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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I'm wondering about some of your thoughts here.<br><br>
Taking solace/comfort in the unhappiness. It seems like it can ALMOST be comfortable being unhappy in a depression or discomfort for whatever reason. I see that on here at times.<br><br>
I'm wondering why that is.<br><br>
FTR, I don't find solace in it. I've definitely been mired in depression and major frustration/sadness etc. But, I've always found it a necessity to fight my way out of it.<br><br>
Thoughts?? <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/huh.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=":confused:">
 

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Everyone uses a crutch at some point. For some, misery is as good a crutch as any. Personally, I have no use for misery and do all I can to work myself out of it.
 

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I agree with Ahimsa. As someone with clinical depression, I don't know why anyone would want to remain unhappy.
 

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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>sequoia</strong> <a href="/forum/post/2899253"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a><br><br>
I agree with Ahimsa. As someone with clinical depression, I don't know why anyone would want to remain unhappy.</div>
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and that is my point. some folks seem to relish in it. perhaps it's what/all they know?! Perhaps too much goth in their blood (my mandatory joke)?
 

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I think it's a learned trait. Siblings, parents or maybe a social circle teach suffering and reward those who submit.
 

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This is my grandma. She seems to derive some special power to continue to live from hating everyone, including members of her family. I think there is a power in unhappiness that can be harnessed to get your self out of bed everyday... a corrupted desire that brings the day anew. I much prefer to use a positive emotion, happiness, hope, expectation, to get me out of bed every morning... but that doesn't mean the power in unhappiness isn't there.
 

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Discussion Starter · #7 ·
<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>Rotoshave</strong> <a href="/forum/post/2899263"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a><br><br>
This is my grandma. She seems to derive some special power to continue to live from hating everyone, including members of her family. I think there is a power in unhappiness that can be harnessed to get your self out of bed everyday... a corrupted desire that brings the day anew. I much prefer to use a positive emotion, happiness, hope, expectation, to get me out of bed every morning... but that doesn't mean the power in unhappiness isn't there.</div>
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This is interesting, but not quite what i was thinking of. But, there are numerous women (including on grandmother) i grew up with that were very angry and volatile women. My aunt forced her husband (my uncle) to sleep on the floor next to their bed when he was on his deathbed cuz he was very sick and she didn't want him to mess up the sheets. He died shortly after.<br><br>
Definitely women in my life that seemed to thrive on some sort of unhappiness until their bitter end.
 

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A heavy depression might be hard to take solace in, since it's pretty much hard to do anything whilst being in it.<br><br>
but yeah, a negativity might be as driving as positivity when it comes to life.<br><br>
or it's just a call for help.
 

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<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>*AHIMSA*</strong> <a href="/forum/post/2899250"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a><br><br>
Everyone uses a crutch at some point. For some, misery is as good a crutch as any. Personally, I have no use for misery and do all I can to work myself out of it.</div>
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^^that<br><br>
I've been depressed too. right now i'm going through a divorce that is (at times) sucking the life out of me. but...some people do like to wallow in self pity. poor me this...poor me that.
 

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<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>unovegan</strong> <a href="/forum/post/2899271"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a><br><br>
This is interesting, but not quite what i was thinking of. But, there are numerous women (including on grandmother) i grew up with that were very angry and volatile women. <b>My aunt forced her husband (my uncle) to sleep on the floor next to their bed when he was on his deathbed cuz he was very sick and she didn't want him to mess up the sheets. He died shortly after.</b><br><br>
Definitely women in my life that seemed to thrive on some sort of unhappiness until their bitter end.</div>
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That is so sad! Your poor uncle. I can't imagine being married to (or even friends with) someone who harbors so much hatred in their heart.
 

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I've met people who seem to be almost comfortable with being miserable. I honestly don't understand it. My few bouts with depression/anger have been exhausting, all I want is to feel better, lighter and sunnier.
 

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Discussion Starter · #12 ·
<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>sequoia</strong> <a href="/forum/post/2899305"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a><br><br>
That is so sad! Your poor uncle. I can't imagine being married to (or even friends with) someone who harbors so much hatred in their heart.</div>
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yeah, she was just like her mother. is. She's still around. such an angry woman. i have nothing to do with her. I think along with my grandmother, these women feel like they were given the shaft in life (like it was out of their hands) and are/were pissed about it.
 

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<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>Floridaisa</strong> <a href="/forum/post/2899303"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a><br><br>
^^that<br><br>
I've been depressed too. right now i'm going through a divorce that is (at times) sucking the life out of me. but...some people do like to wallow in self pity. poor me this...poor me that.</div>
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I think you're on to something. It could be a way to get attention. I have a friend like that. She had a horrible childhood (verbally and physically abused), and she lets it run her life. She just can't let go and whenever anything mildly bad happens to her she just about breaks down and wallows in self pity. I try to be supportive, but it is very difficult to be around someone like that.
 

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Discussion Starter · #14 ·
<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>Poppy</strong> <a href="/forum/post/2899308"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a><br><br>
I've met people who seem to be almost comfortable with being miserable. I honestly don't understand it. My few bouts with depression/anger have been exhausting, all I want is to feel better, lighter and sunnier.</div>
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yeah, i've read books that somewhat romanticize being enveloped in the darkness. and it's 'almost' as the common answer for the comfort level.
 

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<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>unovegan</strong> <a href="/forum/post/2899315"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a><br><br>
yeah, i've read books that somewhat romanticize being enveloped in the darkness. and it's 'almost' as the common answer for the comfort level.</div>
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I did this as a teenager. I was going through a "goth" phase. I don't know what I was thinking.
 

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<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>unovegan</strong> <a href="/forum/post/2899271"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a><br><br>
This is interesting, but not quite what i was thinking of. But, there are numerous women (including on grandmother) i grew up with that were very angry and volatile women. My aunt forced her husband (my uncle) to sleep on the floor next to their bed when he was on his deathbed cuz he was very sick and she didn't want him to mess up the sheets. He died shortly after.<br><br>
Definitely women in my life that seemed to thrive on some sort of unhappiness until their bitter end.</div>
</div>
<br>
wow.
 

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Discussion Starter · #17 ·
<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>sequoia</strong> <a href="/forum/post/2899319"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a><br><br>
I did this as a teenager. I was going through a "goth" phase. I don't know what I was thinking.</div>
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oh, i do. *smirk*<br><br>
Yeah, glorifying something like this helps not at all.
 

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<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>unovegan</strong> <a href="/forum/post/2899327"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a><br><br>
oh, i do. *smirk*<br><br>
Yeah, glorifying something like this helps not at all.</div>
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I'll give you something to smirk about, boy. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/tongue3.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=":p">
 

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<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>sequoia</strong> <a href="/forum/post/2899311"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a><br><br>
I think you're on to something. It could be a way to get attention. I have a friend like that. She had a horrible childhood (verbally and physically abused), and she lets it run her life. She just can't let go and whenever anything mildly bad happens to her she just about breaks down and wallows in self pity. I try to be supportive, but it is very difficult to be around someone like that.</div>
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if you stop and think about it, we've ALL had crap in our lives. some better, some worse. it's not the problems you have, but the way you handle them. i know that sometimes the depression is way too much and one does need help. but if you just go around in the self pity cloud, well that's just an injustice you do to yourself.
 

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Discussion Starter · #20 ·
<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>sequoia</strong> <a href="/forum/post/2899333"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a><br><br>
I'll give you something to smirk about, boy. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/tongue3.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=":p"></div>
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i think we're cross threading here. and this ISN'T about the UNHAPPY darkness.
 
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