first off, im sorry that you clicked this thread. nobody should have to. and i definetely never imagined id be someone dealing wiht something like this. its odd how it hits you and you never saw it coming then suddenly its everything and the days when it wasn't..seem like some weird dream .
i just wanted to share a reminder about what's being missed out on.
because tonight i was TRULY truly care free. and instead of the night being crap for no reason (you know how sometimes you have a technically awesome night but you just don't feel it. be it due to general hopelessness, hunger, malnutrition, etc. etc. etc. ?) ..well this is the reverse.
nothing majorly fantastic has happened. in fact a few things that would normally send me off my rocker have. but im happy regardless. just content, and happy. for no particular reason. just because i can be. and it feels GREAT. and i feel so..powerful. FAR more powerful than when im the only one in the room eating 'healthily' or something like that. powerful because i CHOSE what i wanted. i did what i wanted. and loved it. and then forgot about it, and had a great night with the energy i got from that.
i dont know..it sounds silly, i just..really wanted to post that.
good luck today/tonight, guys.