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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I've been giving this alot of thought and it is quite hard to make a decision with the question, "Is it wrong to date a meat eater or be with a non-Vegan?" I know it's not flat out wrong, and it may seem on the surface that you're choosing not to be with someone because of their dietary choices, but the point is, if you care about someone ,your boyfriend/girlfriend, and you asked them to change to show that they care about you enough to not do something you're so against, but they say they can't or that they won't, then how do you deal with that? Do you break up with them because they don't care about you enough to make the change and aren't compassionate about animals? I'm saying this because when I started dating my now ex-boyfriend, I really was conflicted with this, and that's why it's eventually ended because I saw that he didn't really care. So give me your opinions on this. Sorry if this thread seems all over the place.
 

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My husband was a total a** when I met him BUT I knew I wanted to be with him and he was a pretty open guy so I knew I had a shot at showing him whats what. Little by little, mainly through example he realized and changed without any harping or nagging. I just let him come to me. It totally worked and now he helps me with my vegan blog and we have 3 vegan kids. I think sometimes its worth the effort. He wasnt one of the "hopeless" types so I gave him a chance and now he is vegan (it took a long time) and quite happy about it
Now we are about to celebrate our 5 year wedding anniversary! You never know.
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
I know it's not just a dietary choice, but I said on the surface it appears that way. I've been called shallow by a supposed "friend" of mine, she said that "I can't believe you don't want to date someone just because of what they eat." But I agree completely that it's a lifestyle.
 
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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
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Originally Posted by veganmama884 View Post

My husband was a total a** when I met him BUT I knew I wanted to be with him and he was a pretty open guy so I knew I had a shot at showing him whats what. Little by little, mainly through example he realized and changed without any harping or nagging. I just let him come to me. It totally worked and now he helps me with my vegan blog and we have 3 vegan kids. I think sometimes its worth the effort. He wasnt one of the "hopeless" types so I gave him a chance and now he is vegan (it took a long time) and quite happy about it
Now we are about to celebrate our 5 year wedding anniversary! You never know.
WEWT!!!! Congradulations!!!!
 
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Depends on one's attitude towards others. I have a vegan family, but my wife was a lifelong vegetarian until recently. Nothing i did made up her mind at all. She did it out of knowledge from a book. I wasn't a fan of her being vegetarian, but I loved her and knew she had to make the decision for herself. If she had remained vegetarian, that would not affect our life as a couple.
 

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My boyfriend is a vegetarian like me (neither of us is vegan). It's really awesome not to have any conflict when it comes to food. My last boyfriend was an omnivore, and we didn't have much conflict. Still, I had a really horrible time watching him eat a fish once. And it's true that if your veganism is very important to you, you want to find someone compatible to you in that regard.
 

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Originally Posted by JadisTheVeganZombie View Post

WEWT!!!! Congradulations!!!!
Thanks
I got a husband and helped someone become vegan. Thats the way I look at it!
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JadisTheVeganZombie View Post

I know it's not just a dietary choice, but I said on the surface it appears that way. I've been called shallow by a supposed "friend" of mine, she said that "I can't believe you don't want to date someone just because of what they eat." But I agree completely that it's a lifestyle.
You're not shallow for wanting to be with someone who shares your values. That's what anyone would want. But a lot of times omnis don't see it as our values, they see it as "oh so and so is being crazy again". They cannot understand because they don't want to. Would you want to marry a person who wants kids when you don't, or vice versa? It matters to you, so it's important.
 

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I should mention my husband wasn't vegan when I met him. I was veg*n he was omni. I made the choice to go vegan, and he decided for himself to go vegan a month or so later, once he saw how easy it was. But if he was still omni, or against my choices, I don't know if it would work out. My veganism is a MAJOR part of my life and I'm not sure I could share my life with someone who didn't feel the same way about such an important issue.
 

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My boyfriend is an omnivore, but since dating me he's mostly stopped eating meat and dairy. He's close to being vegan


I actually did break up with a guy because of his opinion on animal rights and veg*nism. I told him about the horrors of factory farming, and he told me he just didn't care. That was the end of that.

For most veg*ns, our diet/lifestyle is a HUGE part of who we are. How can you date someone who doesn't care about the thing that you (I assume) care about very deeply and passionately? Unless there's a chance that I'll convert them (as I am doing with my boyfriend), I wouldn't touch an omni guy with a ten-foot pole. Meat-mouth...shudder.
 

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I've dated meat eaters in the past and it hasn't really worked. Sometimes for reasons other than me being veg, but most of the time it plays a pretty big factor in the breakup or why the relationship doesn't go to long term.

My boyfriend is veggie (not vegan), and I'm okay with that since I'm not fully vegan myself (I have eggs in something on a rare occasion if someone has made it or small amounts of dairy that I can tolerate). If for some reason we were to break up (which I hope not!), I'd be very reluctant to date someone who ate meat and would want to know how they felt about vegetarians/vegans before I started dating them seriously.

Usually (at least what I've seen) when there isn't exactly a positive review of vegetarians or vegans in the beginning ... it means it usually doesn't work out in the long term.
 

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Excellent first date icebreaker:

"So how do you feel about the needless torture and slaughter of animals?"
 

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Quote:
Originally Posted by sequoia View Post

Excellent first date icebreaker:

"So how do you feel about the needless torture and slaughter of animals?"
I like it, I like it.
 

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Originally Posted by River View Post

I like it, I like it.
LOL me too!
 

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I've only been veg*n for four months or so, and I've been with my husband for eight years. I have no intentions of leaving him. He's still an omnivore, and while it bothers me sometimes, he is very considerate of me and shares a lot of my beliefs. I only cook vegetarian at home, and he will always eat it and never ask for anything else. He never even said anything when I threw out all the meat in our house. He tried also being veg*n for a couple days but he didn't have the right motivations so it didn't stick. He only eats meat when he goes out and that might be as far as we get, and I'm happy with that.

He does call me crazy for wanting to be vegan though. And I agree! I am craaaaazy!


If I were not with my husband, I would definitely be looking in the veg*n community for a partner.
 

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Originally Posted by Limes View Post

I've only been veg*n for four months or so, and I've been with my husband for eight years. I have no intentions of leaving him. He's still an omnivore, and while it bothers me sometimes, he is very considerate of me and shares a lot of my beliefs. I only cook vegetarian at home, and he will always eat it and never ask for anything else. He never even said anything when I threw out all the meat in our house. He tried also being veg*n for a couple days but he didn't have the right motivations so it didn't stick. He only eats meat when he goes out and that might be as far as we get, and I'm happy with that.

He does call me crazy for wanting to be vegan though. And I agree! I am craaaaazy!


If I were not with my husband, I would definitely be looking in the veg*n community for a partner.
right, in a situation like that it's much different. and your husband supports you and doesn't complain or belittle you, which is excellent. dating is totally different and if i weren't with my husband i would do the same.
 

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Pretty much a must for me, yeah.

Just before and after I went vegan, AR was of course all I could talk about with everyone, including the bf. I asked him to watch Earthlings, and he did. He ended up deciding to go vegan, too. If he hadn't, it would have been a problem. I don't think I could be with, stay with someone who felt comfortable contributing to animal exploitation.

I can be friends with non-vegans, although issues do come up from time to time. It's definitely easier with other vegans. But with dating, relationships... Ideally the person would already be vegan, but if not, I wouldn't want them to be changing for me. Of course it's okay if they're inspired to change by me, but I want them doing it for the right reasons...
 

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I think sharing the same values and interests is important. I'd want a husband that was at least vegetarian. I think it'd also be easier to bond, trying out different veg*n foods together or doing things like visiting animal sanctuaries. Sure an omni can do all that, but they won't have the same enthusiasm for it as a veg*n would. Maybe it's just because I don't know any veg*ns in real life right now, but I don't want to feel left out and alone again for the rest of my life like I do in my current omni family and I think I'd feel that way having an omni husband. Just like I want someone who loves Disney to go to Disneyland with me and appreciates all the little details and history like I do, I want someone who also has the same enthusiasm for interesting veg*n dishes and loving animals. I don't know if that really effectively describes what I mean, but basically I'd imagine my significant other as a veg*n, I don't even consider ever dating an omni once I'm old enough to date.
 
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