Crying and Making a Scene at a Restaurant - VeggieBoards
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#1 Old 05-27-2015, 09:29 AM
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Unhappy Crying and Making a Scene at a Restaurant

Hey guys, its Ash.

Yesterday, my dad thought it was a great idea to take me and his friend to a steakhouse. I cringed at the thought, but felt that I could stomach whatever I saw in there.

We walked in and sat at the bar, dad and his comrade struck up conversations about the old days. I looked up.... to find the decapitated heads of a cow and a deer staring right at me.... this had never happened before until now, my emotions lost control and I ended up crying loudly. It made my dad very upset because I'm sure I caused some kind of scene. He asked what was wrong and all I could blurt out was "the cow the f***ing cow!!!" I cried for about 5-6 min or more. We did stay there to eat but I was very uncomfortable... the rest of the place was no better, deerskin lamps covered in tiny baby antlers, cow skulls everywhere, paintings of bull fights and hunting, my stomach still hurts remembering it....... I have never had my emotions explode like that before, then again I haven't walked into a steak house since going vegan...

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#2 Old 05-27-2015, 09:42 AM
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i went out last night with a meat-eater. he ordered pork. it really disturbed me but i tried hard not to show it or say anything.

he wants to see me again.

i am so turned off by the pork. all i can think about is how cute and smart and loving little piglets are.

i don't even want to be bothered to have to explain this to him.

sometimes i just wish i could stay home all the time and not come out again until the rest of the people of the world comes to their senses.
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#3 Old 05-27-2015, 09:45 AM
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That's horrible, poor pig. I mean and meat eaters are so mean about it too... Like my dad asked me where I wanted to eat, I smiled and said "There's a place on happy cow that serves vegan food down the road." and he said "we could go there and have horrible food or we could go where I want to go and eat something delish." wow dad... he's seen all the documentaries and knows what goes on in factory farms but yet he told me he just doesn't care...
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#4 Old 05-27-2015, 10:14 AM
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poor you, that sounds like a bad trip.
i wish I could control my emotions for situations like that
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#5 Old 05-27-2015, 11:17 AM
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Hang in there Ash, we all know this is not the easiest path we've chosen.
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#6 Old 05-27-2015, 11:18 AM
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My first question is - does your Dad know that you're vegan? I'm puzzled as to why someone would knowingly take a vegan to a steakhouse…? What in the world did you eat?

The thing is, dead animals are all around us. Sure, most of them don't have their heads intact, but we're still surrounded by leather shoes and car interiors, pet food, restaurants, commercials - it's everywhere. We have to be strong, and embrace the fact that we are no longer trapped into thinking cruelty in any form is acceptable.

I would suggest two things - first, tell those around you that you're vegan, if you haven't. If they give you a hard time, stick to your guns, but be very nice about it. Offer to help shop and cook, if you have to share food with the family. Don't be passive.

And secondly, avoid drama. Be mature, educated and self-reliant. This is important, after all.

It is our choices that show what we truly are far more than our abilities. ~A. Dumbledore
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#7 Old 05-27-2015, 11:26 AM
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He knows I'm a vegan, he's known that for years. He said im brainwashed... I ate plain mashed potatoes and steamed green beans...
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#8 Old 05-27-2015, 11:27 AM
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*a year not years
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#9 Old 05-27-2015, 11:32 AM
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What's this "brainwashing" nonsense I'm hearing everywhere all of a sudden I wonder.. does that mean teaching kids to brush their teeth at night or to wash hands after using the bathroom is also brainwashing? Its come to a point that even sensible and logical things are grouped into this.

Veganism is the only natural way to be, period.
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#10 Old 05-27-2015, 12:01 PM
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Originally Posted by varun View Post
What's this "brainwashing" nonsense I'm hearing everywhere all of a sudden I wonder.. does that mean teaching kids to brush their teeth at night or to wash hands after using the bathroom is also brainwashing? Its come to a point that even sensible and logical things are grouped into this.

Veganism is the only natural way to be, period.
That's a good point, also weren't these 'omni's' brainwashed to eat meat and love animals at the same time?
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#11 Old 05-27-2015, 12:48 PM
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That's a good point, also weren't these 'omni's' brainwashed to eat meat and love animals at the same time?
I guess they were educated, not brainwashed. Brainwashing sounds like the people want to harm the kids. Omni feed their children dead animals because they think that's the best for them. We have to do the education work again...

I hope your dad will think a bit more about how to not make you feel so upset.
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Bon appétit !

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#12 Old 05-27-2015, 01:32 PM
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people do what the people before them did. there to lazy to comprehend new ideas, so when some one is vegan, it annoys them because your waking them up from there slumber.
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#13 Old 05-27-2015, 01:52 PM
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I'm so sorry that you had to go through all that. What a horrific place. Next time your dad invites you out, refuse to go unless it's a veg-friendly restaurant. You don't have to put yourself through that, and your dad is showing a startling lack of care by expecting you to eat bland mashed potatoes and green beans every time you go out to eat.
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#14 Old 05-27-2015, 04:02 PM
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Many years before I went vegetarian, I already couldn't stand to be in, much less eat in, any room that had dead animal heads staring down at me.
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#15 Old 05-27-2015, 04:43 PM
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Can't blame you for crying.

"We have enslaved the rest of the animal creation, and have treated our distant cousins in fur and feathers so badly that beyond doubt, if they were able to formulate a religion, they would depict the Devil in human form." - William Ralphe Inge

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#16 Old 05-27-2015, 04:55 PM
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Originally Posted by TheVeggieCat View Post
Hey guys, its Ash.

Yesterday, my dad thought it was a great idea to take me and his friend to a steakhouse. I cringed at the thought, but felt that I could stomach whatever I saw in there.

We walked in and sat at the bar, dad and his comrade struck up conversations about the old days. I looked up.... to find the decapitated heads of a cow and a deer staring right at me.... this had never happened before until now, my emotions lost control and I ended up crying loudly. It made my dad very upset because I'm sure I caused some kind of scene. He asked what was wrong and all I could blurt out was "the cow the f***ing cow!!!" I cried for about 5-6 min or more. We did stay there to eat but I was very uncomfortable... the rest of the place was no better, deerskin lamps covered in tiny baby antlers, cow skulls everywhere, paintings of bull fights and hunting, my stomach still hurts remembering it....... I have never had my emotions explode like that before, then again I haven't walked into a steak house since going vegan...
Your dad probably took you there on purpose because ur vegan (if he knew about it already). My family did the same thing to me years ago just to try to force me to eat meat and be annoying... Don't feel bad about your reaction. They put u in an uncomfortable situation. Sorry that happened to u. Maybe u will have an excuse not to go next time haha.
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#17 Old 05-27-2015, 05:17 PM
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Sorry about your bad experience.

A few months ago I was in a grocery store and smelled "something." It smelled familiar, but I couldn't put my finger on it. When I was giving the cashier the money, it hit me......bacon!!! I kinda freaked out a little bit, and tried not to breathe real hard.

I can't imagine going to a steak house.
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#18 Old 05-28-2015, 12:25 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TheVeggieCat View Post
Hey guys, its Ash.

Yesterday, my dad thought it was a great idea to take me and his friend to a steakhouse. I cringed at the thought, but felt that I could stomach whatever I saw in there.

We walked in and sat at the bar, dad and his comrade struck up conversations about the old days. I looked up.... to find the decapitated heads of a cow and a deer staring right at me.... this had never happened before until now, my emotions lost control and I ended up crying loudly. It made my dad very upset because I'm sure I caused some kind of scene. He asked what was wrong and all I could blurt out was "the cow the f***ing cow!!!" I cried for about 5-6 min or more. We did stay there to eat but I was very uncomfortable... the rest of the place was no better, deerskin lamps covered in tiny baby antlers, cow skulls everywhere, paintings of bull fights and hunting, my stomach still hurts remembering it....... I have never had my emotions explode like that before, then again I haven't walked into a steak house since going vegan...
I'm sorry you had to go through that. Next time, you get to pick the place. I hope.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Poppy View Post
My first question is - does your Dad know that you're vegan? I'm puzzled as to why someone would knowingly take a vegan to a steakhouse…? What in the world did you eat?

The thing is, dead animals are all around us. Sure, most of them don't have their heads intact, but we're still surrounded by leather shoes and car interiors, pet food, restaurants, commercials - it's everywhere. We have to be strong, and embrace the fact that we are no longer trapped into thinking cruelty in any form is acceptable.

I would suggest two things - first, tell those around you that you're vegan, if you haven't. If they give you a hard time, stick to your guns, but be very nice about it. Offer to help shop and cook, if you have to share food with the family. Don't be passive.

And secondly, avoid drama. Be mature, educated and self-reliant. This is important, after all.
@Poppy , I'm going to break this to you as gently as possible. People aren't nice.

Anytime I think I'm perfect, I remember that my cousin lives on an island, and I've never walked over to visit her.
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#19 Old 05-28-2015, 05:41 PM
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[MENTION=4
Poppy, I'm going to break this to you as gently as possible. People aren't nice.
I know. Silly me, I think parenting should be more about supporting your kid and keeping the lines of communication open - than about ridiculing their choices and embarrassing them in public.
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#20 Old 05-29-2015, 02:54 AM
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I know. Silly me, I think parenting should be more about supporting your kid and keeping the lines of communication open - than about ridiculing their choices and embarrassing them in public.
That's what shocks me about these threads where parents say and do horrible things to their veg*n children. Even if you truly don't "get" why someone would stop eating animal flesh, why not support your kid anyway? Surely if your child got into some hobby in which you have no interest, you'd at least not openly ridicule him for it? I understand that many parents have health concerns, but it's not that hard to Google "vegan diet health" or to ask a doctor.
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#21 Old 05-29-2015, 04:24 AM
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Wow. I can understand if it were a planned affair, but it really sounds like your dad planned that reaction. Don't eat with him. Ignore him, at least I would.

And you don't need to 'luv' animals, whether they're cute or not. You need to live and let live. Rude and offensive people surround us every day and we don't hurt them if we're the least bit normal. Personally I'm getting tired of people who think veg'ns are all ultra sensitive and lovey dovey. Maybe that's how your dad sees it and needs to understand the reality turned around. He hunts? Maybe he'd like to know how hunting would feel if he did it 'natural' way. Teeth and nails
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#22 Old 05-29-2015, 05:57 AM
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my dad objected my vegetarianism (i was a vegetarian while he was alive) for the first few years. not in a bad way. it was like a battle of papers. he would go onto medline and show me all these abstracts about deficiencies, and i would show him all these abstracts about benefits.

i moved back home one summer. he had a garden. every day i'd cook up a huge batch of collards, kale, mustard greens, turnip greens, or broccoli. we'd have big salads as well. i was also baking whole wheat bread.

he would laughing joke about having to use the restroom more often. and gradually he quit trying to convince me that i was damaging myself.

the woman he was seeing was a vegetarian. he gave her an ultimatum: eat meat or leave. so she ate meat. i remember telling her that if a man said that to me, i'd walk.

but one of the last things he said to me before he was too far gone with alzheimer's was that i was right about my diet.

i am really sorry that your dad is being so mean about it. he thinks it's silly. maybe one day he will come to understand your point of view.
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#23 Old 05-31-2015, 05:00 PM
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Wow. I can understand if it were a planned affair, but it really sounds like your dad planned that reaction. Don't eat with him. Ignore him, at least I would.

And you don't need to 'luv' animals, whether they're cute or not. You need to live and let live. Rude and offensive people surround us every day and we don't hurt them if we're the least bit normal. Personally I'm getting tired of people who think veg'ns are all ultra sensitive and lovey dovey. Maybe that's how your dad sees it and needs to understand the reality turned around. He hunts? Maybe he'd like to know how hunting would feel if he did it 'natural' way. Teeth and nails
It's natural to build tools for hunting. Apes do it, and so do our species.

A link to Orangutan fishing with a staff : http://primatology.net/2008/04/29/or...spear-to-fish/
Some chimps also make tools with smaller branches to grab insects. (Oh yeah, they are not exclusively frugivores)
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#24 Old 06-01-2015, 12:08 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Poppy View Post
I know. Silly me, I think parenting should be more about supporting your kid and keeping the lines of communication open - than about ridiculing their choices and embarrassing them in public.
Quote:
Originally Posted by no whey jose View Post
That's what shocks me about these threads where parents say and do horrible things to their veg*n children. Even if you truly don't "get" why someone would stop eating animal flesh, why not support your kid anyway? Surely if your child got into some hobby in which you have no interest, you'd at least not openly ridicule him for it? I understand that many parents have health concerns, but it's not that hard to Google "vegan diet health" or to ask a doctor.
Me, too. Sorry, I've been afc for the last few days, and just got back in. I swear I did this all sideways. My grandniece had to take an allergy test, and she couldn't have egg or dairy. I joined VB so I could figure out what I could serve for desserts that everyone, including her, could eat (I wasn't going to tell a 5-year-old she couldn't have dessert because of allergies). Her mother's half brother and half sister moved here, and both of them were vegan, and I thought it'd be a good idea to learn about vegan health and nutrition since I didn't know anything about it, and I really wasn't in a good position to make fun of a diet that sounded healthier than mine did. I hope this makes sense.

Anytime I think I'm perfect, I remember that my cousin lives on an island, and I've never walked over to visit her.
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