Amateurs.
Try having braces
and canker sores. Or cold sores that hurt so bad that they keep you up all night even though you're on vicadin for jaw surgery.
(
No offense meant. But if I ever get into a mouth pain competition, I'll win.)
This smiley seems appropriate.
I don't know if it's vegetarian, but I use this stuff called Oragel (I don't know if that's the brand name or the name of the product) that works wonders for numbing the mouth. With really bad pain it has to be applied often, but it's worth it when the pain is driving you insane.
A more simplistic method of pain relief is just to distract yourself. A big problem with canker sores is that you want to poke them with your tongue, and you just sit there and think about how much it hurts. If you can get your mind on just about anything else, the pain will lessen considerably.