The 'Biological' Excuses People Use
This ain’t some hippy dippy wishful thinking.
It’s cold hard science.
You know who barely has salivary glands? Lions.
You have a predator’s ‘canine teeth’? Psh, go compare a leaf-munching gorilla’s measurement
Then tell me more about how you’re an expert in animal dentition.
We hear about pH in chemistry
But somehow the information hasn’t trickled down
Slightly more alkaline stomach, acidic colon
Your pH is the exact opposite of a carnivore’s within.
You have a lavish labyrinth of lengthy intestines
While a lion’s liver is large
Compared to body weight, to detoxify.
‘But I need protein!’
Have fun with your cancer and your chronic disease.
You feed your canine stuff that’s 80% corn meal
And you comin’ up sayin’ you need every-meal meat.
Even domestic dogs can be vegetarian.
Ask a veterinarian.
The second longest living dog on record
Was named Bramble.
Look him up, when you’re done with this rhyming ramble
Unlike a lion, dogs drool
Wolves have less amylase
But that don’t affect my stance
See, lions don’t get heart disease
From eating meat
We are designed
With fruit and seeds in mind
True, we’re not herbivores.
They fully digest fiber just fine.
Orangutans, though, can swing on vines
Better than any Olympic gymnast
And they eat 90% fruit, plus nuts
Cardio and Angio
We have to doctor up meat so much
To even make it palatable
Cook it, drown it in plant-produced mush
Like tomato and mustard seed plus
And yet, people come away thinking
It's supposed to be frequent
Instead of an occasional thing
We were scavengers
Nibbling on a bit of remains
In our evolutionary history
Hunting culture came much later
Google ‘blue zones.’
Try to drink boiled blood from raw meat sometime.
Then come back and tell me how you enjoyed
Barfing it up because your body can't handle the high iron content.
an actually omnivorous bear
While you with your delicate frugivore tummy
Are hesitant to even eat sushi
If it’s not stored and prepared right
With his well-adapted digestion
for two weeks
Chews on the carcass
And poops in the forest
Where ants feel vibrations
Where human ears
don’t hear a tree fall
You wanna know who’s the true tough omni-vore?
They eat every-thing.
They eat things that would have you hanging over your toilet like a drunk
Or lying in a grave
Or crossing yourself like a monk.
There’s a reason the three major monotheistic religions
Cross them off their menu.
Hell, even Peter in Act 10 understood he was receiving an allegory.
Which shows in his subsequent actions towards fellow humanity
But, you decided to take everything literally.
They have a lot of tolerance
for parasites and toxins.
There’s a reason why ten percent of human corpses
Have signs of trichinosis
A doctor finds it likely symptoms got mistaken for arthritis
You wanna pick your poison?
Be my guest.
Chew the fat.
In your final Act?
You’ll be stumbling and stiff day to day
From inflammation pain
And think it’s just ‘age’
Meanwhile in India 90 year old yogis
Are still doing downward dog poses
You say ‘I love sausage and ham’
The way an abused wife says ‘I love my man.’
At least she’s getting far more pleasure out of her hard-to-kick addiction.
With just a tiny jolt to keep you hog-tied, subservient,
you’re a wimp by comparison.
All for what?
To consume red meat?
To kill any animal
Either FAR more often than called for
Or when it’s totally unnecessary?
And even actively
Choking your arteries
The mighty 900 pound wrecking balls
The pink bare-skinned elephant cousins with tusks
They’ll wreck you even when they’re dead.
An elephant never forgets
And they’ll haunt you like a ghost with a grudge.
The Tony Starks of nature.
They’re the Einsteins
And the Iron Men.
In the studies
Runnin’ rings around ‘beloved’ pet dogs and chimpanzees.
Connoisseurs of chaff.
So go ahead, eat that bacon.
The pigs will have the last laugh.