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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I'll start with a little backstory. My brother is, and always has been, two things. A very fussy eater, and a huge meat fan. A few years ago you could practically count on one hand the things he would eat; bread, ham, sausages, bacon, chips, apples. That was it. Since then, he's gotten a little better with trying new foods, and his diet has improved a bit, but he's still a little picky and quite limited.<br><br>
Except when I'm around. He's always latched on to pretty much everything I do; if I like a movie or a band, he'll like it too. If I'm having an argument with someone, he'll back me up. We've always been close, and he's always been a huge support with my vegetarianism. And for the past six months or so, he's always wanted to try whatever I'm eating. He ate some of my tofu stir-fry, and loved it. He tried mushrooms, and they're now his favourite food. He's tried loads more fruit and veg, some of which he's liked, and the meat he prefers now is at least lot less fatty.<br><br>
The problem is my mother. Every time he tries something off my plate she accuses me of trying to turn him into a vegetarian, and yells at me because it "wouldn't be good for someone with such a limited diet". She refuses to make him the new foods he likes, and instead sticks to what he used to eat all the time. On Christmas day, she had a fit at me because my brother had chosen to eat my mushroom dish rather than the pork.<br><br>
Then last week, we went to vegfest. I had initially just asked my mum to go with me, but my brother heard of the plan and asked if he could go too. I had nothing to do with his asking; I was 230 miles away from him and hadn't spoken to him about it at all. My mum seemed to think it was my "doing". But he came along anyway, and we had an amazing time. A year ago, my brother would have refused to try anything new, but he ran around vegfest eating EVERYTHING. Soy yogurt, fake meats, vegan sweets, hummus, fruit juices, and a cake that contained about six different vegetables. He SAW the vegetables being put into the cake and tried it anyway. Then he asked my mum if he could have some of the burgers. She just sat there saying things like "just because you like the food, doesn't mean you have to become a vegetarian" and "it just wouldn't be healthy for you".<br><br>
Then she turned to me and said "tell him!" I refused. I am absolutely not going to tell someone NOT to be a vegetarian/eat vegetarian food if that's what they want to do. And I think it could potentially be very healthy for him, seeing as he's eating enough now to get by on a veggie diet. And because I wouldn't tell him not to do it, my mum is now extremely angry at me, and has accused me of getting preachy and forcing my beliefs on others.<br><br>
Sorry about the rant. Just really having trouble dealing with this one. Any advice?
 

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It sounds like your mom feels threatened by your brother becoming a veg*n. Is he a minor living with her and doesn't cook his own food? Maybe she feels that it will inconvenience her to buy and prepare special veg*n food for him. If he's old enough to work, then maybe he should get a job (if he doesn't have one) and help pay for his own stuff. If he's old enough to work, he's also old enough to cook, so he could prepare his own meals so as not to inconvenience her. If it's important enough to him, he'll do it.<br><br>
It sounds like he would probably actually have a more varied diet if he went veg*n since he seems to love the food.
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>Mrs. T</strong> <a href="/forum/post/2847577"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a><br><br>
It sounds like your mom feels threatened by your brother becoming a veg*n. Is he a minor living with her and doesn't cook his own food? Maybe she feels that it will inconvenience her to buy and prepare special veg*n food for him. If he's old enough to work, then maybe he should get a job (if he doesn't have one) and help pay for his own stuff. If he's old enough to work, he's also old enough to cook, so he could prepare his own meals so as not to inconvenience her. If it's important enough to him, he'll do it.<br><br>
It sounds like he would probably actually have a more varied diet if he went veg*n since he seems to love the food.</div>
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Should probably also mention, my brother's autistic. He makes a little of his own money making music, but he doesn't have a steady job. However, my mum does get disability benefits for him, as well as money from my dad for food etc. The money isn't much of an issue, especially as the boy eats about £30 in meat alone in a week. A bit more veggie food would work out cheaper.<br><br>
He's 16, nearly 17, and so still lives at home. She cooks for him sometimes, and sometimes he cooks for himself. I don't see how it would be an inconvenience, as she's done it once before (with me), and the family never eats together anyway. She comes in from work, does my brother's food (unless he's eaten), then goes back out again, sorting her own food out much later.
 

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It sounds to me like she's not going to change her mind. Can you tell her what you have told us? Mention that you were however many miles away when you mentioned Vegfest and he wanted to go. Mention that you did NOT make him try those vegetables, he was doing it on his own. I'm sure if you mention that it makes him happy, she can't say no to that.
 
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