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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Being vegan now I feel like I am getting major disapproval all around me. Wrinkled noses, rolled eyes, objections, challenges, scrutinized, "just a phase", and people seem to get so pissed off about it!

Why are they all so angry what I do with my health and what I chose to eat? What is it to them? I've made a point to not preach to friends and family, I have not once, but just being vegan makes me out to be preachy to them. People automatically get defensive- its amazing!

Nobody complained all the time I was vegetarian! Why now that I am vegan is it rubbing everyone the wrong way?
I never criticized anyone for being vegan that I have come across, in fact I always felt happy for them and envious of their commitment. I guess I am few and far between in that thinking out there.

How do you all cope with the rejection? Its not easy to change from being vegetarian to vegan, I have been doing this 3 weeks- not a single animal product and I am so proud of myself. Nobody feels proud of me- they don't like me anymore! Its hard to push yourself when you face all that criticism for something you feel is right.

I guess I just needed to vent and maybe need reassurance from like minded people.
 

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I used to feel that vegans were silly, until I came to this site.

people just don't see farm animals' point of view, and feel judged by vegans, for doing something that nearly everyone does.
 

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Sorry you're dealing with this. I've actually experienced the opposite. My family, friends, and co-workers have all been incredibly supportive. They don't really "get" it, but they try to make sure there are vegan options at any meal I'm invited to and they've generally just been really great about it. (I'm very lucky to have a family that supports each other about most things.) I get the occasional, confused look if the topic comes up, but it's really been the exception rather than the rule. I think it probably makes a big difference that I'm in my mid-40s and a fairly steady and sensible individual, so no one is going to say that I'm "going through a phase."

Don't look to anyone else to understand what you're doing or even feel good about it. I think being proud of yourself is plenty. This is about you, and your beliefs. Hang in there!
 

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Tell them to stop preaching to you about being preachy. Remind them that you have not said one thing to them. All you did was make a decision for yourself. You didn't take anything away from them. They need to stop being so judgemental in assuming that you're judging them.
 

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Quote:
Originally Posted by mollycakes View Post

Nobody complained all the time I was vegetarian! Why now that I am vegan is it rubbing everyone the wrong way?
I found that happened to me when I became a vegan.
I did get a few ignorant comments when I was vegetarian too actually though.
 

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Take a deep breath, smile, and either pointedly change the topic or tell them it's none of their business (depending on how annoying they're being and how polite you're feeling!).
 

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Discussion Starter · #7 ·
This was totally prompted by what happened with my FB status today. I wrote "3 weeks vegan today!" and not one positive comment. Just ridicule and jokes and negativity. I had a negative reaction from my family at a family party, and some friends have been giving looks and wrinkled noses so far, and that was ok, but I didn't expect this today.
 

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Quote:
Originally Posted by mollycakes View Post

This was totally prompted by what happened with my FB status today. I wrote "3 weeks vegan today!" and not one positive comment. Just ridicule and jokes and negativity. I had a negative reaction from my family at a family party, and some friends have been giving looks and wrinkled noses so far, and that was ok, but I didn't expect this today.
I'd probably say, "All I did was make a comment about MYSELF. Why all the hate?"

Either that or I'd just delete all the negative comments and leave a status message like, "All nasty comments will be deleted from here on out. Don't like it? Unfriend me."
 

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Discussion Starter · #9 ·
I guess I'm wondering also if this is common, something any of you go through? Maybe it is an initial reaction from my friends and maybe they just accept it eventually? I hope so. I'm bummed.
 

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First of all great job on making it three weeks, those are the hardest to get through
Second, this happens and is unfortunately part of the lifestyle, I get criticized all the time. It doesn't help that I'm naturally petite but people blame veganism as the cause; which it isn't. After a few months your friends and family may adapt to your new lifestyle and be less criticizing
 

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Congrats on making it for 3 weeks! I'm getting there slowly so I'm not having these difficulties BUT my parents are looking into buying a restaurant and I suggested that they put on more vegetarian options (there's only one a day at the moment, and it doesn't change at all) and to also put some vegan options on the menu if they do buy it, but they just turned up their noses and basically asked why we would do that.

Just tell them that you won't be accepting negative comments on your facebook page. It's not something that's nice to see.
 

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Im proud of you! This happened to me a little in the beginning but it wasnt bad and FB didnt exisit or anything like that so people had to talk to me to find out. I think people KNOW what they are doing is wrong and their anger is a reflection of how they feel about themselves. Now I get the same crap for being fit. People dont like it when you are being the best you you can be.
 

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Congratulations on hitting your three-week milestone! You have every right to be proud of yourself. As for the people who feel the need to criticize you, I probably wouldn't delete their comments, but I would remind them of every mama's favorite rule:
"If you can't say something nice...then don't say anything at all."
 

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Bright Bird View Post

Congratulations on hitting your three-week milestone! You have every right to be proud of yourself. As for the people who feel the need to criticize you, I probably wouldn't wouldn't delete their comments, but I would remind them of every mama's favorite rule:
"If you can't say something nice...then don't say anything at all."
Yes, you could just comment back with that. Hopefully they would feel like A holes.
 

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Quote:
Originally Posted by mollycakes View Post

This was totally prompted by what happened with my FB status today. I wrote "3 weeks vegan today!" and not one positive comment. Just ridicule and jokes and negativity. I had a negative reaction from my family at a family party, and some friends have been giving looks and wrinkled noses so far, and that was ok, but I didn't expect this today.
Friend me! I'll say nice things.


Quote:
Originally Posted by veganmama884 View Post

Yes, you could just comment back with that.
 

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friend me too! I will def say only nice, positive things! If you want to I will take down my crazy security settings LOL
 

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don't know what it is about the term vegan that people react to. i recently went vegetarian and some people think its cool most don't. i asked someone who was being negative about it to say something nice and all they could say was "at least your not vegan".

just be happy in your self that you have changed your lifestyle because of what you believe and to me that can never be a bad thing.
 

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My mother opposed me, my father opposed me, my step-mother got all up in my face about it. I know how you feel. It was pretty hard for me being Vegetarian, then eventually Vegan. It still is pretty hard. I deal with it because I just have that kind of personality where I don't let people mess with me, I basically have the "don't f*** with me" way of thinking, so when they ever gave me a problem about it, I put them in their place with their tails between their legs. But I promise you that it will get easier, they are just threatened by you because they don't understand you. Eventually you'll grow a huge immunity to being put down about Veganism. This may sound cheesy but, you'll get stronger and be able to deal with it, it'll never be easy though, just easier.
 

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Discussion Starter · #20 ·
Awww thats sweet of you - I would love vegan FB friends. PM me.

I deleted my status because it got out of hand. A vegan friend of mine (I have 1) saw what was going on and got into it with some of my friends (she is feisty!) and it was just stupid and out of control.
I'm embarrassed about the whole thing. Gah- I was just patting myself on the back and coming out to my friends that I was vegan. I guess I learned my first real life vegan lesson: People don't like vegans.

I'm wondering if in the future I should just keep quiet about it - in social situations- just quietly pick at the food and not bring it up. I had no idea how badly people feel about it. Maybe its the city I'm from. I need to move somewhere more granola and make more granola friends I guess. I never expected this kind of a reception at all. Sucks. I thought the world was more forward thinking.
 
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