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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
So I am in the process of finding myself. I have been through many changes over the years and now I'm discovering what parts of me need to stay the same, which parts should be changed, and what parts are brand new and need to be explored.

The whole process is really exciting but also very time consuming. It feels like I am literally growing into this new person that I never imagined myself becoming. I'm not sure that the people in my life really understand what is going on with me. It feels like I am growing apart from some people as a result of everything. But also, new people are coming into my life.

Is anyone else going through this, or gone through this before? I'm curious to hear other people's stories.
 

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Impeach the gangster
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I'm over here!
 

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Chrysalis View Post

So I am in the process of finding myself. I have been through many changes over the years and now I'm discovering what parts of me need to stay the same, which parts should be changed, and what parts are brand new and need to be explored.

The whole process is really exciting but also very time consuming. It feels like I am literally growing into this new person that I never imagined myself becoming. I'm not sure that the people in my life really understand what is going on with me. It feels like I am growing apart from some people as a result of everything. But also, new people are coming into my life.

Is anyone else going through this, or gone through this before? I'm curious to hear other people's stories.
 

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I do this a bunch. It happens more after a break up. Constant evolving, changing but always the same.
 

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Change is a part of a healthy life; we live, grow, and learn along the way.

My latest change was going vegetarian. I told my hubby yesterday that I'm not trying to be a pita about eating and even if I was, I don't care. He was giving me a hard time about not eating the rest of his salad from lunch (just pick the ham off). *blank stare* Nope, not gonna do it.
 

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I'm a pretty compulsive person with an addictive personality to match, so I go through big identity changes fairly often. I think underneath it all I remain pretty much the same. My identifying personality features have always been there like my brand of humour, my hot temper, being too blunt without meaning to, being generous etc. I'm now going through another change because for the first time I am in a serious relationship with someone I'm in love with who loves me back. I'm having to find myself as part of a "we" now. It's pretty exciting, I like it
 

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yea I (third?) the motion that I think underneath it all I always stayed the same...

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Originally Posted by earthling View Post

I'm having to find myself as part of a "we" now. It's pretty exciting, I like it
that is SO cute and awesome for you! congrats! ... sorry to hijack but awesome for you!
my "we" has stayed the same (as a core) for 6 years so far too
 

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Yeah, I'm trying to find myself. I'm not really happy or living to my full potential. I tend to be very narcissistic, pessimistic, and blunt. oh, and aggressive. XD I know it sounds stupid, but part of me is afraid to change. I'm trying, though.
 

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I'm in a bit of a "lost" phase, not a found phase. I'm between careers, my kids are grown, and I'm just not sure what I want to do with myself.
 

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Yeah, how do you find yourself? Seriously. What's the process. I could use some tips myself. I'm a bit lost & don't know how to find answers. I'm not sure what to do about certain things in my life. Suggestions?
 

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Discussion Starter · #15 ·
thanks for all the responses! I'm glad to see that I'm not the only one going through this, even if it is different for each one of us.

I have the opposite situation as Earthling, since I am recently single after having a long-term relationship and I'm remembering how it feels to just be myself exactly as I want to be without trying to compromise anything for the "we" that I used to be part of. I suspect that I never really knew myself that well to begin with before dating him, and in the process of slowly finding myself, became more and more unhappy with the relationship as I realized just how different we were. Well now I am free to be myself completely and find someone else who is a better match for me. Of course I am still not ready to date anyone yet. I want to take this time to get my head on straight.
 

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Discussion Starter · #16 ·
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Originally Posted by rashelle View Post

Yeah, how do you find yourself? Seriously. What's the process. I could use some tips myself. I'm a bit lost & don't know how to find answers. I'm not sure what to do about certain things in my life. Suggestions?
Something that helped me immensely was reading Julia Cameron's book The Artist's Way. It is a 12 week program that you follow by doing writing exercises and "artist dates". It is meant to help you to find your inner artist. For me though I found it helped me to realize who I really am deep down inside, and what do I really want out of my life?

I also like to sit down every once in a while and write something called "I am" and "I am not". On one side of a sheet of paper, writing on every line, you write "I am" statements. Write about who you are, what you do, what sort of person you are. Then on the reverse side of the paper, do the same thing but with "I am not". You can also do this with other things like "I want" and "I don't want". Don't censor yourself, as nobody will be reading it afterwards but you. I don't know if I explained that very well (hopefully that makes sense?) but I find that writing stuff out like that helps me to realize what I really want.
 

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Quote:
Originally Posted by New England Vegan View Post

I'm a few months away from turning 40 so, yes, I've been going through a process of examining my whole life.
I feel the same way.....I am gonna be 37 in June and have been doing the same thing....and going from there.

Peace
 
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