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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
On Tuesday my parents went to Majorca for a week and I went away with my bf for a short break to London, leaving my brother home alone. He was sufficiently warned by my mum not to have anyone over as he has been really horrible to her recently (swearing at her, saying 'I sincerely hope the car crashes and you die, etc etc) plus she didn't trust him. When I was his age (almost 18) I was allowed parties when my parents were away because they knew I was responsible.<br><br><br>
So, at 3.30am this morning I got a text from my brother saying "A few friends are round sleeping in the living room and back room." I don't see it til I wake up on the bus home at 7am. I get home at 8am. The scene before me is thus:<br><br>
The garden: strewn with bottles, cups, overflowing recycling bins, parts of the grass trampled to mud, random deck chairs on lawn.<br><br>
So far, so bad. Then I get to the house.<br><br>
The kitchen: Curtains missing, presumed damaged. Floor inches thick in dirt. Dishes in sink, random bits of kitchen roll crumpled up. Fridge (which was full when I left) empty except for a bottle of coke. Very large stereo speaker on table. Random shopping bag covering cats dishes. Box where we keep sweets/ crisps missing.<br><br>
The hall: Rug missing, presumed damaged. Also covered in dirt, my socks getting filthy. Place smells like piss.<br><br>
The bathroom: Even more smelly/ covered in dirt. Stuff in the bath.<br><br>
My parents room: has been used as dumping ground, with the 40" tv from the lounge, various covers, cushions, storage boxes etc thrown in here willy nilly.<br><br>
My room: Here is where I get really pissed off. My room was not too tidy when I left as I was packing and left loads of clothes that I couldn't fit into my bag all around, including underwear etc. The set of ladders we keep for the loft are dumped in here- that's not so much of a problem. But some of my books are missing from my bookcase and are on the floor. There are two cans of beer, one lying on the floor and still half full and spilt on floor. There are some open alpro soya deserts next to my bed that I did not leave there. My underwear drawers are closed, and I think they were slightly open when I left... Cats have been shut in here, and are REALLY pleased to see me, suggesting they have not had much attention for the past couple of days. I worry how long they've been stuck in my room.<br><br>
So him and his friends have been in my room. Does anyone else think that is totally disrespectful and not on!?!!! All the rest of it as well, really. I haven't even seen the living room/ back room yet but he has at least 1 full day of cleaning/ tidying to get it back in order, and hopefully the rug and curtains are ok or he's screwed.<br><br>
I'm not really sure what to do, there are still a big bunch of 18 year olds I don't know in my house and I feel like a prisoner in my own room.<br><br>
Would anyone else be totally pissed off by this? And should I tell my parents? (When they get back- I wouldn't want to freak them out on their holiday). I'm worried that he won't bother cleaning up and I can't live in this mess.
 

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Discussion Starter · #2 ·
Now there's this weird smell like they are cooking bacon (my brother/ whole family is veggie so maybe I am wrong). I wish I could man up and go face him but I feel like I will freak out and it's probably better to wait til his friends leave.
 

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I would take pictures of everything and tell your parents when they came back.
 

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Yup, tell your parents, and tell your brother that you're going to. He deserves to sweat it, and telling him should at least encourage him to begin clean up. Take photos so you can show how awful it is, but definitely let him clean up before your parents return, they don't deserve to come back to that.
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
He has started cleaning up with his friends. I have told him I want them gone by 1230pm as I have come back from a long bus journey and want a shower/ lunch without a bunch of 18 year old boys hanging around. If he sticks to that, and it's cleaned up by today then I'll see... I didn't think to take photos but my parents would believe me. He says he doesn't know who was in my room and he didn't let anyone up here and I believe him but still I feel like my privacy has been violated- people I don't know rifling through my things. They even took a pair of shoes I bought out of the bag they were in and I don't know where they put the bag. The whole thing is awful for my parents but I don't know if it's better that they don't know (IF everything is absolutely back the way it was and better). They would be very very upset and as they'll be just back from holiday, I'm not sure I should tell them. I hold the cards now and threatening to tell them may be the only way to ensure he cleans it all up.
 

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Discussion Starter · #7 ·
<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>Marie</strong> <a href="/forum/post/2873067"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a><br><br>
I'd call the police.</div>
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My boyfriend is a police officer and he might come round. I'm not going to call the actual police though because a) It would be a waste of their time and b) I think my brother is sufficiently scared of my mum to need police deterrent and c) he is trying to be decent about it, even though I still think what he did was really wrong.
 

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<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>*AHIMSA*</strong> <a href="/forum/post/2873062"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a><br><br>
I would take pictures of everything and tell your parents when they came back.</div>
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Agreed. Have evidence of the state the house was in, and don't help with the cleaning/clearing up at all (well, except for your room). He needs to shoulder his responsibilities and face any repercussions for his actions.
 

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Discussion Starter · #9 ·
They did cook bacon <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/sad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=":("> as an all veggie household I don't even let my boyfriend do that. And my brother doesn't wash dishes properly so the bacon grease will still be all on the pan <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/sad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=":("> my boyfriend did come round and asked my brother about the cats... apparently they were out most of the night, which is not great but better than being locked up in my room with really loud music stressing them out. But one of my babies has a wee bald patch on her, my bro said it was always there but I don't think so. Also they haven't left yet but have gone to the garden. In a couple of hours I'm heading to my bf's place and leaving my brother to sort it. He has cleaned up a lot of the dirt and moved the TV back already but the stair carpet will need shampooed I think.
 

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<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>*AHIMSA*</strong> <a href="/forum/post/2873062"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a><br><br>
I would take pictures of everything and tell your parents when they came back.</div>
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Yup. Seriously, you need to tell your parents. Don't even think about NOT doing that. He needs to understand that there are consequences to his actions.
 

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<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>Bluejeans84</strong> <a href="/forum/post/2873089"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a><br><br>
Yup. Seriously, you need to tell your parents. Don't even think about NOT doing that. He needs to understand that there are consequences to his actions.</div>
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THIS. Especially considering the bacon. That's disgusting and involved concerted effort to deliberately violate your parent's home with that filth.<br><br>
Also even if your brother doesn't know who was in your room is no excuse. It's the hosts job to make sure that the house and the off-access areas especially aren't tampered with during a party. If he's 18, he should know that.
 

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<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>papayamon</strong> <a href="/forum/post/2873168"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a><br><br>
i'd whip his ass.</div>
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I agree.... Just for letting people into my room.<br><br>
As for everything else... I would just shrug my shoulders and just say not my problem... My brothers have destroyed the house before, but i dont sweat it. I mean... your parents will see and he'll hopefully get what he deserves and you can just sit back and laugh and enjoy it...<br><br>
But still beat his ass for letting people in your room.... Go in his room and break some stuff at least, ask him how it feels.<br><br>
At least... I think you need to get some kind of Sibling revenge.<br>
Heres some ideas that me and my brothers have done to each other...<br><br>
Cut all the cords to all his eletronics in his room.....<br>
Put some dog crap in his bed....<br>
Put Rubbing alcohol in his contact solution... (Holy Crap I thought was going to be blind)<br>
While hes sleeping pour Cayenne pepper in his face or shoot him with a paint ball gun a couple of times.<br>
Pee in his Windsheild wiper Fluid (Might wanna get your boyfriend to do this)<br>
Throw ice water on him while hes asleep...<br>
Next time he has a girl over... total embarrass him. (Its a little low key... but really the lowest blow of the whole list)<br><br>
If you need more ideas... I know 200 or so more.
 

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I would be pissed for them going into my room. but other than that i would let it be. i had lots of fun when i was that age and i wouldn't want to ruin it for the ones who still have the chance to party that hard
 

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^^^ That is a BAD idea. Getting 'revenge' is just going to make the whole situation worse. Don't stoop to his level. Just let him know that you are going to inform your parents of his extracurricular activities and leave it at that.
 

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Discussion Starter · #16 ·
I'm not going to get revenge lol. It wasn't his fault they got in my room, he tried to tell everyone not to go upstairs but obviously they did. I'm pissed off at that but it wasn't malicious on my brothers part. I prefer to be on good terms with him if I can. I haven't said if I'll tell mum or not, but I've told him the place better be pristine. He is grossed out by bacon as much as me, I think his friends just bought some without telling him, so he was scrubbing madly at the pans when I left yesterday. He has definitely started tidying cheerfully, and although there's a lot still to do he'll just have to do it. I guess he wanted to have fun and it got out of hand and now he has to face it and clean it up. If my mum asks me directly if he had a party I'll just say "ask him" and keep out of it.
 

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<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>lucky_charm</strong> <a href="/forum/post/2873683"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a><br><br>
I'm not going to get revenge lol. It wasn't his fault they got in my room, he tried to tell everyone not to go upstairs but obviously they did. I'm pissed off at that but it wasn't malicious on my brothers part. I prefer to be on good terms with him if I can. I haven't said if I'll tell mum or not, but I've told him the place better be pristine. He is grossed out by bacon as much as me, I think his friends just bought some without telling him, so he was scrubbing madly at the pans when I left yesterday. He has definitely started tidying cheerfully, and although there's a lot still to do he'll just have to do it. I guess he wanted to have fun and it got out of hand and now he has to face it and clean it up. If my mum asks me directly if he had a party I'll just say "ask him" and keep out of it.</div>
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Sounds like you've calmed down and the situation is more under control, that's good. Also glad that it wasn't your brother that brought the bacon into the house.
 

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<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>lucky_charm</strong> <a href="/forum/post/2873683"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a><br><br>
If my mum asks me directly if he had a party I'll just say "ask him" and keep out of it.</div>
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Thats a very mature response <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/smiley.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=":)">
 

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<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>Ira</strong> <a href="/forum/post/2873417"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a><br><br>
I would be pissed for them going into my room. but other than that i would let it be. i had lots of fun when i was that age and i wouldn't want to ruin it for the ones who still have the chance to party that hard</div>
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i disagree. by the sounds of it, the curtains and rug are missing, kitchenware has been ruined and everything is filthy.<br>
having a party, fine. trashing house whilst having party, not fine. hes 17 not 5. id grass him up and let him take your mum's wrath.
 

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Discussion Starter · #20 ·
<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>Pirate Ferret</strong> <a href="/forum/post/2873768"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a><br><br>
i disagree. by the sounds of it, the curtains and rug are missing, kitchenware has been ruined and everything is filthy.<br>
having a party, fine. trashing house whilst having party, not fine. hes 17 not 5. id grass him up and let him take your mum's wrath.</div>
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Should probably point out that house is not as wrecked or trashed as I first thought- the rug and curtains were in his room, he thought to put them there so they didn't get fithy like . The dirt was awful though and a lot of things still aren't clean including kitchen and bathroom, and there's still a huge pile of dishes, cups etc he hasn't washed, including glasses in the garden, bathroom and various areas of the house. And the lawn is trampled at parts which my mum will notice. And my parent's room is still full of stuff that belong elsewhere, plus the covers (which my mum uses to keep the couches clean) are not on the couches- I haven't looked to see if they are stained or what, I'm spending most of my time in my room or at my bf's house and leaving my brother to it.
 
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