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I am quite new to this forum and in my readings have picked up that there are a lot of women out there who have omni boyfriends, husbands etc.<br><br><br><br>
I am very curious as to how you deal with this - do you ever try and influence your partner or show them things such as "Meet your Meet" or "Earthlings" ? And if so what do they say? How do they justify their position?<br><br><br><br>
My husband is a strict vegetarian and I would find it *very* difficult to maintain a relationship with someone who didn't share my views on animal cruelty. So just curious as to how people deal with it....
 

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I have been married for 32 years. My husband is an omni and totally does not 'get' my choice of diet. I have been vegetarian for two years and vegan for almost 1 year. Just last week he agreed to try my tofu scramble...he said it was good but not sure if he was just being polite. He also just agreed to try some of my bean/lentil dishes which I will get to this week. As far as expecting him to suddenly give up his way of eating, I don't think it's fair of me to change the 'rules', so to speak after this long a time into the marriage. He is the main bread winner and has been the whole time. He also works 6 days a week. For me to say, this is my kitchen, you can't have what you want in it or eat what you want, does not seem like the way to go for me. I cook 50% of his meals which entails buying pre-cooked meats like grilled chicken or stuff from the deli like sausage and peppers, etc. so I only have to re-heat them. I have not handled raw meat in the last year or so. As far as getting him to watch the videos, he's not interested. It's the I don't want to know mentality. It's not ideal, but it's a fair compromise for a 32 year marriage.
 

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<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>Pegasus</strong> <a href="/forum/post/0"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a><br><br>
I am very curious as to how you deal with this - do you ever try and influence your partner or show them things such as "Meet your Meet" or "Earthlings" ?</div>
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no. in fact, i haven't watched these things.<br><br><br><br>
but, by the very nature of just doing what i'm doing, my husband is influenced. since i became vegetarian, we both have dramatically changed our diets for the better. we both studied nutrition more diligently, and we have both learned to cook.<br><br><br><br>
and, my husband is interested in me and what i'm thinking/doing. so, we discuss a lot of the issues related to vegetarianism and of course this influences both of us.<br><br><br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">And if so what do they say? How do they justify their position?</div>
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my husband really has no need to 'justify' his position. he eats meat because he strongly feels that it is the optimal, healthiest diet. while i don't necessarily believe that one way of eating is 'optimal'--i can accept his position on the matter.<br><br><br><br><br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">y husband is a strict vegetarian and I would find it *very* difficult to maintain a relationship with someone who didn't share my views on animal cruelty. So just curious as to how people deal with it....</div>
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my husband and i do share views on animal cruelty.<br><br><br><br>
both of us agree with the central premise that it is not possible for all humans to be healthy vegans or vegetarians. this is based on both scientific and anecdotal evidence, as well as our own experience. therefore, we see eating meat, dairy, and eggs as a necessity for some people. thus, it's not immoral to acquire these things--only how we acquire them can be problematic (immoral). So, we support those farms that treat the animals in ways that we consider to be 'humane' or 'most humane'--or fit in with our beliefs about how animals should be treated when raised and slaughtered for food.<br><br><br><br>
and, the actual ins-and-outs are easy. we start by making a vegan base to a meal, then we add dairy, eggs, or meat as desired.
 

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I have only been vegetarian about a month. When I told my husband he was very supportive. He agreed it was a good way to eat. Fortunately he loves vegetables as much as I do. We are both overweight and he realizes that neither of us can go on eating the way we did and be healthy. He also loves animals. The main thing that is keeping him from going vegetarian himself is that he hates soy and fake "meat." So I have been trying to avoid those things. I have stated how I feel about animal cruelty and sustainable agriculture, etc. and he will listen up to a point, but he doesn't want a lecture, so I know when to back off. I think if he ever changes it will be for his health more than anything else. I am the cook and he has to eat what I fix since he doesn't cook at all. So since I won't be cooking meat anymore he will only be able to eat meat when he goes out to eat during his lunchbreaks at work. When we go out to eat together he always looks for a place that has vegetarian food for me which is very thoughtful of him.
 

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I was with a vegan for about 5 years. Things didn't work out and I found the wonderful omni guy that I am with now. He will eat anything that I make, he likes alot of the veggie stuff that I make. He mostly just eats meat when we go out to eat or when he goes out to eat. Sometimes it bothers me, like when I see him and others at the table chowing down on chicken wings. He knows that I will not even be at the same table if ribs are being eaten there and he respects that. He respects how I eat and feel, he is my main supporter for going vegan right now and that is a big help. I have asked him to watch Peacable Kingdom with me and he said he will, he just didn't want me thinking that after he watched it that he should be a vegetarian. I told him that how he feels after is up to him and I am not expecting anything. I just want him to know why I eat the way I eat so if he has any questions, he will know.<br><br><br><br>
When I was with my vegan ex, I swore up and down I could never live and love a meat eater, I thought it would be too hard. Honestly it is hard at times, but not what I thought. Not when the omni is caring, loving and wants the best for you like my boyfriend wants. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/yes.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=":yes:">
 

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<span style="color:#FF0000;">I never pressured ryan into anything. I wouldn't cook meat for him, if he wanted it he'd cook it himself. he was always curious about the meat industry and one day he watched meet your meat on his own and made the switch. i was vegan long before i met him though.</span>
 

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My husband is omni, and I have been veggie since before we met. He knows I won't cook meat at home and he loves the vegetarian dishes I prepare. he eats meat when we eat out at restaurants, and he has soup and frozen pizza at home that has meat in it,but thats it. He's very supportive of my lifestyle and does ask questions. He always makes sure the restaurant where we are going has options for me - besides salad. He knows having salad for dinner at a restaurant just annoys me. He watched meet your meat with me and it led to more questions. I don't preach or push with him, its counterproductive with most people. He also is very supportive of my desire to raise our child as vegetarian - he thinks it is a good decision.
 

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<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>Pegasus</strong> <a href="/forum/post/0"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a><br><br><br>
I am very curious as to how you deal with this - do you ever try and influence your partner or show them things such as "Meet your Meet" or "Earthlings" ? And if so what do they say? How do they justify their position?</div>
</div>
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I have not watched these myself and am not part of the AR movement but my husband and I both are supporters of animal welfare.<br><br>
My husband does not need to justify his diet anymore than I need to justify mine.<br><br><br><br><br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">My husband is a strict vegetarian and I would find it *very* difficult to maintain a relationship with someone who didn't share my views on animal cruelty. So just curious as to how people deal with it....</div>
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My husband does share my views on animal cruelty, but animal welfare and preventing cruelty is not the same as animal rights.<br><br>
So we deal with it just fine, diet is a none issue.<br><br>
We do our best to not buy factory farm products and that is pretty much it.
 

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I am vegetarian, my husband eats anything and everything. Diet has always been a non-issue for us. I choose to be a vegetarian because I care about my health, he chooses not to because he doesn't care about his health, case closed.<br><br><br><br>
He is the sole breadwinner and I am the housewife (among other things). When I cook his meals, I do not prepare meat because it is disgusting to deal with and unnecessary. He is okay with that because he trusts my ability to feed him. I don't go up to his work and tell him how to do <i>his</i> job after all. As long as my meals are tasty, hot, and edible, he is happy. I may have married a meat eater, but I would never have married someone who was afraid to try new things or refused to eat a meatless meal.<br><br><br><br>
Also, if I were a vegetarian for ethical reasons, I probably would not have chosen a meat eater to be my husband. Just like if I were a Muslim I wouldn't have married an atheist, or if I hated drugs (which I do), I wouldn't have married someone who uses them. I don't know how I'd be able to be so passionate about a cause and watch the person I love the most do something I hate every single day.
 

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<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>karenlovessnow</strong> <a href="/forum/post/0"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a><br><br>
I have been married for 32 years. My husband is an omni and totally does not 'get' my choice of diet.</div>
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LOL. This sounds like my husband. He made a comment just last night, saying "I can't wait till she's over this "no meat thing." <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/rolleyes.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=":rolleyes:"> He doesn't get it either. He thinks it's a phase. He's going to be in for a shock though, as this is lifestyle that was a long time in coming, I could just never transition over....too many outside influences and wasn't mentally ready. I don't miss meat at all and I've only been veg*n for a short time.<br><br><br><br>
We've been married 17 years and 95% of that time I prepare the meals. I can't just up and quit preparing meat meals for him after all that time. He'd probably rebel! (He'll never go veg*n). He works 7 on 7 off, so I don't have to cook it that often. But I don't know why he gripes about my "no meat thing". He still gets his meat, plus he has more leftovers for meals to take to work. Nothing has changed for him. But I often have to prepare extra dishes for myself when I cook. Then I'll have leftovers for myself for future meals. He won't touch my veggie dishes.....he's veggiephobic! The only things he will eat are corn, peas, some beans, and potatoes. I guess that good compared to his brothers......they only eat corn and potatoes. They won't touch anything else.<br><br><br><br>
I really don't think you can force anyone to stop eating meat. You can educate them with the videos and the books, but ultimately that decision has to come from within. Heck, my husband worked for IBP over 20 years ago, before I met him, (not the kill side, but he had to view the whole process). If that's not enough to change your views on what you eat, I don't know what is.<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/sad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=":(">
 

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My husband and son are omni and my daughter is a recent vegan. My husband eats what I cook and has meat when we eat out. My son sometimes eats what we are having, sometimes gets something I cook just for him and mostly cooks things for himself. I wasnt veg*n when I married and didnt raise the kids that way so I dont expect them to change just because I have. I respect other peoples rights to decide how they want to eat and live their lives and I expect the same respect back.
 

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My husband eats factory meat when we eat out, but we never have it in the home except for dog food.<br><br><br><br>
It's up to him what he eats; he's aware of the issues of factory farming.
 

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My husband and I were both omnis when we got married; so, that wasn't even something taken into consideration. I am patient with my husband. I wish he would give up meat, but I certainly can't force him. I do not cook his meats. We eat separate meals when he wants a meal with meat in it. Some things like country style meals with beans and veggies are always a great meal we can enjoy together. He actually surprised me yesterday and suggested trying a Gardenburger riblet. He really liked it! Now my husband and I have another vegan food that we can enjoy together! This is what I mean about being patient. He has tried tofu and didn't like it. He has tried soy milk and didn't like it, but I got him some rice milk and he's hooked on it. He eats a lot less meat and dairy than he used to because of my influence on him. He reads labels to see if something is vegan or not and if he is not sure he double checks with me. I feel blessed to have such a supportive spouse.
 

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No, I don't try to overtly influence him. He has accepted my switch to vegetarianism very well, but he does get tired of me talking about it all the time. I think if I started becoming strident and militant about it, it would put entirely too much strain on our relationship. I have made two specific rules which I enforce-- I will not buy it or cook it, and I will not pay for it when we eat out, but that's as far as I take it. As zoebird said, though, I do influence him simply by my choices and my constant talking about the everyday issues involved with being veg. He seems happy to be meat-free at home, and is ordering veggie food when we go out with increasing frequency. I don't think I would have gotten that far with him by lecturing or trying to show him graphic videos.
 

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<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>gypsysoul</strong> <a href="/forum/post/0"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a><br><br>
LOL. This sounds like my husband. He made a comment just last night, saying "I can't wait till she's over this "no meat thing." <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/rolleyes.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=":rolleyes:"> He doesn't get it either. He thinks it's a phase. He's going to be in for a shock though, as this is lifestyle that was a long time in coming, I could just never transition over....too many outside influences and wasn't mentally ready. I don't miss meat at all and I've only been veg*n for a short time.<br><br><br><br>
We've been married 17 years and 95% of that time I prepare the meals. I can't just up and quit preparing meat meals for him after all that time. He'd probably rebel! (He'll never go veg*n). He works 7 on 7 off, so I don't have to cook it that often. But I don't know why he gripes about my "no meat thing". He still gets his meat, plus he has more leftovers for meals to take to work. Nothing has changed for him. But I often have to prepare extra dishes for myself when I cook. Then I'll have leftovers for myself for future meals. He won't touch my veggie dishes.....he's veggiephobic! The only things he will eat are corn, peas, some beans, and potatoes. I guess that good compared to his brothers......they only eat corn and potatoes. They won't touch anything else.<br><br><br><br>
I really don't think you can force anyone to stop eating meat. You can educate them with the videos and the books, but ultimately that decision has to come from within. Heck, my husband worked for IBP over 20 years ago, before I met him, (not the kill side, but he had to view the whole process). If that's not enough to change your views on what you eat, I don't know what is.<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/sad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=":("></div>
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My switch to vegetarianism was a long time coming too. But I have NO qualms about not cooking meat. I told my husband I would cook what was in the freezer (not much) and that's it, because I will not go to the meat counter in the grocery store again. I don't even like to walk past it. It makes me nauseous even though I had eaten meat for years. And it is tough even cooking up the raw meat in the freezer. Once I researched all about factory farming and saw a few videos that showed cows, pigs and chickens being slaughtered while still writhing in pain, that was it for me---no more buying and cooking dead animals for me ever!
 

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<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>gypsysoul</strong> <a href="/forum/post/0"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a><br><br>
We've been married 17 years and 95% of that time I prepare the meals. I can't just up and quit preparing meat meals for him after all that time. He'd probably rebel! (He'll never go veg*n).</div>
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Why not? Let him rebel.<br><br><br><br>
OK, I know some people just don't think of that as an option, but seriously, if you're just now switching to being veg, now would be a great time to put your foot down and say "I will continue to put a filling, nutritious, and hopefully delicious meal on the table every day, but it will not have meat in it. If you want meat with your dinners, you can feel free to keep some chicken breasts and burgers in the freezer and grill one up for yourself."<br><br><br><br>
I dunno, maybe my attitude is just fundamentally different from other people. I was raised to accept the idea that the household cook has supreme authority as to what will be had for dinner on any given night, and if you don't like it, tough. I grew up under a rule of "You can eat what I feel like cooking, or you can fend for yourself." So it only seems sensible to me that if I cook for multiple members of a household, I'll apply the same rule. So I had no problem whatsoever telling my SO that I wouldn't cook meat for him anymore.
 

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<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>Pegasus</strong> <a href="/forum/post/0"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a><br><br>
I am quite new to this forum and in my readings have picked up that there are a lot of women out there who have omni boyfriends, husbands etc.<br><br><br><br>
I am very curious as to how you deal with this - do you ever try and influence your partner or show them things such as "Meet your Meet" or "Earthlings" ? And if so what do they say? How do they justify their position?</div>
</div>
<br><br><br>
My bf, who I live with, is omni, but he's a pretty vegan-friendly omni. He never cooks meat in the house, although he does keep some non-vegan items around. He cooks vegan meals about as often as I do. He always eats out where I want to, which is easy since we live in a neighborhood with several ethnic restaurants and even a vegan restaurant. He does eat meat in restaurants sometimes, but I don't give him a hard time since I realize he eats a lot less meat than the average omni.<br><br><br><br>
I don't preach to him about veganism or ask him to justify his choices, because I wouldn't want someone to preach to me or demand that I justify my choices. I know my lifestyle has influenced his, and every so often he takes a new step (ie. changing to soymilk, veggie sausage or Veganaise), but I don't expect him to ever be a full-fledged vegan.<br><br><br><br>
If I feel down about this, I just think of the other good things he does or has done that I don't do (ie. taking the bus to work, trapping feral kitties and taking them to be fixed). Overall, he's a pretty good citizen of the world. Now if he was a meat and potatoes guy who drove a hummer and liked to go hunting, then I don't think I would be with him.
 

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<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>Tesseract</strong> <a href="/forum/post/0"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a><br><br>
Why not? Let him rebel.<br><br><br><br>
OK, I know some people just don't think of that as an option, but seriously, if you're just now switching to being veg, now would be a great time to put your foot down and say "I will continue to put a filling, nutritious, and hopefully delicious meal on the table every day, but it will not have meat in it. If you want meat with your dinners, you can feel free to keep some chicken breasts and burgers in the freezer and grill one up for yourself."<br><br><br><br>
I dunno, maybe my attitude is just fundamentally different from other people. I was raised to accept the idea that the household cook has supreme authority as to what will be had for dinner on any given night, and if you don't like it, tough. I grew up under a rule of "You can eat what I feel like cooking, or you can fend for yourself." So it only seems sensible to me that if I cook for multiple members of a household, I'll apply the same rule. So I had no problem whatsoever telling my SO that I wouldn't cook meat for him anymore.</div>
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Rebel he would, too! I'm afraid that after all these years, he's pretty set in his ways. I guess I feel that it would be a little unfair to him to totally quit preparing what he likes to eat just because my diet changed. He'd take it personally if I totally quit cooking for him or tell me I'm only thinking of myself. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/rolleyes.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=":rolleyes:"> I can only hope to "teach through example", but when I'm saying it's a lost cause, I'm not kidding! He wouldn't touch the vegetables I prepare, so it would be as if I totally quit cooking for him altogether.<br><br>
I wish I would have started with that mind set from the beginning. I never enjoyed cooking, so I made a habit of asking "What do you feel like eating?" and usually went from there. I'd have eaten out every night if we could afford it. But I have to cook now and with his work schedule, I only have to include meals for him for about 10 days out of the month, so it's not too bad.
 
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