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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
What can I say to my omni husband who thinks I'm going to "brainwash" (his word) our kids into not eating meat/dairy? I mean, isn't it just as much brainwashing to make them eat it?! I want to talk with him soon (again) about having my 9 1/2 year old eat vegan at home & raise our 8 month old baby as vegan & need some more ideas regarding what to say. I'm worried he's going to push to have the kids eat meat (no matter what I say) & of course they want to be like daddy.
 

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Quote:
Originally Posted by rashelle View Post

What can I say to my omni husband who thinks I'm going to "brainwash" (his word) our kids into not eating meat/dairy? I mean, isn't it just as much brainwashing to make them eat it?! I want to talk with him soon (again) about having my 9 1/2 year old eat vegan at home & raise our 8 month old baby as vegan & need some more ideas regarding what to say. I'm worried he's going to push to have the kids eat meat (no matter what I say) & of course they want to be like daddy.
Are you still married?
 

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That's a tough position right there ... Good luck with it!!!
I suggest explaining to him that wanting the best healthy lifestyle for both of your kids is not BRAIN WASHING. :/
I'm guessing you came to him telling him you want to raise your kids as compassionate as possible. Most men, unfortunately ( from what i've seen... except for men on these boards
) don't give a hoot about animals and think eating animal meat is MANLY.
I'm guessing you have a baby boy and he's all defensive about his new born son's manhood

So, tell him an argument from a different angle: HIS KIDS HEALTH
Surely, no man wants his kids to be unhealthy, stuffed with hormones, pesticides, carcinogenic ingredients, with a weak immune system!!
This only shows that a MOTHER, you, is doing the best she can to make sure her kids grow up to be healthy. No man can take this away from a woman
 

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Tell him to watch the documentary Jesus Camp.
Then he'll know what real brainwashing is.
Regardless, can you make a compromise of some sort? Raise your children NOT eating omni, explaining to your children why you live this lifestyle, and at an informed age (your 9 1/2 y.o. may fall under this), they can make their own decision with their lifestyle.

It's really up to you and your husband, so try giving a compassionate (not attacking) argument, and hope that he respects your ideals.
Best of luck!
 

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Frankly, I think the real brainwashing would be to teach kids eating decaying corpses is healthy and nutritious. It's not, period.

ETA: I imagine if I were in your position, that's about all I'd say on the matter. If that didn't settle it, I'd bust out stuff like this:

Quote:
It is the position of the American Dietetic Association that appropriately planned vegetarian diets, including total vegetarian or vegan diets, are healthful, nutritionally adequate, and may provide health benefits in the prevention and treatment of certain diseases. Well-planned vegetarian diets are appropriate for individuals during all stages of the life cycle, including pregnancy, lactation, infancy, childhood, and adolescence, and for athletes.
The End.
 

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I really hope you dont take offence, but i think it should be a personal choice.. if you raise your kids as "not allowed to eat this" they will either be picked on or feel like theyre missing out and do it anyway. Install good values in them but dont force them.
 

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Discussion Starter · #7 ·
My 9 year old's father & I are divorced, but he sees him in the summer. He's omni (same as my current husband & 8 month old's father), so I know when my older boy goes to visit him he's likely to eat meat. I obviously can't do anything about that, but I want him to understand the facts & be more compassionate & hopefully make the right choices.

Equi, I agree that my older boy is old enough to make his own choice, but I don't think that I should provide meat for him anymore. That's giving the wrong message. I will definitely try the compassionate & children's health angles. I never really thought about it all from a perspective of meat eating being seen as manly. I do have boys, so perhaps that explains some of it. I wonder if my husband would feel differently about raising a daughter veg?! Probably.
 

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I'd suggest working out solid compromises with both fathers. It's so hard on kids when the rules change halfway through the game.
 

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Discussion Starter · #9 ·
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Originally Posted by delicioso View Post

I'd suggest working out solid compromises with both fathers. It's so hard on kids when the rules change halfway through the game.
That's true. That's why I'm hoping things will be easier with the younger one since I'm vegan mostly from his birth, unlike with the older one. We'll see, though. I asked my husband about the seeing meat eating as masculine issue & he said that is one of his issues with it. He doesn't want our boys to be viewed as weak.
 

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Don't try to convince him it's not brainwashing; just start brainwashing him

Kidding, of course.
What you want to do is educate him.

Have him read this: http://www.pcrm.org/health/veginfo/v..._children.html which says:
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Eating habits are set in early childhood. Choosing a vegetarian diet can give your childand your whole familythe opportunity to learn to enjoy a variety of wonderful, nutritious foods.

Children raised on fruits, vegetables, whole grains, and legumes grow up to be slimmer and healthier and even live longer than their meat-eating friends. It is much easier to build a nutritious diet from plant foods than from animal products, which contain saturated fat, cholesterol, and other substances that growing children can do without. As for essential nutrients, plant foods are the preferred source because they provide sufficient energy and protein packaged with other health-promoting nutrients such as fiber, antioxidant vitamins, minerals, and phytochemicals.
And have him read this: http://www.eatright.org/about/content.aspx?id=8357
which says:
Quote:
It is the position of the American Dietetic Association that appropriately planned vegetarian diets, including total vegetarian or vegan diets, are healthful, nutritionally adequate, and may provide health benefits in the prevention and treatment of certain diseases. Well-planned vegetarian diets are appropriate for individuals during all staglife cyclees of the , including pregnancy, lactation, infancy, childhood, and adolescence, and for athletes.
And perhaps this list of vegetarian resources from the USDA: http://fnic.nal.usda.gov/nal_display...ment_default=0
 

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UGgh! I HATE that word just bekuz im vegan I hear it allll the freaking time from my sister an brother in law when I make my nephews or neice lunch with some of my stuff,they nit pic at me an throw stupid crap at me like "Dont brain wash our kids".I dont see anything BRAINWASHY teaching ur kids about eating healthy and animal friendly.
 

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Originally Posted by rashelle View Post

I asked my husband about the seeing meat eating as masculine issue & he said that is one of his issues with it. He doesn't want our boys to be viewed as weak.
OMG i knew it! *RANT* Every guy i talked to in real life about veg*nism said the same d*mn thing! RAWR!!!!! ; _ ;
 

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Originally Posted by rashelle View Post

That's true. That's why I'm hoping things will be easier with the younger one since I'm vegan mostly from his birth, unlike with the older one. We'll see, though. I asked my husband about the seeing meat eating as masculine issue & he said that is one of his issues with it. He doesn't want our boys to be viewed as weak.
How is it weak to not want to kill animals to eat? To show love and respect to ALL creatures. Ask him that one.
 

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Discussion Starter · #14 ·
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Originally Posted by Carley View Post

How is it weak to not want to kill animals to eat? To show love and respect to ALL creatures. Ask him that one.
I think maybe guys see being nice to animals as feminine.
He has said that he wouldn't want to kill the animals themselves & that he wants to remain ignorant & just not think about the suffering of animals. Plus, he thinks that their suffering is worth it so that he can enjoy his cheesecake or whatever he wants to eat!!!

I've tried to explain how veg*n food is healthier for him & our kids, not just more compassionate, but he doesn't seem to care about that either. He seems to think that everything is okay in moderation & that the kids will be fine as long as they exercise! He just wants to eat (& let the kids eat) whatever he thinks tastes good regardless of anything else. He told me that the quality of life is more important than the length of it. I brought up the point that meat & dairy decreases the quality of life (disease, etc.), but it just didn't seem to matter to him either. I'm so exasperated!
 

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Originally Posted by rashelle View Post

My 9 year old's father & I are divorced, but he sees him in the summer. He's omni (same as my current husband & 8 month old's father), so I know when my older boy goes to visit him he's likely to eat meat. I obviously can't do anything about that, but I want him to understand the facts & be more compassionate & hopefully make the right choices.
Can I share a true story?
My sister and her ex share custody of my nephew. My sister is vegetarian and her ex is omni. They had the same issue except that my sister gave in and just let my nephew be omni until he was old enough to "choose." If it had just been that, then I'm sure he would have stayed omni.

However, my nephew spent some time with my mom and with me. We made sure to explain to him why we were vegetarian. When he was about 6 he decided he wanted to go vegetarian, but that didn't last. He got a lot of pressure from his dad's side of the family to stay omni. But about a year later I took him to Farm Sanctuary where he met some farm animals and learned about factory farming. He decided he wanted to give vegetarianism another try. This time it stuck! He's been vegetarian now for about 4 years and I see no turning back. The kid is committed to it.

So the moral of the story is that even if you can't raise your kids vegetarian, you can still instill the concepts of respecting life and you can show them how to be vegetarian. It's just important to have really honest conversations with them about it - age appropriate discussions where you can explain that vegetarianism and veganism benefit animals, the planet, and human health.

Quote:
Originally Posted by rashelle View Post

I asked my husband about the seeing meat eating as masculine issue & he said that is one of his issues with it. He doesn't want our boys to be viewed as weak.
A lot of men get this. In fact, there's going to be a seminar about veganism in May just for men. Here is the website: http://vegansinvegas.com/

Here are some "manly" things about being vegan:
- robust health and sexual vitality
- standing up for what's right and protecting the innocent
- fighting for freedom and justice (for animals and future generations of humans)

Quote:
Originally Posted by rashelle View Post

I've tried to explain how veg*n food is healthier for him & our kids, not just more compassionate, but he doesn't seem to care about that either. He seems to think that everything is okay in moderation & that the kids will be fine as long as they exercise! He just wants to eat (& let the kids eat) whatever he thinks tastes good regardless of anything else. He told me that the quality of life is more important than the length of it.
Well, he's right.
A diet that contains very few animal products is not much different health-wise than a diet that contains zero animal products. And exercise does go a long way in the prevention of many diseases. However, if he's talking about eating animal products at every meal or even everyday, then he needs to look up the word "moderation" in the dictionary.

Maybe you can begin with a compromise that includes Meatless Mondays and something like Vegan Till Dinner. If your family only has animal products at one meal per day, that's a lot healthier and a lot more compassionate than the Standard American Diet.

About quality of life: he's got a point. Quality of life is more important than quantity. Just ask layer hens and dairy cows who live longer lives than broiler chickens or beef cattle yet are forced to endure tremendous suffering on factory farms.

There are quality of human life issues involved in veganism as well. There are human rights issues, there's the issue of environmental destruction and water pollution, the issue of anti-microbial overuse (antibiotics and anti-virals), and more.

Have you shown him this video?
http://vimeo.com/13317130
 

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@ElaineV GREAT VIDEO !!! thanks for sharing!
 

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Discussion Starter · #17 ·
Good points! I wonder what hubby's definition of moderation is! I don't think it's accurate.

Thanks for posting the video!
 

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I am fortunate enough that my husband doesn't put this as a masculine and feminine issue. Its an environmental, ethnic and dietary issue not the other issues. If we have children they will be mostly Vegeterian.
 

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Does your husband know what's in the meat he eats? Antibiotics, hormones, etc! Our intestines are too long to be eating meat & we should not be consuming the milk of other animals. Does he know what's really in cow's milk?
 

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Discussion Starter · #20 ·
Yes, I've told my husband what is in meat & dairy, but he just jokes about it. Tonight, he even said (referring to giving up eating meat), "It's not worth it." What?????!!!!!! It's not worth the lives of millions of animals, our environment, our health.....?????!!!!!! He said that we all, including the animals, are going to die anyway. I said that we should avoid suffering in the meantime. What kind of man did I marry, though?! Where's the compassion? I wasn't veg before we married, but now that I have more information, I am because I don't want to just ignore the problem and pretend that it doesn't exist like he says he wants to do. Well, he can make his own decision to consume what he wants, but he will have to stop making disparaging remarks about veganism to me and in front of our kids. I don't want THEM brainwashed into thinking meat & dairy is healthy and that it's bad to make healthy choices.
 
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