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3,003 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I got this as a joke in my inbox. I didn't know, really, where to put it, I just wanted to share it with you guys as it is funny, but also quite true, and sad. I know that I have felt like this many times before. The last line is the kicker.<br><br><br><br><br><br><br><br>
The Heavy Thinker<br><br><br><br>
It started out innocently enough. I began to think at parties<br><br>
now and then to loosen up. Inevitably though, one thought led<br><br>
to another, and soon I was more than just a social thinker.<br><br><br><br>
I began to think alone - "to relax," I told myself - but I knew<br><br>
it wasn't true. Thinking became more and more important to me,<br><br>
and finally I was thinking all the time.<br><br><br><br>
I began to think on the job. I knew that thinking and<br><br>
employment don't mix, but I couldn't stop myself.<br><br><br><br>
I began to avoid friends at lunch time so I could read Thoreau<br><br>
and Kafka. I would return to the office dizzied and confused,<br><br>
asking, "What is it exactly we are doing here?".<br><br><br><br>
Things weren't going so great at home either. One evening I had<br><br>
turned off the TV and asked my wife about the meaning of life.<br><br>
She spent that night at her mother's.<br><br><br><br>
I soon had a reputation as a heavy thinker. One day the boss<br><br>
called me in. He said, "Skippy, I like you, and it hurts me to<br><br>
say this, but your thinking has become a real problem. If you<br><br>
don't stop thinking on the job, you'll have to find another<br><br>
job." This gave me a lot to think about.<br><br><br><br>
I came home early after my conversation with the boss.<br><br>
"Honey," I confessed, "I've been thinking..."<br><br><br><br>
"I know you've been thinking," she said, "and I want a<br><br>
"But Honey, surely it's not that serious."<br><br><br><br>
"It is serious," she said, lower lip aquiver. "You think as<br><br>
much as college professors, and college professors don't make<br><br>
any money, so if you keep on thinking we won't have any money!"<br><br><br><br>
"That's a faulty syllogism," I said impatiently, and she began<br><br>
to cry. I'd had enough. "I'm going to the library," I snarled<br><br>
as I stomped out the door.<br><br><br><br>
I headed for the library, in the mood for some Nietzsche, with<br><br>
a PBS station on the radio. I roared into the parking lot and<br><br>
ran up to the big glass doors... they didn't open. The library<br><br>
was closed.<br><br><br><br>
To this day, I believe that a Higher Power was looking out for<br><br>
me that night.<br><br><br><br>
As I sank to the ground clawing at the unfeeling glass,<br><br>
whimpering for Zarathustra, a poster caught my eye. "Friend, is<br><br>
heavy thinking ruining your life?" it asked. You probably<br><br>
recognize that line. It comes from the standard Thinker's<br><br>
Anonymous poster.<br><br><br><br>
Which is why I am what I am today: a recovering thinker. I<br><br>
never miss a TA meeting. At each meeting we watch a<br><br>
non-educational video; last week it was "Porky's." Then we<br><br>
share experiences about how we avoided thinking since the last<br><br>
I still have my job, and things are a lot better at home. Life<br><br>
just seemed... easier, somehow, as soon as I stopped thinking.

1,983 Posts
<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>nookle</strong> <a href="/forum/post/0"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a><br><br>
Do you remember 'Flowers for Algernon'?</div>
That was an amazing book.

3,003 Posts
Discussion Starter · #5 ·
I know. We read it when I was in junior high, and I loved it. Even then, I could kind of understand how awareness sets you apart, and sets you up for loneliness.

3,003 Posts
Discussion Starter · #7 ·
<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/sick.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=":sick:"> it does.<br><br><br><br>
A customer who I was talking to while I was bartending once referred to it with the term 'Fringe dweller'. I thought this was properly descriptive.

0 Posts
I like to have two think-free days per week. Usually friday and saturday nights <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/dunce.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=":dunce:"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/smiley.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=":)"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/images/smilies/smiley.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title=":)">
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