[tiggybrown]

I need to find a happy medium when cooking for this guy, he loves meat. When we first got together I loved meat and cheese with him, also I am the cooker in the house. He loved my cooking, fatty cheeses, meats, tons of cream sauces! Now I am vegan and he is having a very hard time with it, I don't blame him either, it is quite a change. I have been cooking so many Vegan dishes lately and they are good, but whenever he eats them he simply says "they are not bad" or "its okay" I am not going to lie I want to please him and I want him to be happy with what I cook (yes I am old fashioned) is there anyway to ease him into this a little easier or is there a cookbook available for omni's that are stubborn. I also have to admit that I want this to become a life change for the both of us, I would love to be in this together with him to work towards a vegan llifestyle for us and our children. I don;t know how to go about this.

 

[Michael]

I know how I'd go about it. "If you don't like what I make you're an adult and can make your own meal."

 

[madder]

You could both cook separate meals?

Or he could put cheese on his meal?

Have you tried making dishes with creamy sauces? They can help disguise the fact the dish is vegan! Like a Thai red curry with veggies? Add some defrosted frozen tofu for a bit of a 'meaty' chew. Or you could make a korma with coconut milk. Or for a 'meat and potatoes' style meal you could try marinating and grilling portabellos and serving with gravy and mashed potato.

I don't know, maybe you've tried all these things already - what would you usually cook?

 

[K*today]

I could have written that myself. Omni husband is having a slightly hard time. I give him cheese for his dinners and once or twice a week i heat up frozen meat stuff for him (like chicken nuggets or hamburgers. blech). Last night I gave him chicken nuggets and made a ton of fresh veggies to go with it. I ate all the veggies and just obstained from the meat portion of dinner. Its not my ideal situation....but its working for now. 5/7 days he eats exactly what i fix, the way i fix it. I'm still working on him

 

[garth]

Quote:

Originally Posted by tiggybrown

... I am not going to lie I want to please him and I want him to be happy with what I cook (yes I am old fashioned) is there anyway to ease him into this a little easier or is there a cookbook available for omni's that are stubborn. I also have to admit that I want this to become a life change for the both of us, I would love to be in this together with him to work towards a vegan llifestyle for us and our children. I don;t know how to go about this.

My wife and I are in a similar spot. Probably a slightly easier situation, I'm lacto-ovo and she's a omni. We had been dating for quite some time before I switched to veg*nism and it was an adjustment for us too. There are quite a few threads on this board dedicated to life in a mixed household and relationships with omni's. I'd recommend searching for them for further information -- there are a lot of good suggestions there.

As for us, we've found a good balance. We cook together. Generally, we plan meals which cover me nutritionally -- but can also be used as a side dish or a base for her meat. As an example, last night we made a stir-fry with seitan, peppers, onions and some other veggies. In another pan, she took care of the chicken and when we were dishing it out, she only took noodles and veggies but no seitan; putting her chicken onto her plate instead.

Other nights, we'll make fajitas and I'll use beans instead of meat. Or we'll make a standard meat & potatoes meal and I make tofu for myself. You just need to get creative and probably get his help in the kitchen. We used to take turns cooking. One night I'd make dinner and she'd clean up, the next night she'd make dinner and I'd clean up. When I went veg, we created a few more dirty pots & pans so we cook and clean together. It works well and give us a chance to unwind and talk together after work.

As far as getting this to be a choice he accepts for his diet, you've got your work cut out for you. You'll get a lot of different advice from different people on this board -- but mine: accept him for who he is and expect him to treat you with the same respect. If he gives you grief about your veg*nism, give him some literature to read on the subject. "Diet for a New America" is what I gave my wife after a mini-argument about my choice. She read it, took it to heart and has voluntarily cut down on her meat consumption. I doubt she'll ever be completely veg*n but it's more important that she's happy and respectful of my choice.

 

[jeezycreezy]

Put all of his meals in a deep fat fryer before serving?

Inject fat and cholesterol directly into his veins with a needle before every meal?

No?

It sounds like he's not eating very healthy and if you want to have kids with the guy then you want him to be around for a long time for your kids, right?

There's no better way to enhance your longevity than healthy eating. (And excercise.)

Maybe that's an argument you can make to help him get on board.

I dunno.

It takes most people's taste buds time to adjust to a healthier way of eating. But they do.

Hopefully he's a good enough guy that he'll put his love and respect for you ahead of his gastronomic preferences and will learn to appreciate your new style of cooking.

Good luck!

Cheers!

TJ

 

[4EverGrounded]

Seems the problem is that he loves his fatty, heavy sauces. To him, that's "good cooking" at its finest.

The solution as I see it: create vegan dishes using vegan sauces. No, they won't be as heavy or rich as the omni version but hopfully they'll hit the spot just the same.

I bet if you posted some of your omni favourites in the recipe section, there'd be tons of people willing to help you veganise those favourites.

 

[jeezycreezy]

Quote:

Originally Posted by 4EverGrounded

I bet if you posted some of your omni favourites in the recipe section, there'd be tons of people willing to help you veganise those favourites.

Please call your thread "Pimp My Dish".

 

[4EverGrounded]

I was sorta hoping you'd make that thread, TJ so you could have the privilege of giving it that title yourself.

 

[Laura_I]

When I met my husband, he was an omni and I was a vegetarian. I told him straight up that I had no problem with him eating meat, but that I wasn't going to cook it for him. I never once criticised his eating habits or lectured him, and he did the same for me. He would often try the meals I had made for myself and enjoyed them. Four patient years later, he became a vegetarian too. So long as the food that you cook is delicious, he wont have a problem with it. What I did was bought a ton of cookbooks and I tried every single recipe, building up a core of his favorites. As such, everything I now make for him, he loves and has no complaints.

 

[GhostUser]

Quote:

Originally Posted by jeezycreezy

Please call your thread "Pimp My Dish".

 

[rabid_child]

I wouldn't yet worry about a vegan future together. Right now I'd just try to get him acclaimated to new foods. Try getting a few vegan cookbooks together, and sit down with him and ask him to choose things that interest him. Maybe they are recipes that you wouldn't otherwise have made and you could work on together, even if it doesn't sound good to you at first, you may like it! And at least it would be vegan. I cook a lot of seitan for my omni bf. He loves the stuff. We don't have any meal related conflicts though. He eats veg*n at home.

 

[Thalia]

I'm thinking about when I lived with my folks and went veg. Fortunately I already cooked and often cooked their regular meals for them, so that wasn't an issue. But when my mom cooked, often she cooked the same things as before, but set aside the vegan or veg ingrediants and let me finish them up and they ate how they wanted.

Perhaps as a transition, you could continue cooking some of the same things, but he has to learn how to cook the meat or the creamy sauce portion and finish up the meal while you finish it up vegan style. It's unclear if he knows how to cook or not, if not, he needs to learn anyway. If this is a time issue, is there something he does around the house you could learn or help him with?

Like another thread on this board, this is a big relationship transition, and I think it's good that you are trying to see things from his point of view and find a way to help him while maintaining your own values.

Try the vegetarian Meat and Potatoes Vegetarian cookbook and see if any of it appeals to him. Much of it is similar to American type heary meals, most of which can be veganized.

 

[Bonoluvr]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Michael

I know how I'd go about it. "If you don't like what I make you're an adult and can make your own meal."

this is exactly what i tell my omni hubby, but since he wont do that he has been almost veggie for awhile now.

i used to cook meat for him but i stopped about a year ago.

 

[froggythefrog]

It takes some experimentation, but you can get the "cream sauce" part covered with a bit of patience and experimentation and research on the web.

Cashews in a blender with something moist like veggie broth or onions. This is a Seventh Day Adventist technique. This results in some pretty good cream sauces. Your moistener should be appropriate to how you want the sauce to taste.

Coconut milk can be used to make really good cream sauces.

As far as the huge hunks of meat he might like? Shoot, I have not found the greatest substitute for those, but I love Gardenburger Riblets. Some forms of seitan and tofu skins are good, but you might want to get him used to the idea of a vegan meal first.

 

[Tofu-N-Sprouts]

I wish the OP would come back and post some typical omni meals that her hubby liked...There's a lot of us here who could definitely offer "re-do" tips that might help.

Froggy's Cashew Cream sauce idea above is VERY effective in certain recipes. And somewhere is a killer brown-gravy recipe that Froggy makes to go with mashed taters, totally decadant and yummy!

The "stew-meat" size chunks of beef-style TVP cook up very nicely and have some of that (weird) pull-apart-but-fiberous-chewy-meaty texture that many omni's miss.

Cheese itself is a hard one to copy - maybe let that part slide for a while until he gets more accustomed to this way of eating?

 

[Marie]

It's better to pretend you can't cook so they'll cook or take you out to dinner.

 

[Bonoluvr]

Froggy can you tell us about that brown gravy recipe??

 

[garth]

Quote:

Originally Posted by froggythefrog

It takes some experimentation, but you can get the "cream sauce" part covered with a bit of patience and experimentation and research on the web.

Cashews in a blender with something moist like veggie broth or onions. This is a Seventh Day Adventist technique. This results in some pretty good cream sauces. Your moistener should be appropriate to how you want the sauce to taste.

Coconut milk can be used to make really good cream sauces.

As far as the huge hunks of meat he might like? Shoot, I have not found the greatest substitute for those, but I love Gardenburger Riblets. Some forms of seitan and tofu skins are good, but you might want to get him used to the idea of a vegan meal first.

Indian food is another good spot to look for "creamy" recipes. A love of a lot of Indian vegan dishes made with coconut milk and some of the vegetarian recipes use yogurt. You could probably subsitute soy yogurt and get a similar effect, right? I've never tried it but it's probably worth some experimentation.

I don't think it was mentioned before on this thread but another good meat substitute is seitan. It's cheap and easy to make and frankly, when marinated properly, almost fools me from time to time. Properly made it's the best meat substitute, at least in my opinion.

 

[Snow White]

Quote:

Originally Posted by garth

Indian food is another good spot to look for "creamy" recipes. A love of a lot of Indian vegan dishes made with coconut milk and some of the vegetarian recipes use yogurt. You could probably subsitute soy yogurt and get a similar effect, right? I've never tried it but it's probably worth some experimentation.

I adore Indian vegetarian food, and since eggs aren't considered "vegetarian" there, most dishes can easily be veganized. I've successfully used soy yoghurt in a braised vegetable dish before. It's not always that pretty to look at if you're not careful enough about heating it, and I think the tomato in the sauce may have slightly curdled it, but it works. I use soy yoghurt for raitas on occasion too. Plus, you can supposedly substitute tofu for paneer.