|Topic Review (Newest First)|
|06-12-2008 09:13 AM|
if i'm ever in your position i hope to be even half as rational and level-headed as you're being. i'd say good luck but i don't think you need it
|06-06-2008 11:09 AM|
|MsChris||Congratulations! I was out of college when I had my first and you are so much more 'together' than I was! You'll do great!|
|05-30-2008 01:43 AM|
|05-29-2008 09:40 AM|
|Irish_Munchkin||Congratulations on the pregnancy and the engagement! I'm so glad everything worked out so well for you! You will have to keep us all updated and let us know how you are getting on!|
|05-26-2008 07:28 PM|
|MyrtleXeiba||You seem like you have a handle on life. I think that you could handle a child. You might not think that now, but when (if) you have it in your arms you might change your mind. That is just my opinion.|
|05-22-2008 11:31 AM|
|NotYet||I know I'm late but congratulations! We're getting a new baby in November, it's really exciting!|
|04-23-2008 09:55 PM|
|synergy||Congrats on your wonderful surprise!|
|04-23-2008 03:49 PM|
my friend from the US who also birthed in NZ twice had a similar experience with her midwives. her second some came early and was a hospital birth, but she was there with her and a great support all the way.
good midwives are a blessing.
|04-22-2008 06:49 PM|
I highly recommend qualified midwives. I felt very lucky to give birth in New Zealand, where a midwife can more easily be your medical person of choice. Sure, there are bad midwives and fantastic specialists, but I wanted my care to be provided by someone who saw pregnancy as a natural event in life, not a disease state.
I was able to find a midwife who was quite accepting of the fact that I didn't eat animal foods, had an episiotomy rate was astronomically low, attended home, hospital or birth center births, and was very comfortable with the fact that I read widely about things and was unlikely to accept the Standard Line as given to pregnant women. Oh, and she was a qualified lactation consultant and a member of LLL. She remains a friend seven years later. I hope you are as lucky.
Aw, I'm so happy for you. Everything's sounding like it's coming together.
|04-22-2008 11:59 AM|
|rabid_child||Congratulations! I'm glad you were able to come up with a plan that would be good for everyone. Good luck with your pregnancy.|
|04-22-2008 09:59 AM|
that's very cool. i'm glad that you have some good midwives and birth centers near you. our closest is about 45 minutes away on a 'good' driving day! LOL
i'm really enjoying my pregnancy a lot. it's a great deal of fun.
today, the baby and ryan and i played a 'game.' the baby would push out, and then we would poke in, and the baby would push where we poked. we moved all around the belly and did it. it was so engrossing that we left late for work! LOL
it's really a lot of fun.
|04-22-2008 09:44 AM|
|ADizzyGirl||Thanks for the links zoebird, I remember reading a lot about unassisted birth from you on this board a few years ago and it really got me interested in alternative birth options if the time came. I'm planning to go the midwifery care route, the Women and Infants' Hospital in Providence has several CNMs as well as an alternative birthing center that I'm looking into.. I'll be calling them this afternoon to make my first prenatal appointment I admire you for doing the whole thing on your own, that's amazing!|
|04-22-2008 09:10 AM|
midwifery care is another option!
personally, i'm doing an unassisted birth and pregnancy (no doctors, no prenatal care in the medical sense, and no midwife), but that's because i feel comfortable with it.
women have lots of options; the doctor isn't the only one! choose your own birth process!
and you might like mothering.com's web site and message boards as well.
|04-22-2008 09:02 AM|
|codemonkey||Oh, find a doc and get your prenatal care started as soon as you can. It might be a little tricky finding one who'll support your veg*an-ness but get some good veg*an pregnancy nutrition books go in armed with information. Don't throw their nutritional advice out the window, just make it veg.|
|04-22-2008 08:44 AM|
|Beachbnny||Congratulations!!!! It seems like this is going to be a wonderful thing for you Sometimes life changes in the blink of an eye. Again, congrats!|
|04-22-2008 08:29 AM|
Yay! I'm so excited for you!!!
It's actually pretty amazing when you're in college how much time you have to raise a kid when you're not doing the crazy college party animal thing.
I can't tell you how many nights I spent cuddling my kids to sleep while studying.
|04-22-2008 05:40 AM|
Talked to my now-fiance last night. His whole family is excited to meet me and really happy for us. He's really excited now too.. we were pretty scared when I first found out, neither of us would have been upset about never having kids but now that it's actually happening we're thrilled.
Haha.. I spent yesterday crying with my roommates and then crying on the phone with my mom. This is going to be the hardest thing I've ever done and I'm so happy it's ridiculous
|04-22-2008 05:25 AM|
|04-21-2008 09:26 PM|
i wish you all the best!!
|04-21-2008 07:21 PM|
|Cissy||congrats on everything|
|04-21-2008 07:02 PM|
|Annikat||Wow!!!!! I am so happy for you!!!!|
|04-21-2008 02:08 PM|
Congratulations or felicitations or whatever! That's so fantastic. You have a wonderful next stage of life ahead of you.
Oh, and if you thought you got comments about being veg*an before, just wait until people know you're PREGNANT and veg*n. Criticism and nosy-parkering ramp up to an unbelievable level. Hold fast, you can grow and nourish a healthy baby on a vegan diet.
Take care and enjoy the pregnancy.
|04-21-2008 11:23 AM|
i'm 5.5 months along and i still fit into my jeans and all of my pants. only my belly in front is getting bigger. everything else is the same or smaller (believe it or not, my butt/hips are smaller! LOL). well, my breasts are bigger also.
i bought a "b-buckle" which you put onto your jeans so that they "stretch" with you as your belly grows. i'm still not using it, and one of my clients who is due any day now told me she didn't use hers until she was 6.5 months.
so, no worries. you'll be able to fit into your jeans, most likely.
|04-21-2008 08:40 AM|
|04-21-2008 07:54 AM|
|04-21-2008 07:50 AM|
|GhostUser||Oh, wow! Congrats!!! That's awesome!|
|04-21-2008 07:48 AM|
We had a HUGE discussion last night/this morning... We didn't feel like putting it off because he was basically feeling the same way as me.
We're keeping it and getting married.
It's amazing how life can change so quickly... two weeks ago I didn't think I'd ever want to have kids. Now I'm facing giving up my selfish spending habits, drinking at the bars with friends, being able to fit into my jeans... and I'm so okay with all of it. We're a little scared but it's really exciting at the same time. We're both pretty sure our families will be supportive, but then again I haven't told my mom yet (I'm calling her tonight). Oh man.. I'm an adult. When did this happen??
My next concern... I need to find a doctor somewhere in or between Providence and Worcester. I want to get an appointment ASAP to confirm that everything's okay and give this baby the best possible start. I'm about to start crying again.. I never imagined I'd be this happy about a baby...
|04-20-2008 07:19 PM|
Whew, I was worried I'd come across as a pro-life campaigner.
In your first post you mentioned that probably there's no such thing as truly being ready for a baby. I know for myself, despite the fact that we'd tried for two years to get pregnant, when I found out I was actually pregnant, I had a feeling of "what? we're not ready for this! omigod, what are we going to do now!!??" Your feelings may be more intense because it was one of the last things on your mind, but planned pregnancies also require serious mental shifts.
There's also rarely an ideal time to have a baby. True, they're not conducive to graduate study. Neither are they conducive to establishing a career. Nor moving ahead in a career. As Kristy said, it may actually be less difficult while both of you are in school and have more flexibility with your schedules than most jobs would allow. My point is that unless it is truly impossible to have and support a baby now, this timing-during-school issue should perhaps come behind other considerations like your emotional readiness, the father's involvement and commitment with you and the baby, your relationship with the father, your financial and other support systems (involving the father and otherwise), and your own visualizations of your life after either choice.
You're doing all the right things to keep both choices possible for now and you do have time to make the decision either way. At the end of the day, it's your decision (and possibly to some extent your boyfriend's) and nobody else is in a legitimate position to tell you what is right for you.
Back to work!
|04-20-2008 07:06 PM|
i think that if you want to keep this baby, you'll find a way. i know a lot of people who have children while in graduate school--many who do this on purpose--and they always do quite well.
so, for my own part, i wouldn't let school be the tipping factor. also, with your combined income ($54k), depending upon where you live, that can be quite a good income. my husband and i lived on that for many years, until he got this 'surprise' advancement that took him up quite a bit. we'd gotten pregnant before that happened, and felt that we could do fine financially--taking care of ourselves and a baby.
good luck with everything and congrats on your graduation and future schooling!
|04-20-2008 03:01 PM|
Thanks everyone... I'm trying to be good and get my schoolwork done, but it's kinda hard to focus with this going on too.
ksfc, you've definitely nailed it. The more it's setting in, the more I find myself trying to rationalize having and raising this baby. I'm still not ready to make a definite choice yet. But I'm also not feeling trapped or scared by the idea of parenthood.
I'll keep everyone posted.. thanks for the support, it's much appreciated
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