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I want to ask a question without getting into a looong story. I'm not sure if it's going to make sense.
A few years ago, one of my friends hurt me (and to make it more complicated, hurt another friend worse at the same time) quite badly and I, along with several other friends, broke off all communication with her.
I've now come to peace with it, and am considering writing her a letter telling her how I feel. If I don't, chances are I'll never see her again, and she'll go through the rest of her life thinking I hate her, but on the plus side, I won't have to communicate with her or bare my soul to her (when I know she would never do the same to me, i.e., write an apology).
I actually wrote the letter, but I can't decide if I should send it. The person she really hurt still hasn't forgiven her, and while I know it's my perogative how I feel about my former friend, it seems awkward to say "I forgive you" when the real victim hasn't. And, like I said before, this girl would never do the same if our situations were reversed.
Although what she did was awful, she did not, oddly enough, do it with the intent of making us angry, and I know it hurt her when we turned our backs on her. I'm very uncomfortable with showing my emotions, and sending a letter like this would be a big deal. I can't decide what would make me more uncomfortable: letting my former friend continue to think I'm angry, or making peace with someone who doesn't really deserve it. What do you think? I'll share more details if you want to know.
A few years ago, one of my friends hurt me (and to make it more complicated, hurt another friend worse at the same time) quite badly and I, along with several other friends, broke off all communication with her.
I've now come to peace with it, and am considering writing her a letter telling her how I feel. If I don't, chances are I'll never see her again, and she'll go through the rest of her life thinking I hate her, but on the plus side, I won't have to communicate with her or bare my soul to her (when I know she would never do the same to me, i.e., write an apology).
I actually wrote the letter, but I can't decide if I should send it. The person she really hurt still hasn't forgiven her, and while I know it's my perogative how I feel about my former friend, it seems awkward to say "I forgive you" when the real victim hasn't. And, like I said before, this girl would never do the same if our situations were reversed.
Although what she did was awful, she did not, oddly enough, do it with the intent of making us angry, and I know it hurt her when we turned our backs on her. I'm very uncomfortable with showing my emotions, and sending a letter like this would be a big deal. I can't decide what would make me more uncomfortable: letting my former friend continue to think I'm angry, or making peace with someone who doesn't really deserve it. What do you think? I'll share more details if you want to know.