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Discussion Starter · #1 · (Edited)
I've suffered with anorexia for many many years. And was in recovery for the past 3 years. I became a vegan (finally!) in January. Sadly, unknown to me at the time I started to slip into a relapse a few months after the switch to being vegan.

I strongly believe the two are NOT linked. And I became a vegan as I was sure that what I had cut out of my diet I would replace with an alternative. This is true, I do replace.

I know the trigger and it isn't veganism.

The reason I am making this post is that I am struggling a lot.
I will be hungry and craving food and annoyingly the food I want is cruel, harmful and death related. I saw a guy eating an egg sandwich and I drooled. I like the taste of egg but I DO NOT WANT IT. It is cruel and not ethical.
I crave chicken too. And instantly my mind pops up a picture of the chickens I helped to look after at the sanctuary and I get annoyed at myself for wanting it.

I tell myself it is just an old thought process that stems back from my pre vegan days. Habitual thoughts I guess.

But it us hard to cope with. I am scared that I will give in and eat something that I will end up beating myself up over.

I have foods I can eat, within the limits of my anorexia. But the desire for cruelty based foods is bullying my mind.

I do not want to ever eat animals or their by products ever again, it makes me feel ill to think about it.


Help!
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 · (Edited)
Wow, thank you so much for your reply. It really made sense. I will read it again and in bits so I can take it in better.

I do have vegan 'treats' I love Vbite sausages and other meat alternatives. It is what I have with the that makes the whole intake restrictive. My calorie intake is low and what you says makes sense, that my body is just wanting foods and it is foods I would have turned to in the past.

I want to get my mind to crave other things... marinated tofu would be a good start! But other easy to go to foods.
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
I have recently started treatment. It is hard as I don't want to have to explain my veganism to them and the fear I have is that they will think it is an ED behaviour.

I also have a happy box, which I should open up more often!

I am currently doing a food diary and when I see my keyworker week we will do a meal plan, hopefully this will help widen my nutrients a bit more as I am stuck on the same foods right now :/

I guess the hard work has begun, again.
 
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