VeggieBoards banner
1 - 10 of 10 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,104 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
so..i hope this is just today. life has been amazing. im carefree, happy, in a great relationship, glowing, healthy, doing well at uni...but...



had an irrational freakout today. i still eat well. wholefoods but some processed crap as well, and lots of chocolate!! today i'd planned on getting takeout pizza with my friend (first time in years. its wholemeal based though!!) and was actually psyched to try it. but this morning after a huge breakfast had a craving for this massive vegan muffin. sigh. had it about 20 mins after eating. bummer. but figured it was all good, id still do the pizza, still do the not caring but maaaaaaaaaaaaaybe check calories in a muffin like that for once (all while im meant to be in class. great..)

and its all so varied, some are 700, some are 400 oh golly. but they're all a lot . and its not even 11. but what got me more, was that im ok with calories, i dont even count half the time! its just that...its BAD for you. sure, it was a vegan one, but thats like...processed ON TOP of processed pizza. and its like 88 grams carbs at once...that must do bad things with the whole GL deal. argh. when did i start caring again and how do i get the fact that i should only eat vegetables for the rest of the day to try in vain to balance out my insides and blood sugar and whatever else?? and why NOW after ive gone through HEAPS of processed food and survived
?

today..

high fibre high iron amaranth and soy bread with vegemite,

a vegan cookie

low fat (not no fat) organic yogurt and an apple, few almonds.

2 scoops of milo

ginormous vegan banana sugar muffin, soaked through the bag with all its oil.

...lunch was gonna be a chick pea dish.

..then originally 2 pieces of pizza and its all ruined. sigh.

but more to the point WHY DO I CARE? how do i stop? i didn't care. not caring was under control and now its not.


and as lame as it is, i really wanted to kick back and eat pizza with the friend and impress her. and now all ill think about is that my nice clear skin will go nuts, my body will be overloaded with salt, too much processed stuff, not enough fruit, etc etc etc.

..sorry. had to freak out.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,104 Posts
Discussion Starter · #2 ·
sigh.
i think its just fear of anything changing. gotta love that. its scary when things are crap. and scary when they're not, but for different reasons.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
12,282 Posts
I have days where I eat nothing but crap. I usually end up nauscious... but every now and then, you just have to do it
Tonight I ate a soft baked chocolate cookie with peanut butter chips before dinner... and the only reason I regretted it was because I didn't have room for one after dinner.
Tomorrow is another day.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,104 Posts
Discussion Starter · #4 ·
rabid, thanks
you're right. completely right. and thats normally the way i view it these days, and it hasn't hurt me yet!!!!!

everything will be peachy. im sure the pizza will be great.


you're splendid. xoxo
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
441 Posts
taurushead

i 'say' this with most compassion. have you considered some other form of alternative professional help? how long are you going to live in this trap?

seeing a counsellor might not be the answer, for you. why haven't your friends or family intervened? you shouldn't just post about it on here - we are not professionals.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
461 Posts
taurs...... i hear you , i still have alot of "food issues" and last night i had 2 toasted cheese melts , it freeked me out , but ya know im still alive and so are you , and you sound so much happier , stick to life , stick to looking after yourself....... honest "wholemeal" means whole , its not that prosessed and its full of fibre and b vits ........ hey hang in there
)))
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,104 Posts
Discussion Starter · #7 ·
laurie, i know. i know. thanks. but its because generally its not a problem for me anymore.

and special k , i just PMd you back but i don't think it went through.

"specialk,


thank you SO much for reaching out like that. its great to know im heard and that im not alone in this!!

its hard to remember that having a good time is more important than living for ever. and that these studies on what to eat are ONLY studies, they don't KNOW anything. they thought the world was flat originally
..so who knows how it'll turn out.

im going to have the pizza. i don't really want to. i don't feel like i deserve it, its raining here and ive been sitting on my a** all day. but what the hey, i guess.

keep it up, ok? this breif flash back to obsession has reminded me why i stopped thinking like this.
"
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,104 Posts
Discussion Starter · #8 ·
besides, when it starts to get in the way of PROVEN health stuff, ie. not getting enough calcium out of fear of sodium or something...then its time to worry.

and im not gonna let that happen. its all good. i shall survive
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,521 Posts
Quote:
Originally Posted by taurushead View Post

its scary when things are crap. and scary when they're not, but for different reasons.
Ohh, thats an interesting issue, and one that I deal with fairly regularly. Weird, isn't it? If a day goes well, without a freakout of some kind, then I freak out.

I hope you are feeling better now taurus. I'm sure your freakouts will get less and less, and while that is scarey it is good too. I'm sort of hoping for that myself. But again, with the dichotamy that you presented above, I'm still unsure about the whole thing.

I hope you're ok today.
 
1 - 10 of 10 Posts
Top