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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Hi all. I have been lurking a while but haven't posted yet. So here goes my first...

I decided to go veg a couple months ago. Been teetering back and forth over it but finally for my health I decided to just jump and go for it. I live across the country from my family my hubby is Navy) so I really have had no reason to tell anyone.

My issue is DH's family. They are huge meat eater. Really our whole home town is. They sell tri-tip and and tri-tip sandwiches in every parking lot over the summer and there are no veg friendly restaurants or anything. DH's family LOVES meat. Not having meat during a meal is just this horrible terrible thing to them. I figured I would avoid saying anything as long as possible (guess I'm a chicken. LOL)

But they will be here over Easter for about a week and a half. SO I am figuring it is going to come up somewhere. Especially since my MIL is making Easter dinner and even the veggie stuff is made with chicken broth and such.

Does anyone have this problem? What did you do? How do you handle the rude comments? I KNOW they are coming. I will of course be offering to make my own dishes. I won't make MIL have to learn new recipes just for me. I just know that comments are going to made. And sort of in a joking manner but I haven't had to deal with it.

I don't want to have to explain myself and have a debate. Aah. What do I do?
 

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Be proud of your choice to go Veg*an! Whether you did it for health or not, the added bonus of saving animal lives is a noble gain. Do not fear telling others, especially the family. You may get some negativity, but if everyone backed down from difference due to the possible negativity that results, our world would be quite dull and in trouble.

If the family can not accept the choice that you have made, simply make sure that they know why you are doing it, and make sure that they know that you will not waver in your beliefs. Keep strong, and do not mind what others think. You are you. Be yourself and ignore the nasty behavior - if any - that results.
 

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Well you must ring them now and then

You could , when you are in the middle of a "happy " conversation just drop in , one line

"Oh by the way I have decide to give up meat and I will bring a dish over on easter for all to try ".

Then see the response ,You can tell them because of your health you are felling better of it .They can then have a good old yak behind your back and time to get over it , when you hang up....some are surprising supportive some you have to work on a bit most come around . But in the end its there problem if they don't .

I can under stand trying to keep the harmony but not compromising your . choice of diet

If it all starts to turn to custard drop us a line , some one would have been through the same scenario and might be able to offer some support

'
 

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First, you should educate yourself. Know the facts so that you can answer intelligently when you get the well-meaning questions/comments like, "Where do you get your protein?"

Second, refuse to engage when people are hostile. Just say, "This is a personal decision that has nothing to do with you, and I would prefer not to discuss it. Please pass the bread."

I usually let people be "funny" to a point. If they keep it up too long, the eye roll with the "Ohhh, I've NEVER heard that one before" (note the dripping sarcasm) usually shuts them up.
 

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I also had worries about becoming a vegetarian in a family of meat eaters. I thought that I couldn't take the leap of going vegetarian when my family,huband, and friends were all major meat eaters. I made the choice when I couldn't tolerate eating meat anymore. While our friends and family were shocked, over time they became to accept my vegetarian lifestyle, and have supported me in it. I take the stance when mentioning that I'm a vegetarian, that It's a personal choice that I've chosen to make, and if you accept it fine, if not I'll still respect your opinions regardless. I tell them that it's not right for everyone, but it was the right decision for myself. I will prep and cook meat (even though it grosses me out), but I won't eat it. It's a comprimise that has worked well for me. I don't make a big deal out of it. If we have friends over, I will usually cook the main meat course as normal, but will prep extra veggies for myself. It works well for myself. Everyone will be surprised, however it's how you go about telling them that will make the difference. Don't back down from your decision to become vegan just to keep your family happy. It is the right decision for you, and that's the most important thing.
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
Thanks. It helps to talk to others who understand.

It helps a lot that my husband is super supportive. Although he likes his meat too much to go all veg he has taken time to listen to what I have to say to read and study things to understand it. And he likes to cook so he spent time looking up veg*an recipes that he thinks he'll like. He's said he will cut his meat consumption and when he does eat meat he'll cook it himself. (he really can't go veg if he wanted to either, he's in the Navy and in the middle of the ocean at least 6 months out of the year, they don't cook special meals for the sailors) But he is extremely supportive. He just asked me not to take chicken from our son. LOL. He's 14 months and really loves his chicken nuggets (which I make myself in a much healthier way then McD's) Plus right now he is being picky and won't eat half the foods I give him. BUT he does not like red meat of any kind. So maybe he'll be veg on his own. LOL.

Anyway thanks everyone.
 

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When I have a holiday dinner to go to. I fix up a nice vegan friendly plate for myself and a lactoova plate for my sister. Then we just microwave at the place and eat with everyone else. They like to see what I have and I usually get compliments.


Just say, "I'm on a special diet. It's not about the food anyway. I'm here to see family." And I always compliment what they are eating. Even if it's meat I say "Your food looks wonderful." And I make sure to thank them for inviting me and all. They usually understand.
 

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Try giving your son Boca brand fake chicken nuggets. They're vegan, and one of the few fake meats I like. I bet he can't tell the difference. Even if he eats real chicken nuggets when he's out at restaurants, just think of how many chickens you can save by not buying them for him at home.

As for dealing with the rest of the family, I'm kind of in a similar situation right now. I've only been veg a couple of months now, and I don't live near my family. Being the good Jewish family that we are, I'll be going to visit them over Easter weekend. We're just taking advantage of the long weekend, since my sister and her sons having Good Friday off from work/school. So I'm heading up from Florida, and my sister and kids are coming down from Chicago, and we're converging on my dad's house in Memphis.

I've told my sister and dad that I've gone vegetarian, and they seemed to react ok to it, but it might be different spending 4 days with them at my dad's house. My family's mostly pretty open-minded and liberal, but my dad tends to be more judgemental than he wants to admit.

I also don't know how much I should say in front of my nephews. I know they're animal lovers, so if I talk about why I went veg in front of them, I'm likely to convert them, much to the chagrin of their parents. When they're older, I'm sure I'll talk to them about it, but at 6 and 7 years old, it's not really my place to be talking them into disagreeing with their parents about things.

--Fromper

 
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