[GhostUser]

When you go out for a meal with 'new' non-vegan friends, what do you usually say about why you're not having meat/dairy? How often do you use the old stand-by i'm allergic ..LoL! Will you wait until people start asking Q's or do you tip them off in advance? How often do you ask your waiter if their are any animal by-poducts in the 'dish' you want to order etc.?

 

[GhostUser]

I try the "Don't ask, don't tell" approach.

If they ask, I'll just tell them I'm a veg and use a tone of voice that lets them know that it is not open for discussion.

The "Don't ask, don't tell" approach usually works probably because due to my brown skin, everyone thinks I'm a religious Hindu which is not exactly true (I'm a Jain) but it sure is conveinent.

 

[Max Power]

I'm not vegan, so I quite often don't have to negotiate this issue. Ordering a vegetarian dish often "flies under the radar" so to speak. When it is made evident that I'm vegetarian I get on my high horse and tell everyone else how they are disgusting animals and they should be eaten.

 

[Verbivore]

I have a vegan button on my bag, so most people know when they see it. If they ask any questions, I ask them if they really want my answers, especially during meals, because some people get offended when they hear about veganism, even if they're the ones who brought it up.

 

[Thalia]

I have Rushabh's approach. I am not totally vegan, and I usually don't ask too many quesitons about animal products unless there is a good chance it's a major ingredient (EG refried beans or vegetable soup).

 

[mushroom]

If food is going to be involved, I tell people that I am a vegan and ask, "Do you know what that is?" They often say no, so I give a brief explanation. Only family has been rude about it...and they weren't too bad, compared to some of the stories that I have read here.

I have a routine that I go through with waiters/waitresses and although it probably assures me of a vegan meal, it sure takes the fun out of going out to eat...so I rarely do.

We normally travel with a cooler filled with lunch and dinner.

 

[dotnetdiva]

I have been saying I'm just trying to eat healthy - no cholesterol and saturated fat. I just find it easiest to give that explanation, although it's a much more complex and varied decision of course. Everyone, wait staff, friends, relatives, say they could never give up their meat, what about barbeques, etc... It is very frustrating, I didn't say anything about their choice, it's simply my choice. I don't want to hear why they love their meat.

A few times I have gone more indepth when they ask why, it's hard to answer because there are so many reasons to go vegan. I then fill up with a few tears while I say a few words about the way these animals have lived, the water, air, and soil we're polluting and how these precious resources are disappearing.

On the other hand, we've been getting our friends to go with us to more veg-friendly restaurants now and then.

 

[Kreeli]

i very rarely use the term "vegan" when interacting in social situations that are centered around food. i have learned it is a very charged term that turns otherwise friendly gatherings into political discussions...which more often than not ruin my meal.

instead i say that i am a "strict vegetarian". it means the same thing, really, but deals with food specifically, and that term isn't surrounded with all the other implications that "vegan" is. for instance, "strict vegetarians" eat foods that "vegans" do, but aren't quizzed incessently about whether or not their shoes are leather, or if they'd choose to save a drowning dog or a drowning baby, first.

 

[mushroom]

I have found that if I say that I am a strict vegetarian, they usually ask why...and then I am right back at vegan again. It just seems to save a step for me...

But, I can't remember getting "quizzed" most people just say something like "oh i could never do that" or "that's cool"

 

[Skylark]

During one Christmastime banquet I went to, I made the mistake of saying too much. At least, it was too much information for the person who asked. Some folks on here had suggested that a good response to, "Why are you a vegetarian?" is something like, "I don't discuss it over meals" because people tend to get more emotionally involved. I should have just told the person, "I don't discuss it over meals", but then I mentioned "people tend to get more emotionally involved then". Now, I've never met him before in my life, but he was moderately offended by that. I think he thought I was accusing him of being overly emotional about food, which wasn't what I was trying to say. I didn't know him from Adam, so how could I know whether he gets emotional about it or not?

Ah, so my advice is if you say "I don't discuss it over meals", leave it at that.

 

[LadyFaile]

normally i just tell people i'm vegan if it comes up, but i find lately i use the "strict vegetarian" angle like Kreeli, because a lot of people in this town have never heard the word vegan. but i don't mention it unless it comes up or someone asks about what i'm eating etc, it's not like you'd introduce yourself to a new person and go "hi i'm Sandra and i'm a vegan. and you?"

i don't feel the need to lie about it though and say i'm allergic cause i find part of being vegan is sharing the knowledge we have to help other people make informed decisions.

 

[Michael]

Don't ask don't tell for me either. If someone notices I'll tell them but I don't get all preech-y. They're usually the ones that push it.

 

[ObsidianZebra]

I often let people know early on that I'm vegan, just to get it out, so I don't surprise the person with it suddenly when it comes to eating out. I explain what veganism is if the person doesn't already know. I do refrain from dicussing the "why" in too much detail early on, especially if I enjoy the person's company.

 

[Kurmudgeon]

I say I'm alergic.

 

[GhostUser]

Mushroom wrote: "I have a routine that I go through with waiters/waitresses and although it probably assures me of a vegan meal"

Do you mind telling what your Questions are?

 

[Kurmudgeon]

Quote:

Originally posted by Kurmudgeon

I say I'm alergic.

Hehe, I don't really.... I was just pulling a Ms. N.

 

[Michael]

On a date I be sure she knows that I am and why. Going to dinner is the first test. If she orders a meat dish and I'm paying for it then she gets the boot. I never really say anything about it though.

 

[Baby]

I'm not too self conscious of when I let people know I'm a vegan so I can't really comment on at what point I tell them. Everyone I know knows I'm a vegan but, I just don't recall having to anticipate, or work up to sharing that information with them. People always tell me I'm the healthiest person they know, so I think that they assume it's for health reasons, and not moral reasons. Then again, perhaps they recognize my relationship to other living beings, including themselves, and know I could not possibly eat them. Who knows?

 

[Thalia]

Quote:

Originally posted by Michael

On a date I be sure she knows that I am and why. Going to dinner is the first test. If she orders a meat dish and I'm paying for it then she gets the boot. I never really say anything about it though.

Have you ever really done that?

 

[kpickell]

I'm always honest. I look for opportunities to tell people the truth about factory farms.