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#1 Old 08-06-2015, 02:06 AM
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Struggling

I don't know whats just happened....

Ive been vegan on and off a few times. Currently vegan for the last 2months-ish (still transitioning on some things).

Today at work i spoke to a man who runs a reptile shop. I found out he breeds rats for food (don't know if he feeds them live or not - which is distressing me. Oh and i have pet rats btw) then i found out my manager used to work for a company that does animal testing - and this company is very local which i never even knew existed until now.
Its been a huge wake up call, knowing these things happen is one thing. It being practically on my doorstep is another.
I reasearched some things.

...Its somewhat freaking me out now that ive managed to widen my eyes and i have no idea how to comfortably live my life now.
I work at a petrol station. We sell meat milk etc etc.... I am now not comfortable with this. Working for a company that exploits animals. I buy food from tesco (vegan food obv) but even this i am uncomfortable as im buying into a company that deals with things that i fundamentally believe is wrong. By buying and working in these places means i am basically giving them my support and funding them to continue - which i want no part in.
I live with my family who eat meat. Very uncomfortable to witnessing their own dissonance (as they are supposedly "animal lovers" too).

All of these things have just suddenly come crashing down on me. The realisation of how hard it is so escape any animal cruelty or misuse (etc). And i thoroughly psychology distressed by this right now.

I know they say vegan is not necessarily about meeting 100% but i chose to be vegan over vegetarian because i couldn't see the point in still contributing to animal harm/distress/death vegetarian just seemed like a half ass'd approach to me. But now i truely to grasp the way the world works in regards to animals. I really feel like im going to struggle to be apart of this world.

I feel the need to escape this society and idk live on an island with a vegetable patch forever.

Anything less than 100% surely isn't acceptable!?!?

Any advice to deal with all this, its all making me feel very very ill. Having been blissfully ignorant to my own part or accidental support of doing horrible things to animals. It just isnt acceptable on any level.
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#2 Old 08-06-2015, 03:02 AM
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The reason we don't push the idea of perfection is because, unfortunately, perfection is impossible in today's world. You'll drive yourself batty thinking of all the ways in which you inadvertently participate in animal cruelty. The most reasonable course of action is to do what you can. I doubt you could survive if you suddenly quit your job and left home, for instance, but you could start a savings account while you shop around for a more vegan-friendly position and a vegan flatmate. Maybe you could apply to work for the RSPCA or your local animal shelter, or wait tables at a vegan restaurant. Wait until you're actually hired before you quit your job at the petrol station, though! It doesn't do anyone any good to have you broke and starving. That's not what veganism is about.
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#3 Old 08-06-2015, 10:27 AM
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Originally Posted by Chaz14 View Post
...Its somewhat freaking me out now that ive managed to widen my eyes and i have no idea how to comfortably live my life now.
I work at a petrol station. We sell meat milk etc etc.... I am now not comfortable with this. Working for a company that exploits animals. I buy food from tesco (vegan food obv) but even this i am uncomfortable as im buying into a company that deals with things that i fundamentally believe is wrong. By buying and working in these places means i am basically giving them my support and funding them to continue - which i want no part in.
I live with my family who eat meat. Very uncomfortable to witnessing their own dissonance (as they are supposedly "animal lovers" too).

All of these things have just suddenly come crashing down on me. The realisation of how hard it is so escape any animal cruelty or misuse (etc). And i thoroughly psychology distressed by this right now.

I know they say vegan is not necessarily about meeting 100% but i chose to be vegan over vegetarian because i couldn't see the point in still contributing to animal harm/distress/death vegetarian just seemed like a half ass'd approach to me. But now i truely to grasp the way the world works in regards to animals. I really feel like im going to struggle to be apart of this world.

I feel the need to escape this society and idk live on an island with a vegetable patch forever.

Anything less than 100% surely isn't acceptable!?!?

Any advice to deal with all this, its all making me feel very very ill. Having been blissfully ignorant to my own part or accidental support of doing horrible things to animals. It just isnt acceptable on any level.
I love you, Chaz.

Look buddy, here's what you do: Chill out. You can't help anybody if you're not in your right mind, right? So breath, relax, and try to look at your situation as objectively as possible.

First, your family. It's almost certain that your family isn't going to see eye to eye with you on this issue, so unless you can avoid it, you need to broach the topic carefully (you can't do it carefully if you're hysterical, right?). First, get your reasons straight in your head, you don't need to give them a powerpoint presentation as to why you're doing what you're doing, just be honest and concise when you tell them. Then, assuming they don't throw up their hands in despair for having reared such child as strange and abnormal as you, tell them as CLEARLY and ACCURATELY as possible, exactly what you're excluding from your diet from now on. Do not give them the opportunity to make a mistake. That conversation is always awkward. If they fight you on it, you gotta stand your ground, work around them if you have to. In some cases, they might just say "Okay, cool." and that's the extent of it, but be prepared for total anarchy.

Secondly, Tesco. Consider the fact that you are outnumbered in the BILLIONS by other people who do not give the slightest crap about non-human exploitation. If you live in any kind of town or city, they're unavoidable, and it's almost guaranteed that any given restaurant owner, supermarket manager, or fast-food pusher is going to be omni. Now, despite this, you need to eat, and they're selling vegan foods. Buy that food with the knowledge that the law of Supply and Demand translates your purchase into their financial incentive to stock more of that product. Your money could go towards doing just that. However it's also entirely possible that that money will go towards allowing that manager to buy a fishing boat, a slaughterhouse, or an ice cream cone. The truth is you have no control over how he or she spends that money other than what you buy it with. If your employer pays you to wash somebody's windshield and you use that money to purchase a plane ticket so you can hijack a flight, crash it and kill everyone on board, your EMPLOYER's not to blame, right?

Thirdly, your job. I really can't give you great advice here since I do not know the exact circumstances of your position. I obviously think you should quit, but how, when, and then to where is entirely dependent on a number of factors. Think on it and plan it out. It can be a relief just to know when the burden of guilt will be lifted.

Going straight to work at a vegan restaurant is extremely unrealistic in most cases and I strongly disagree with the suggestion to work for the RSPCA, but that's a subject for another time. There are plenty of vegan-friendly (not even food-related) jobs out there, what matters now is getting out and finding one.
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#4 Old 08-06-2015, 11:15 AM
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Why is it unrealistic to work at a vegan restaurant?
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#5 Old 08-06-2015, 12:49 PM
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Why is it unrealistic to work at a vegan restaurant?
I don't know about where you live, but in most places vegan restaurants are extremely uncommon, let alone hiring.

I would love to work at the only one where I live, but as many times as I've applied I've never been hired and their turnover rate isn't exactly bad.

I was just advising not to set one's sights too high. If you can get one of those jobs, hell yeah! Go for it! But the only ones I know of are independent local businesses, and those are lucky to last more than a few seasons without substantial demand. I'm pretty sure most vegetarians have never stepped foot into a vegan restaurant, let alone seen one.
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#6 Old 08-06-2015, 01:15 PM
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I'm sure we've all had the feeling of wanting to move to an island away from all the crap, unfortunately it's not realistic for the most of us.

The worst thing you can do is focus on the injustice all day every day in my opinion, maybe spend a couple of minutes a day which should be enough to remind you why you're making the life choices you are.

Unfortunately we have to turn a blind eye to many things in life, seeing people drink milk and eat meat makes me feel annoyed but I blank it out otherwise everything can become too overwhelming.
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#7 Old 08-07-2015, 12:03 AM
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Thank you all for your replies.

I feel somewhat calmer today.

But i just can't shake the need to be 100% vegan. Though what I've mostly taken on board and appreciate from everyones comments is that it is a process. I can only do what i can when i am able. But even that sentence doesn't sit well with me, just doesn't feel like its good enough.

But anyway, yes i have to keep realistic, look at it like a process of reducing my part in any of it.

I have been intending to leave my job for some time, but this has at least made me think of in more depth what kind of company i do want to work for.
And as much as i take on board the advice given about tesco, my aim will still be to reduce and hopefully eliminate buying anything from companies like this where possible.
But i don't have an endless supply of money and some things will just take time i guess. Like, I changed to a vegan diet overnight a few months back, but still working on replacing other things, washing powder, beauty products, etc, that i just couldn't afford to buy all new straight away.
It does make me feel incredibly guilty that i can't eliminate all inadvertent harm 100% straight away. But i have to just look at it like a process i guess?

And steve your absolutely right, if i ever doubt or let others make me doubt my decision i know exactly what to look at/think about to remind me why i am choosing to change my lifestyle.
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#8 Old 08-07-2015, 01:17 AM
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Originally Posted by Chaz14 View Post
I feel somewhat calmer today.

But i just can't shake the need to be 100% vegan. Though what I've mostly taken on board and appreciate from everyones comments is that it is a process. I can only do what i can when i am able. But even that sentence doesn't sit well with me, just doesn't feel like its good enough.
That is a wise outlook.

Remember, as tragic as it may be, you can't be held responsible for the ants you will unavoidably trample. The best thing to do is to be concious of the situation and take reasonable steps to avoid it, both literally and figuratively.
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#9 Old 08-07-2015, 03:39 AM
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Originally Posted by Dogma View Post
I don't know about where you live, but in most places vegan restaurants are extremely uncommon, let alone hiring.

I would love to work at the only one where I live, but as many times as I've applied I've never been hired and their turnover rate isn't exactly bad.

I was just advising not to set one's sights too high. If you can get one of those jobs, hell yeah! Go for it! But the only ones I know of are independent local businesses, and those are lucky to last more than a few seasons without substantial demand. I'm pretty sure most vegetarians have never stepped foot into a vegan restaurant, let alone seen one.
Sometimes I forget how lucky I've been to live in very vegan-friendly areas. Even when I lived in the southern US, I had at least one vegan restaurant in every town where I stayed-- two in Charlotte, NC!-- plus plenty of veg-friendly restaurants, whole foods markets, etc. My job at a vegan restaurant was one of the best I've ever had.
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#10 Old 08-07-2015, 05:13 AM
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Sometimes I forget how lucky I've been to live in very vegan-friendly areas.
Small towns where there's only one supermarket are practically guaranteed to preclude vegan restaurants entirely. It was a huge surprise to discover the one near me. That one only persists because it's in the trendy district of a big city. I'm sure many such restaurants wouldn't survive if they weren't considered a healthy novelty by omnis.
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Last edited by Dogma; 08-07-2015 at 05:00 PM.
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#11 Old 08-07-2015, 04:07 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Chaz14 View Post
I don't know whats just happened....

Ive been vegan on and off a few times. Currently vegan for the last 2months-ish (still transitioning on some things).

Today at work i spoke to a man who runs a reptile shop. I found out he breeds rats for food (don't know if he feeds them live or not - which is distressing me. Oh and i have pet rats btw) then i found out my manager used to work for a company that does animal testing - and this company is very local which i never even knew existed until now.
Its been a huge wake up call, knowing these things happen is one thing. It being practically on my doorstep is another.
I reasearched some things.

...Its somewhat freaking me out now that ive managed to widen my eyes and i have no idea how to comfortably live my life now.
I work at a petrol station. We sell meat milk etc etc.... I am now not comfortable with this. Working for a company that exploits animals. I buy food from tesco (vegan food obv) but even this i am uncomfortable as im buying into a company that deals with things that i fundamentally believe is wrong. By buying and working in these places means i am basically giving them my support and funding them to continue - which i want no part in.
I live with my family who eat meat. Very uncomfortable to witnessing their own dissonance (as they are supposedly "animal lovers" too).

All of these things have just suddenly come crashing down on me. The realisation of how hard it is so escape any animal cruelty or misuse (etc). And i thoroughly psychology distressed by this right now.

I know they say vegan is not necessarily about meeting 100% but i chose to be vegan over vegetarian because i couldn't see the point in still contributing to animal harm/distress/death vegetarian just seemed like a half ass'd approach to me. But now i truely to grasp the way the world works in regards to animals. I really feel like im going to struggle to be apart of this world.

I feel the need to escape this society and idk live on an island with a vegetable patch forever.

Anything less than 100% surely isn't acceptable!?!?

Any advice to deal with all this, its all making me feel very very ill. Having been blissfully ignorant to my own part or accidental support of doing horrible things to animals. It just isnt acceptable on any level.
Although the vegan diet was defined early on it was as late as 1949 before Leslie J Cross pointed out that the society lacked a definition of veganism and he suggested “[t]he principle of the emancipation of animals from exploitation by man”.This is later clarified as “to seek an end to the use of animals by man for food, commodities, work, hunting, vivisection, and by all other uses involving exploitation of animal life by man”.

When the society became a registered charity in 1979, the Memorandum and Articles of Association updated this definition of “veganism” as:

[…] a philosophy and way of living which seeks to exclude—as far as is possible and practicable—all forms of exploitation of, and cruelty to, animals for food, clothing or any other purpose; and by extension, promotes the development and use of animal-free alternatives for the benefit of humans, animals and the environment. In dietary terms it denotes the practice of dispensing with all products derived wholly or partly from animals. Donald Watson, founder of the Vegan Society. Site for quote here.

Don't do nothing because you can't do everything. Do something!
Colleen Patrick Goudreau

"Anytime I think I'm perfect, I remember my cousin lives on an island, and I've never walked over to visit her." -My Veggieboards tagline.

There is no such thing as a perfect vegan, the world, as a whole, is just to imperfect for that. You work in a petrol station, at least you're working, and you can opt out of eating the non dairy non meat stuff, but it will still be there, whether you sell it or someone else does. People do things like sell reptiles and buy reptiles (I don't understand it, but I'm not going to say anything about it, either). There will always be cruelty on this planet, it's us, the vegetarians and vegans that are slowly changing the world. Things like Meatless Mondays, and, as Howard Lyman calls it, "Motherless milk" on the mainstream grocery shelves. Entire schools, school districts, and cities are going meatless, and it's gaining in popularity every day. Just keep up eating vegan food, and remember you aren't the vegan police. It'd be nice, but it probably won't happen in my lifetime, perhaps the next generation will get their act together and have entirely vegan (or at least more vegan then now) world. I hope I made sense and didn't deter you from your vegan journey. Good luck.
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Anytime I think I'm perfect, I remember that my cousin lives on an island, and I've never walked over to visit her.
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