but I know its not my job to change her, and I cant do so. I HAVE said things about her opinions of my eating habits though.</div>
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Amongst my friends, if someone criticizes any of our habits while being full of crap themselves, then that's an invitation to openly mock them so they come back down to earth. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/smiley.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=":)">
 
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