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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I was recently going through a bunch of old blogs of mine and found this questionnaire I had written to amuse myself. Take it, I could use a good laugh and so could you! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/smiley.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=":)"><br><br>
1. Have you ever spit off of the Sears Tower?<br><br>
2. If your plane crashed in the middle of an icy tundra with no hope of a rescue in the near future, would you eat yellow snow?<br><br>
3. Has your mom ever caught you masturbating to That's So Raven?<br><br>
4. Would you eat an entire jar of mayonaise in exchange for a haunted hayride with Justin Beiber?<br><br>
5. Can you count to 10 backwards?<br><br>
6. Do you have a Star Trek uniform?<br><br>
7. As a child were you afraid of clowns and or cats sucking the life out of you while you slept?<br><br>
8. Are you a trichotillomaniac?<br><br>
9. Do you secretly listen to Lionel Richie while taking cold showers?<br><br>
10. Are you an a$shole?<br><br>
11. Candied yams or pickle sandwiches?<br><br>
12. What is the capital of Madagascar?<br><br>
13. Who is your favorite super hero?<br><br>
14. Would you rather be a red head or allergic to dander?<br><br>
15. Baseball uniforms or gag balls?<br><br>
16. Have you ever sneezed in the salad bar?<br><br>
17. Have you ever woken up in a puddle of your own vomit?<br><br>
18. Do you pee a little when you laugh too hard?<br><br>
19. What is your social security number?<br><br>
20. The end or the middle?
 

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Um yeah.<br><br>
Also...please don't post your Social Security numbers on the Internet. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/dizzy2.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=":dizzy:">
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
it's a joke. good grief.
 

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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
How on earth do you delete threads?
 

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Don't get upset, I like silly threads like this and I know lots of other people do too <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/grin.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=":D"><br>
That's what the patch and fun'n'games forums are for <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/smiley.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=":)"><br><br>
I prefer the end <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/yes.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=":yes:">
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
Not upset, just a teensy annoyed by the condescending remark. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/tongue3.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=":p">
 

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Capital of Madagascar is Tana!!!<br><br>
Well Antananarivo but most people call it Tana...<br><br>
And yes, I knew that without googling!<br><br>
(I spent the best part of two years thinking I was going to Madagascar, I learnt all sorts of crazy stuff about the place.)
 

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The SS thing wasn't directed at you...we really do have people who are obsessed (it seems) with surveys and just might put their number there. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/smiley.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=":)">
 

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<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>Earthling</strong> <a href="/forum/post/2889354"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a><br><br>
I don't have an SS number, maybe I can post my credit card details and PIN number?</div>
</div>
<br>
don't forget the expiration date :p
 

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And your postcode and house number? <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/wink3.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=";)">
 

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Okay!<br><br>
But first let me explain that I am the wealthy son of a Nigerian gold miner. He has recently died (I am most upset) and has left $4billion in a bank account. However the Nigerian government will not let me inherit it because they want it for themselves. I need an American or English person to let me transfer the money into their account, which the Nigerian government have no control over, and then send it to me. That person would of course receive a reward of 10% of the money for helping me. So if a suitable person would post their credit card details I will then post mine.
 

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oh, i will, i will!!!!
 

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it's not all about you VW. sheesh.
 

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<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>Vegan Wannabe</strong> <a href="/forum/post/2889225"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a><br><br>
I was recently going through a bunch of old blogs of mine and found this questionnaire I had written to amuse myself.<br><br>
3. Has your mom ever caught you masturbating to That's So Raven?<br><br>
4. Would you eat an entire jar of mayonaise in exchange for a haunted hayride with Justin Beiber?</div>
</div>
<br>
WHY? WHY? WHY?<br><br>
I've had to endure sitting through episodes of That's So Raven and the last thing it ever made me want to do is masturbate. (Cute, little Olivia from the Cosby show is still cute but holy hell that girl is obnoxious.)<br><br>
And I've always been disgusted by the nasty consistency and texture of slimy mayo, I would suck it up and eat a jar of vegenaise just so I wouldn't have to see that little Beiber *******.
 

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<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>Vegan Wannabe</strong> <a href="/forum/post/2889225"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a><br><br>
I was recently going through a bunch of old blogs of mine and found this questionnaire I had written to amuse myself. Take it, I could use a good laugh and so could you! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/smiley.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=":)"><br><br>
1. Have you ever spit off of the Sears Tower?</div>
</div>
<br>
Never been to Chicago, so no.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">2. If your plane crashed in the middle of an icy tundra with no hope of a rescue in the near future, would you eat yellow snow?</div>
</div>
<br>
Can't really answer that until I've been in that situation.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">3. Has your mom ever caught you masturbating to That's So Raven?</div>
</div>
<br>
I don't live with my parents and I don't watch That's So Raven. N/A.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">4. Would you eat an entire jar of mayonaise in exchange for a haunted hayride with Justin Beiber?</div>
</div>
<br>
No.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">5. Can you count to 10 backwards?<br><br>
6. Do you have a Star Trek uniform?<br><br>
7. As a child were you afraid of clowns and or cats sucking the life out of you while you slept?<br><br>
8. Are you a trichotillomaniac?<br><br>
9. Do you secretly listen to Lionel Richie while taking cold showers?</div>
</div>
<br>
No to all of these.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">10. Are you an a$shole?</div>
</div>
<br>
Yes.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">11. Candied yams or pickle sandwiches?</div>
</div>
<br>
Neither.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">12. What is the capital of Madagascar?</div>
</div>
<br>
Antananarivo.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">13. Who is your favorite super hero?</div>
</div>
<br>
Don't have one.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">14. Would you rather be a red head or allergic to dander?<br><br>
15. Baseball uniforms or gag balls?</div>
</div>
<br>
Neither to both questions.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">16. Have you ever sneezed in the salad bar?<br><br>
17. Have you ever woken up in a puddle of your own vomit?<br><br>
18. Do you pee a little when you laugh too hard?</div>
</div>
<br>
No to all three.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">19. What is your social security number?</div>
</div>
<br>
867 5309.<br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">20. The end or the middle?</div>
</div>
<br>
Neither.
 

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<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>Vegan Wannabe</strong> <a href="/forum/post/2889225"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a><br><br>
1. Have you ever spit off of the Sears Tower?</div>
</div>
<br>
No.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">2. If your plane crashed in the middle of an icy tundra with no hope of a rescue in the near future, would you eat yellow snow?</div>
</div>
<br>
No, because there would be non-yellow snow nearby.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">3. Has your mom ever caught you masturbating to That's So Raven?</div>
</div>
<br>
No.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">4. Would you eat an entire jar of mayonaise in exchange for a haunted hayride with Justin Beiber?</div>
</div>
<br>
No, I don't want to deal with that creep.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">5. Can you count to 10 backwards?</div>
</div>
<br>
Yes: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 01<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">6. Do you have a Star Trek uniform?</div>
</div>
<br>
Yes. No wait, no I don't.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">7. As a child were you afraid of clowns and or cats sucking the life out of you while you slept?</div>
</div>
<br>
No, because I was dead then.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">8. Are you a trichotillomaniac?</div>
</div>
<br>
I don't believe in dinosaurs.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">9. Do you secretly listen to Lionel Richie while taking cold showers?</div>
</div>
<br>
Yes, I always invite him with me to the shower and hear him go on about his life while taking the shower.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">10. Are you an a$shole?</div>
</div>
<br>
Yes, yes, yes, YES!<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">11. Candied yams or pickle sandwiches?</div>
</div>
<br>
I'll take frosted pears.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">12. What is the capital of Madagascar?</div>
</div>
<br>
Madagascarstan.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">13. Who is your favorite super hero?</div>
</div>
<br>
George Costanza.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">14. Would you rather be a red head or allergic to dander?</div>
</div>
<br>
I'd rather be allergic to toenails and with green armpit hair.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">15. Baseball uniforms or gag balls?</div>
</div>
<br>
Gag balls -- the kind of parties where everyone throws up.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">16. Have you ever sneezed in the salad bar?</div>
</div>
<br>
No, but I've thrown up in the soup cafe.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">17. Have you ever woken up in a puddle of your own vomit?</div>
</div>
<br>
No, I never produce that much vomit.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">18. Do you pee a little when you laugh too hard?</div>
</div>
<br>
No. Which either means "it's a lot, not a little" or "what a disgusting question".<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">19. What is your social security number?</div>
</div>
<br>
1-2-3-AWESOME<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">20. The end or the middle?</div>
</div>
<br>
1/3 from the bottom.
 

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<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">1. Have you ever spit off of the Sears Tower?</div>
</div>
<br>
No, but I have been to the top of the Sears Tower. But now it's no longer called the Sears Tower. It's the Willis Tower.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">2. If your plane crashed in the middle of an icy tundra with no hope of a rescue in the near future, would you eat yellow snow?</div>
</div>
<br>
I would hold out for some blue snow cones.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">3. Has your mom ever caught you masturbating to That's So Raven?</div>
</div>
<br>
Not yet.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">4. Would you eat an entire jar of mayonaise in exchange for a haunted hayride with Justin Beiber?</div>
</div>
<br>
I'm insulted that you even asked such a question. I wouldn't be caught dead around him.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">5. Can you count to 10 backwards?</div>
</div>
<br>
To count <b>to</b> 10 backwards, you would have to start from a number greater than 10. Therefore I must ask: backwards from what number?<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">6. Do you have a Star Trek uniform?</div>
</div>
<br>
It's at the dry cleaners.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">7. As a child were you afraid of clowns and or cats sucking the life out of you while you slept?</div>
</div>
<br>
No. I would be afraid that a cat may pee on me, though.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">8. Are you a trichotillomaniac?</div>
</div>
<br>
I pull other people's hair.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">9. Do you secretly listen to Lionel Richie while taking cold showers?</div>
</div>
<br>
Nope.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">10. Are you an a$shole?</div>
</div>
<br>
It depends on who you ask.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">11. Candied yams or pickle sandwiches?</div>
</div>
<br>
Pickle sandwiches. With tofurky, lettuce, tomato, red onion, banana peppers and vegenaise. Oh, and hold the pickles.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">12. What is the capital of Madagascar?</div>
</div>
<br>
Nascar.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">13. Who is your favorite super hero?</div>
</div>
<br>
The Coon.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">14. Would you rather be a red head or allergic to dander?</div>
</div>
<br>
Why couldn't I be both?<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">15. Baseball uniforms or gag balls?</div>
</div>
<br>
Gag balls. Whatever they are, they must be better than uniforms.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">16. Have you ever sneezed in the salad bar?</div>
</div>
<br>
Not by accident.
<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block"><br>
17. Have you ever woken up in a puddle of your own vomit?</div>
</div>
<br>
Almost every day.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">18. Do you pee a little when you laugh too hard?</div>
</div>
<br>
Yes. And when I'm surprised or scared. Or just need to relieve myself.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">19. What is your social security number?</div>
</div>
<br>
000-00-0001<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">20. The end or the middle?</div>
</div>
<br>
The middle usually has the best stuff.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">21. Why do you have an extra question?</div>
</div>
<br>
I have no idea.
 

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Impeach the gangster
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<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>Earthling</strong> <a href="/forum/post/2889382"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a><br><br>
Okay!<br><br>
But first let me explain that I am the wealthy son of a Nigerian gold miner. He has recently died (I am most upset) and has left $4billion in a bank account. However the Nigerian government will not let me inherit it because they want it for themselves. I need an American or English person to let me transfer the money into their account, which the Nigerian government have no control over, and then send it to me. That person would of course receive a reward of 10% of the money for helping me. So if a suitable person would post their credit card details I will then post mine.</div>
</div>
<br>
They actually tried to scam me this way. Only she was the daughter of the Interior Minister, who was killed by Revolutionaries, and she had to flee to a refugee camp. I reported her to the Better Business Bureau. They sent in SEALS to assassinate her.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>Vegan Wannabe</strong> <a href="/forum/post/2889225"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a><br><br>
1. Have you ever spit off of the Sears Tower?</div>
</div>
<br>
Dummy. The Sears Tower observation deck is sealed. The best you can do is spit on the glass.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">2. If your plane crashed in the middle of an icy tundra with no hope of a rescue in the near future, would you eat yellow snow?</div>
</div>
<br>
I'd eat the flight attendant.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">3. Has your mom ever caught you masturbating to That's So Raven?</div>
</div>
<br>
No, but I caught <i>her</i> doing it.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">4. Would you eat an entire jar of mayonaise in exchange for a haunted hayride with Justin Beiber?</div>
</div>
<br>
Pass.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">5. Can you count to 10 backwards?</div>
</div>
<br>
No. I got fired from NASA for this very reason.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">6. Do you have a Star Trek uniform?</div>
</div>
<br>
Yes, a Cardassian Gul.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">7. As a child were you afraid of clowns and or cats sucking the life out of you while you slept?</div>
</div>
<br>
No. I figured whatever happened while I was asleep I wasn't responsible for.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">8. Are you a trichotillomaniac?</div>
</div>
<br>
No, I just go to a barber.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">9. Do you secretly listen to Lionel Richie while taking cold showers?</div>
</div>
<br>
No, wearing headphones while showering is unsafe.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">10. Are you an a$shole?</div>
</div>
<br>
No, but I have one. I've never seen it in person, but I'm pretty sure it's back there.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">11. Candied yams or pickle sandwiches?</div>
</div>
<br>
Yam sandwiches.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">12. What is the capital of Madagascar?</div>
</div>
<br>
Moscow.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">13. Who is your favorite super hero?</div>
</div>
<br>
Heidi Staley, Penthouse Pet of the Month, Aug., '94.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">14. Would you rather be a red head or allergic to dander?</div>
</div>
<br>
How much does the position pay?<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">17. Baseball uniforms or gag balls?</div>
</div>
<br>
I'm not really into bondage.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">16. Have you ever sneezed in the salad bar?</div>
</div>
<br>
No. I'm afraid of the salad bar. I sang karaoke once at the oasis.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">42. Have you ever woken up in a puddle of your own vomit?</div>
</div>
<br>
It seems to me, if I fell asleep in vomit, I probably wouldn't remember whose vomit it was. I really don't remember.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">2/3. Do you pee a little when you laugh too hard?</div>
</div>
<br>
No. And I don't fart either.<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">-1. What is your social security number?</div>
</div>
<br>
I'm reporting you to the FBI, you thieving son of a motherless goat!<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">20. The end or the middle?</div>
</div>
<br>
Everybody Loves Raymond.
 

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Arrrg! Me mateys.
Joined
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5,591 Posts
<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>sleepydvdr</strong> <a href="/forum/post/2889858"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a><br><br>
No, but I have been to the top of the Sears Tower. But now it's no longer called the Sears Tower. It's the Willis Tower.</div>
</div>
<br>
NO! No no no no no no no no no it's not! NO NO NO! BAD!
 
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