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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I've been friends with a guy who is ten years older than me for the past four/five months. At first I met him through a friend (they work together) we hung out in a group for a while but then him and I started spending more and more time together. When I first met him I didn't really like him (not even as a friend his first words to me were "You're vegan... I think you're an idiot"). Anyways I showed him Earthlings and now he's almost vegetarian, he's also cutting down on eggs and dairy cause he does want to go vegan eventually. Because of this we started spending more time together, and now we're seeing each other.
So my Mom (whom I've had to move back home with this past year lucky me) doesn't like me seeing this older guy. She thinks its gross and that he only wants to use me. Friends of mine who know the guy (particularly the friend who introduced us) are ok with it - but even then some other friends are like "*gasp* ten years - my god!". Being with him makes more sense to me than dating a guy/girl around my age who eats meat or has other lifestyle differences - I'm trying to explain this to people but they don't get it and I find it very annoying. Other than taking the angsty "It's my life not yours" approach how can I explain this to people? I know they care about me and only want what is best for me, but i'm happy with a guy who is mature and truly understands the animal rights issues. Not to mention he treats me with more respect than any most other people around my age ever has - in this type of intimate relationship.
 

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Before I can go further how old are you? Are you in your 20's at least ? If so here is my experience.

I started dateing my husband when was 23 years old that was 11 years ago. My husband is 13 years older then me and we got married when I was 25 years old.

My sister was 31 when she married her husband and he was 41 years old, age don't make a difference its just a number.
Everything things my husband is in his late 30's not late 40's.
 

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age is just a number
im almost 19 & my boyfriends almost 25!

i know it's annoying to hear people's opinions/reactions, but after a while they are going to forget the age difference!
 

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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
Quote:
Originally Posted by peacefulveglady View Post

Before I can go further how old are you? Are you in your 20's at least ? If so here is my experience.
Yes, I'm 22. I probably should have mentioned its a legal age difference.
 

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are you male or female?

I think it was common and preferable for me at times to date people who were older. *shrug* depends on the person. Maybe she's concerned if you're female and he's a male and she thinks he will take advantage?
 

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Parents are parents, they will worry about anything, but your are their baby. There's no easy answer to this problem unfortunately, just give it time...lots of time x
 

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Discussion Starter · #7 ·
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Originally Posted by penny79 View Post

Maybe she's concerned if you're female and he's a male and she thinks he will take advantage?
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Originally Posted by LadyMetal87 View Post

but your are their baby.
That is true, and something I never considered, I'm youngest in the family and only daughter.
 

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Quote:
Originally Posted by vegansarawr View Post

That is true, and something I never considered, I'm youngest in the family and only daughter.
I am the youngest daughter of my parents. My two sisters are 11 and 8 years older then me, if you think that is amazing how about this as my Birthday 11/08, The month and date when i was born matched the date of how old my sisters were at the time I was born.
 

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People are all different, age is just another characteristic. It can be important, but it doesn't have to be, just like any other difference between people who are dating.
 

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Yes there are tonnes of other reasons lol. My dad still tells my boyfriend he should get a hair cut and take out his snakebites.
 

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Quote:
Originally Posted by LadyMetal87 View Post

Yes there are tonnes of other reasons lol. My dad still tells my boyfriend he should get a hair cut and take out his snakebites.
I would allow my daughter to date a guy with long hair.
 

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I see nothing wrong with being in a relationship with someone who is 10 years older, my husband is 22 years older than me and we started seeing each other when I was 25.

If this is the guy for you your family and friends will eventually get over it and realize that you are happy with him. Be patient.
 

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10 years is nothing!

Maybe sit your mum down and ask her exactly what it is that bothers her. Then you have a better chance of persuading her that she needn't worry.
 

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Discussion Starter · #16 ·
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Originally Posted by delicioso View Post

Something I've noticed: Young girls and old guys often say "age is just a number".
Maybe its because everyone else is too immature or traditional to understand that it is.
 

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The unwritten rule that I've always heard about is this:

youngest appropriate age to date = older age/2+7

So if I was 22, I could date a 18 year old. If I was 18 then 16. If I was 16 then 14. If I was 30 then 22.

But beyond that, while age may not matter much for a lot of things, there is something to say about stations of life and life experience. If the difference is too much one person may be ready to settle down, while the other just wants to party with friends all the time, or one person wants to go on dates three times a week while the other just wants to work and relax and date once a week.
 

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I am in my late 20's and I still think that age is just a number. I hang out with guys who are almost 10 years older than me and guys who are 5 years younger and I have no issue with either. we are not dating but thats for different reasons than age, lol
 

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It only creeps me out when guys in their 80's are dating girls who are young enough to be their granddaughters.
 

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Phoenix Days View Post

It only creeps me out when guys in their 80's are dating girls who are young enough to be their granddaughters.
Like Hugh Hefner?? C'mon don't you find him sexy??
 
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