[Philostrate]

Don't you like to look people in the eye?

Are you afraid of public speaking?

Do you blush when someone talks to you?

Tell us about your shyness...

 

[misq17]

I'm usually pretty outgoing. I'm opinionated and not afraid to say what's on my mind. I'm not afraid of public speaking, but I do get nervous sometimes. As far as blushing goes, I don't really blush except if I get flustered from making a lot of mistakes at something or if I'm under a lot of pressure.

I used to be a little more shy but now I try to put myself in someone else's position and I realize that most people expect you to speak up if you have a problem or a point to make. Communication is really important to forming solid relationships.

 

[karenlovessnow]

Painfully shy...but too tired to write about it....I'll be back....

 

[Amy SF]

Very much painfully shy, most of my life. I'm not quite as shy as I was a child, thanks to the passage of time, but I'm still shy in social situations. I'm not good at small talk. I usually wait for people to address me to have conversations, and then I'm not even comfortable just chatting.

Whenever I went shopping at department stores with my mother and I needed to use the Ladies restroom, my mom would tell me to ask an employee where it was. I couldn't. I really couldn't. So my mother would have to ask for me. Nowadays, I can ask that question without thinking twice about it, but it gives you an idea of how paralyzing shyness can be, especially for a child.

 

[isowish]

I used to be totally "painfully shy" as Karen and Amy has put it. I think I've been getting better at not being so recently. I'm still not good at eye contact when talking to people, but nw I think that's mostly out of habit. I can speak up when I NEED to, I just don't enjoy it.

 

[Elena99]

I was shy until I went to University, and then I changed and became mostly unshy. I'll sometimes be shy if confronted with someone who I knew in school before Uni (unless it's someone I wasn't shy with then). It's like it takes me back to that time, and I can't handle it.

 

[queenfluff]

I was the shyest kid I knew when I was younger. I had friends in school and I wasn't shy with them. I was shy with people I didn't know every well, boys and esp. strangers and esp. adults. I am naturally a more reserved and quiet person. Too much noise can get on my nerves.

Now, I am not as shy but I still have a hard time 'chitty-chatting' with people I don't know. I am not good at small talk and I don't enjoy it. It is very rare that I will feel completely comfortable with someone new right away. With people I know, I can be pretty outgoing and direct.

I force myself to be outgoing when it comes to job related stuff. But I am too self-sufficient and rather do thing on my own than ask other people for even the slightest bit of the assistance.

Sort of like what Amy said - I would rather wander around looking for the bathroom at a store for 5 minutes than ask someone!

I hate it when salepeople bug me in stores because I don't want to have to talk to them unless it is absolutely necessary.

 

[HandcuffedAngel]

I'm obnoxious with friends, shy when I'm alone.

 

[GhostUser]

I don't consider myself to be shy at all. I'm a fairly outgoing person. Eye contact is easy for me. I do get a little nervous when I have to talk in front of a group, but it's not that bad. I think everyone gets a little nervous for stuff like that.

I do blush very easily, though.

 

[Absolut]

Not very!

 

[Bang]

I used to get really really bad social anxiety; I'd get paranoid in social situations. When I was little I was terrified of people, and had only 2 or 3 close friends that I could be myself around, but I quickly grew out of that and I'm pretty ok now. I still have some shy tendancies, like when I meet new people I'm pretty quiet, but once I get to know the person it's practically impossible to shut me up.

 

[Iria]

I am also 'painfully shy.' As I child I couldn't make phone calls at all, and I still get panicky whenever I have to call someone who's not family or not expecting me to call. I couldn't order my own food in restaurants and I actually went thirsty a few times rather than ask the waitress for more water. I would rather search a whole store or library for what I'm looking for than ask for help, and I never accept associates' offers of help. I can't make small talk. I'm always the quietest person in a group. I just kind of tag along with my friends, making a comment here or there in the conversation, and if I'm with strangers, I try to get out of the group as soon as possible or make myself invisible. I hate parties and dances, because I also just follow around the person I know best, and if they leave for the restroom I'm frozen in place until they return.

I've turned down exciting opportunities because I didn't want to experience them with a group of strangers (such as going on a trip or joining a new group by myself). I haven't gotten a job yet because I'm terrified of the application process (talking to managers, the interview, etc.). When I try to do something new (like banking), I get really uptight about embarrassing myself in front of the teller and end up embarrassing myself because I have to make it clear that I'm new and don't know what I'm doing. I still have to bring my mother to places like banks to walk me through the process, or else I do whatever I can online or through the mail.

If I could, I would do all my shopping and appointments online, so that I would never have to interact with a stranger (or drive, which is another thing I hate doing). However, I've gotten much better at this as I've grown older--when I'm shopping at a place I'm comfortable in, I can even make a little small talk with the cashier. I'm still always too nervous to count out the correct change.

Shyness is the bane of my life. In fact, I'd say what I have is closer to social anxiety, although, of course, the disorder being what it is I'd never be brave enough to see a specialist for it. I've made a lot of huge steps, though, and I've learned that I can do things on my own without dying in a puddle of embarrassment.

 

[Turtledarling]

I am definitely shy but not as shy as I used to be. I absolutely hate having to speak up in class, meeting new people, and talking to people that I don't know very well. I know deep down inside that they're are not thinking I'm a loser or harshly judging me and that it's completely irrational. I am (for the last 2yrs) roomates with an outgoing sister, I've worked at the same place for 4yrs (so that when I meet new people there it's different because I'm kinda the pro there and I feel like they look up to me a little), and just getting older is helping I think.

 

[Sevenseas]

I'm so shy that I can't even look at the floor: I blush when my eyes and the floor tiles meet.

 

[nogardsram]

I shy away from some veggies like onions, hot peppers, and eggplant.

 

[Skylark]

Ordinarily, it's not a big deal, but I still feel awkward about breaking into another person's conversation when I need to talk to them. I'll stand there and wait. It bugs me when someone else jumps into my conversation, but it happens all the time.

 

[avocado]

i tend to be very shy. i think i come off as standoffish and untrusting.

 

[Brandon]

I was very shy when I was younger, especially around girls. I worked as a barber for about 7 years and was forced to come out of my shell somewhat. I tend to be a little quiet around new people for a little while. Once I'm comfortable, I lose all the shyness.

Not that I don't still find myself at a loss for words and blushing like a dope when I am talking to a pretty lady....

 

[CoolCat]

Iria, you just described me! it sounds so much like me that its scary lol. i have been painfully shy and quiet ever since i could remember and its gotten more worst then better. I avoid people and contact with people any chance I get. and i bet i look silly following my friend every step they take at school. I never talk and only talk when i really need to. I try to make eye contact but fail. oh and public speeking, well thats one of my worst fears i dread it. its gotten to the point where i rarley leave the house. i feel like when i'm around people they are constantly watching me and not in a possitive way, pointing out everything bad about me. arghh! theres so much other stuff but i'll spare you the boredem. is this normal or not? I'm kind of exepting that my shyness is apart of me but still the other part of me hates it.

 

[Amy SF]

I always followed my mother around at social gatherings, even when it was just extended family. It finally did start to look a little ridiculous by the time I hit my mid 30's, though.

Now that I'm in my late 40's, I try not to do it so often.