[jAded]

Since I've come home from 8 months overseas every question seems to be "So what are you doing with the rest of your life?". The final straw was my GP today giving me the why don't you have husband/career/PhD/mortgage third degree. I then got a lecture on how I can't just keep having fun, I need to continue studying (which I do intend to do) and then he launched into a spiel on how his kids have high distinctions in their chemical engineering degrees AND they spent a year in Israel. Did I actually ask?

I'm sick of strangers telling me what I'm doing with my life isn't good enough. I'm not 30 and on the dole (welfare) with no prospects of doing anything. I'm just trying to get this out of the way so I don't have some sort of crisis in a decade or two when I am tied down with kids and a mortgage and wish I had spent a year or so travelling.

/end rant.

So does anyone else constantly get quizzed by ''concerned'' distant relatives or family friends or someone you went to high school with 3 years ago about why no boyfriend or kids or house or something? Grr.

 

[veggielove]

People have a way they think things should work, and they don't keep their mouths shut about it. EVen if you do have the good job, and the boyfriend, they ask you "why aren't you engaged?" and then when you get engaged, its "why aren't you getting married sooner/in a church/with meat at wedding/by father burns/closer to home" etc. Then when you get married they ask you about kids. then when you're pregnant they ask you when you're gonna get a house because an apartment isn't a real place to raise a kid. But they really DO mean well.... they just want the "best" for you. whether or not they know best is the question, but I think they have good intentions, so don't get it get to you.

 

[Jessica Alana]

I get the "So, are you dating anyone yet?" and the "You've had a good job for a while now, are you going to buy a house anytime soon?"

People have taken issue with how I live my life for years. You learn to not really give a ****. Lucky them that it's my life and not theirs.

 

[carlx]

More often than not, i find that people expressing this sort of concern says more about their perception of their own station in life than it does about yours. These people are likely feeling a sense of feeling trapped by their own circumstances, and therefore devise a world view that tells them that the road that they have chosen is the 'proper' road for everyone. Take their comments with that in mind, maintain compassion for them, and feel free that you do not have those boundaries...or feel the need to preach your life to others.

The road less travelled can be a lonely one.

 

[barefootchick]

I was unemployed for a few months in the summer. I also had a couple of jobs that didn't work out before that. I was thrilled to get at least a part-time job that I like. I still have that job almost five months later. I think my current job is a good start to a career path or at least in helping me in figuring out what I want to do. I plan on working at this job for a while.

I went up to my grandparents' house for Thanksgiving. I saw at least twenty or more relatives that weekend. I talked to at least three people who said something along the lines of "What are you going to do next? This is just a temporary job, right?" I was thinking, but didn't say, "What do you people want from me!? I found a job I'm happy at and good at doing."

I don't know what people expect of me, but quite frankly, I'm getting sick of it. No one asked me the important question: "Are you happy?" I would have liked to hear that question. I don't know what my answer would have been, but I don't hear that question from anyone.

I'm trying not to care what people think. It's getting easier as I get older, but I still struggle with concentrating on what I want and not letting other people influence me in the wrong directions. I don't mind advice, but I need to choose whether I listen to it or not.

jAded,

I think its fantastic that youre traveling and journeying now. I keep wanting to do it and I will, but money is a big factor. I hold you in high regard for doing what you want right now.

 

[troub]

The quality of ones life is not defined by the number of digits they receive in a year, nor the accolades on the wall.

Success has no monetary value.

 

[Iria]

I'm majoring in Creative Writing. It's pretty much expected by everyone that I'm going to be living in a box after I get my diploma.

I think it's wonderful that you had the chance to travel. I would love to do that after I graduate, but I doubt I'll end up with the funds or enough courage to go through with it. As long as you're happy, ignore what people say. You know what's best for you.

 

[Jessica Alana]

I also get comments about "Are you going to go back to college?" Um..why? I have a job that I LOVE (which most people can't say) and I make enough to live comfortably working part time. If I'd gone to college (as most people in my field do) people would be congratulating me. Instead, since I took a little bit of a shortcut, i'm not considered as accomplished as those who are thousands and thousands of dollars in college debt, yet in the same place I am workwise? Eh. I had someone tell me that i'm wasting my life because it isn't a real job, and I need to "do something" with my life.

Their reason was because I had it all done and had my career started at 21. Apparently I'm supposed to waste time and money for the next 10 years, THEN focus on the career for it to be a valid career.

 

[TreeManEarthSteward]

Where overseas did you go Jaded? 8 months was obviously a whole lot of something! ..but where?

I have a friend that goes abroad a fair lot but then promptly goes back to work when back home.... Anyway I don't think you are doing anything bad for you.... And you are not 30 yet you say? Anyway....Hope you enjoyed your time abroad....

 

[jAded]

Thanks for all the support, guys.

VA goth, I spent most of my time in Europe. I plan on going back next year to work again mostly, but get a RTW ticket and go via Latin America and spend some time in Asia on the way back.

And no, not quite 30, I'm 22