I'm sick and tired of this. I want to be better and I want it now. I'm <i>angry</i> that I can't control this even though I realize it's not my fault. But I have no intention to go to my therapist in a week's time and grovel at her feet to please fix me. Talk to someone, that's find and dandy. But at this rate I'm going to be hospitalized and destroying my future before I have half a clue.<br><br><br><br>
Thank you <i>so</i> much for all the support in the other thread. It's you guys that keep me trying to be strong. I know that there's no way I can get better in a day, but I'm going to try to recover- I've been letting this thing pull me down without even fighting back. I'm stronger than that.<br><br><br><br>
Is there anyone around (preferably with AIM/MSN?) that could help me plan out a few <i>realistic</i> days of eating that I could attempt to follow (or even just some basic idea of what you eat from day to day!)? I need to be kept accountable somewhere or there's no way I'll be able to stay on the bandwagon. I've barely even eaten today and still feel fat (and I want the effing scale OUT of my home- I wish I could fling it out the window. Unfortunately, my dad is dieting- which of course really helps- and my family is oblivious, so there's no chance of that happening.). But I'm willing to try if someone can just give me a little push.<br><br><br><br>
To start things off, I'm going to make my favourite soup and a PB&J sammich for dinner. Both are kind of 'safe' foods for me, especially if I measure everything, but they're much better than a dinner of raw veggies and orange juice. And then I am going to have something to eat (including actually calories!) before bed, instead of telling myself I'll gain 10lbs by morning if I let things slide that bad. I have permission to eat, you told me so and I believe you. I'm going to feel awful and fat but I'm going out after tea with friends to take my mind off it, and I'm going to journal and NOT refer to 'fat' as the way I feel. I'm at a healthy weight. I want a future.<br><br><br><br>
Please give me a hand? If I have help I know I can make it.<br><br><br><br>
I want to kick this thing so hard it won't know what hit it.
Thank you <i>so</i> much for all the support in the other thread. It's you guys that keep me trying to be strong. I know that there's no way I can get better in a day, but I'm going to try to recover- I've been letting this thing pull me down without even fighting back. I'm stronger than that.<br><br><br><br>
Is there anyone around (preferably with AIM/MSN?) that could help me plan out a few <i>realistic</i> days of eating that I could attempt to follow (or even just some basic idea of what you eat from day to day!)? I need to be kept accountable somewhere or there's no way I'll be able to stay on the bandwagon. I've barely even eaten today and still feel fat (and I want the effing scale OUT of my home- I wish I could fling it out the window. Unfortunately, my dad is dieting- which of course really helps- and my family is oblivious, so there's no chance of that happening.). But I'm willing to try if someone can just give me a little push.<br><br><br><br>
To start things off, I'm going to make my favourite soup and a PB&J sammich for dinner. Both are kind of 'safe' foods for me, especially if I measure everything, but they're much better than a dinner of raw veggies and orange juice. And then I am going to have something to eat (including actually calories!) before bed, instead of telling myself I'll gain 10lbs by morning if I let things slide that bad. I have permission to eat, you told me so and I believe you. I'm going to feel awful and fat but I'm going out after tea with friends to take my mind off it, and I'm going to journal and NOT refer to 'fat' as the way I feel. I'm at a healthy weight. I want a future.<br><br><br><br>
Please give me a hand? If I have help I know I can make it.<br><br><br><br>
I want to kick this thing so hard it won't know what hit it.