Dealing With Non-Vegan Friends and Family - VeggieBoards
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#1 Old 10-27-2014, 09:51 AM
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Dealing With Non-Vegan Friends and Family

if you’re newly vegan or considering going vegan, one of the biggest challenges can be the reactions of your friends and family. in this interview, vegan activist Gary Yourofsky shares his approach to both non-vegan friends & family and also people who become combative about the vegan message. and check out part II, Gary’s one rule for eating with non-vegans: http://bit.ly/1wB2inQ what are your thoughts on this matter? how do you interact with people of different dietary persuasions? (whether you’re vegan or non-vegan) let me know in the comments!
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#2 Old 10-27-2014, 03:27 PM
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Emily -

Good video.....it hashes out a lot of topics. No Ooby cameo, though

My belief is that you have to mix veganist beliefs, tolerance & compassion together for a social smoothie.

If someone wants to eat at my house, it's understood that meat will not be cooked. If I go out with some peeps to a restaurant, and someone orders meat.....it's their decision. I'm not gonna throw down my veggie burrito in disgust. While I STRONGLY DISAGREE with their dietary choices.....I used to be them. If I can compassionately educate them, maybe they will change. Maybe not.

I respect Gary a great deal, however he has a different approach. I admire his passion, but my path is a little more subtle & informative. Ghandi liberated India without a gun or a knife......only words. We need to recognize our differences with our onmi friends, suggest change, and wait for the results. Some people will change, some never will. All you can do is all you can do.

I HOPE EVERYONE HAS A GREAT MEAT FREE DAY!!!!

All animals should be respected & should have the ability to lead a natural & enjoyable life. This means not eating them, or abusing them in any way.

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#3 Old 10-28-2014, 03:19 AM
 
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I respect Gary a great deal, however he has a different approach. I admire his passion, but my path is a little more subtle & informative. Ghandi liberated India without a gun or a knife......only words. We need to recognize our differences with our onmi friends, suggest change, and wait for the results. Some people will change, some never will. All you can do is all you can do.
People like Yourofsky are why vegans are pigeon holed as ecoterrorist whackos by the general population. It's possible to feel passionately about an idea, a belief, or a way of living without resorting to the semi-psychotic rhetoric he helped popularize as the standard for vegan activism. He has never been the sort of messenger I have ever wanted to represent me and his message is not one I want to be associated with. While I abhor violence to animals above all else, some of the things Yourofsky is on record as saying with complete conviction has left me absolutely sickened. I'm always surprised that anyone who prides themselves on living a compassionate and kind life would identify with a man who proudly advocates unspeakable violence against other humans.
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#4 Old 10-28-2014, 06:33 AM
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Emily -

Good video.....it hashes out a lot of topics. No Ooby cameo, though

My belief is that you have to mix veganist beliefs, tolerance & compassion together for a social smoothie.

If someone wants to eat at my house, it's understood that meat will not be cooked. If I go out with some peeps to a restaurant, and someone orders meat.....it's their decision. I'm not gonna throw down my veggie burrito in disgust. While I STRONGLY DISAGREE with their dietary choices.....I used to be them. If I can compassionately educate them, maybe they will change. Maybe not.

I respect Gary a great deal, however he has a different approach. I admire his passion, but my path is a little more subtle & informative. Ghandi liberated India without a gun or a knife......only words. We need to recognize our differences with our onmi friends, suggest change, and wait for the results. Some people will change, some never will. All you can do is all you can do.

I HOPE EVERYONE HAS A GREAT MEAT FREE DAY!!!!
thank you for sharing your approach. i like the idea of a social smoothie i tend to fall somewhere between you and gary, swinging in either direction from time to time. i'm mostly non-confrontational and compassionate but will drive a hard line when it seems necessary.
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#5 Old 10-28-2014, 07:19 AM
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I'm always surprised that anyone who prides themselves on living a compassionate and kind life would identify with a man who proudly advocates unspeakable violence against other humans.
If this was in reference to my post, I will elaborate.

All I know about Gary is his vegan activism, through several videos posted here & elsewhere. I admire his passion for spreading the message of animal compassion. There are very few people that get that message out.

My non-violent approach & respect toward animals extends to humans as well. I don't condone any violence whatsoever. If Gary has stated somewhere that he advocates violence, I strongly disagree with him.
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#6 Old 10-28-2014, 08:02 AM
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Kick his uncle's ass? Why can't this guy ever make his point without threatening somebody? My only dining rule is I wouldn't eat with Gary Yourofsky.
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#7 Old 10-28-2014, 09:55 AM
 
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If this was in reference to my post, I will elaborate.

All I know about Gary is his vegan activism, through several videos posted here & elsewhere. I admire his passion for spreading the message of animal compassion. There are very few people that get that message out.

My non-violent approach & respect toward animals extends to humans as well. I don't condone any violence whatsoever. If Gary has stated somewhere that he advocates violence, I strongly disagree with him.
That wasn't directed at you, Dave. It was just a general reference to a dichotomy that I find puzzling. Anyone that's familiar with Yourofsky's background and history should know that he advocates violence which I find completely incongruous with a compassionate lifestyle.
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#8 Old 10-28-2014, 03:15 PM
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That wasn't directed at you, Dave. It was just a general reference to a dichotomy that I find puzzling. Anyone that's familiar with Yourofsky's background and history should know that he advocates violence which I find completely incongruous with a compassionate lifestyle.
Thanks for the clarification.
I didn't know, since you included a quote from my post.

I am the anti-violence guy. I hold Gandhi, the Dali Llama, Mother Theresa, and Thich Nhat Hanh in high esteem. When I find a moth, or something in my house, I scoop it up & take it outside.

Violence is for those that have not tried logical discussion, or some type of ego reduction technique.
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#9 Old 10-29-2014, 07:33 AM
 
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I don't have many problems with this now, but it was pretty difficult being a vegetarian when I was in primary school. I was mocked and made fun of all the time, and my friends literally used to try and force non-vegetarian food into my mouth. I put up with it then, but I really shouldn't have. It was cruel. Things are a lot easier as an adult, but you still get the odd person who will have a go at you. I just ignore them, because I know I'm doing the right thing.
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#10 Old 10-29-2014, 07:51 AM
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I was mocked and made fun of all the time, and my friends literally used to try and force non-vegetarian food into my mouth.
What is it with omnivores thinking it's funny to "trick" vegetarians and vegans into eating animal products? My mother did this once shortly after I became vegetarian a couple of years ago. She only did it once.

Let's set aside for a moment that it's incredibly disrespectful to do something like that, but one of the big reasons behind my decision to live a compassionate, plant-based lifestyle is for my health. My body doesn't like animal products. So it's incredibly frustrating that people will try and sneak animal products to veggie-eaters, ignoring the fact that they could very well have an adverse health reaction from it! Some people can even be allergic to meat. If someone had a peanut allergy, would they try and sneak them some peanut butter?
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#11 Old 10-30-2014, 01:19 AM
 
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What is it with omnivores thinking it's funny to "trick" vegetarians and vegans into eating animal products? My mother did this once shortly after I became vegetarian a couple of years ago. She only did it once.

Let's set aside for a moment that it's incredibly disrespectful to do something like that, but one of the big reasons behind my decision to live a compassionate, plant-based lifestyle is for my health. My body doesn't like animal products. So it's incredibly frustrating that people will try and sneak animal products to veggie-eaters, ignoring the fact that they could very well have an adverse health reaction from it! Some people can even be allergic to meat. If someone had a peanut allergy, would they try and sneak them some peanut butter?
I genuinely have no idea why... it's very strange and very rude. I've only ever had young kids do it to me, when I was a kid myself, so maybe it was just their lack of understanding. Nobody really knew what vegetarianism was when I was in primary school. I'm appalled that your mother would do that to you... adults really should know better.
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#12 Old 10-30-2014, 06:00 AM
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What is it with omnivores thinking it's funny to "trick" vegetarians and vegans into eating animal products? My mother did this once shortly after I became vegetarian a couple of years ago. She only did it once.
i think that is just blatantly cruel, spiteful and manipulative....it may not always come from a malicious place but it's always malicious in nature...
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#13 Old 10-30-2014, 08:24 PM
 
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Good video. I just watched another on of his speeches that I found posted by We Dig Food. My mom is always making food that I can't eat and then is offend when I pass on eating them.
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#14 Old 10-31-2014, 03:55 AM
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Good video. I just watched another on of his speeches that I found posted by We Dig Food. My mom is always making food that I can't eat and then is offend when I pass on eating them.
ha...i've had that happen more than once
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#15 Old 01-15-2015, 03:07 AM
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People can be mean and think it's funny to feed you non vegan food. I hate being so mistrustful.
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#16 Old 01-15-2015, 04:24 AM
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Great video. I find his passionate clever speeches very inspiring. unlike others I'm not at all offended when he compares holocaust and human slavery to what we've been doing to animals for so long now. I totally agree with most stuff he says.

I think it's very easy and unfair to criticise someone who is actively trying to make a difference on a global scape

As for his advice in part 2 how to deal with non vegans...I'm not sure I can put that to practice right now. I'm very new to veganism and this Saturday is going to be the first time since I've changed to vegan diet and lifestyle that I'll be going out to dinner with people from work. This was arranged before I became vegan and I can't imagine turning around now and telling everyone that I'll not be there unless all eat vegan. Although in the future I can imagine trying to persuade people to eat vegetarian when eating with me.

That advice is also inpractical if you have children who are not vegan. Saying that I'm always happy to see his new videos and always happy to learn from someone I look up to
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#17 Old 01-15-2015, 07:52 AM
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Wow, you guys know a lot of *******s. I've experience zero resistance from friends and family about my veganism. Just last week co-workers asked for a recipe cause they said my lunch smelled delicious. They ate the baked treats I bought in yesterday. I converted one friend to now drinking dairy free milk. My other friend knows I'm a beauty junkie and always tags me in vegan and cruelty free make up and clothes on IG. I also did a vegan beauty and food haul with friends at Lush and Whole foods in December. My friends and family would never try to trick me to eat something. Well my mom did once when I was a kid, but that was to eat more vegetables (she told me broccoli would give me super powers). I guess I'm lucky.
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#18 Old 01-15-2015, 08:03 AM
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Great video. I find his passionate clever speeches very inspiring. unlike others I'm not at all offended when he compares holocaust and human slavery to what we've been doing to animals for so long now. I totally agree with most stuff he says.
I used to be so offended when 'those crazy vegetarians' would compare meat industry to slavery. I'd think they'd were minimizing the horror of my ancestors. It was only after watching Earthlings (is that the movie Joaquin Phoenix narrates?) that I really began to understand speciesim and what I was perpetuating. Also, there was quotation that I posted in Veggie/Vegan image and quote threat that talked about fighting injustice (1960s and 70s black civil rights movement), but support another kind by eating meat. That's when it really hit home for me.


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As for those who are more outspoken, aggressive, and are activists, my friend is Jewish and compares it to Orthodox Judaism. My friend said that the majority of Jews are no longer Orthodox, but Orthodox Jews are very important for maintaining the culture, legacy, and the religion. I feel like those who are in your face get things done. I appreciate that.
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#19 Old 01-15-2015, 09:16 AM
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I used to be so offended when 'those crazy vegetarians' would compare meat industry to slavery. I'd think they'd were minimizing the horror of my ancestors. It was only after watching Earthlings (is that the movie Joaquin Phoenix narrates?) that I really began to understand speciesim and what I was perpetuating. Also, there was quotation that I posted in Veggie/Vegan image and quote threat that talked about fighting injustice (1960s and 70s black civil rights movement), but support another kind by eating meat. That's when it really hit home for me.


----

As for those who are more outspoken, aggressive, and are activists, my friend is Jewish and compares it to Orthodox Judaism. My friend said that the majority of Jews are no longer Orthodox, but Orthodox Jews are very important for maintaining the culture, legacy, and the religion. I feel like those who are in your face get things done. I appreciate that.
Joaquin Phoenix does narrate Earthlings!

I appreciate why some people could get offended by the use of words like "slavery" and "holocaust" if they did not understand the current situation with respect to animal suffering...

The intention is not to belittle human suffering at all, but rather to draw attention to the fact that animals are oppressed as well as humans and they need their story to be heard too...
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#20 Old 01-15-2015, 10:55 PM
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When my sister's stepdaughter's Half-brother and half-sister moved here, we were told they were vegan. My knowledge of veganism was scant (or non-existent, depending on how honest or polite you are) I promptly went to the libraries (I have access to 4)!! and checked out not only cookbooks, but things like the Complete Idiot's Guide to Plant Based Nutrition, and books like that, so I could pepper them with questions such as, "Is your dinner good?" or "Do you dream of rescued sheep?" rather then, "Where do you get your protein?" 3 years on, I'm a vegan and have advised other people on veganism.
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#21 Old 01-16-2015, 07:15 AM
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When people ask me why I don't eat meat I usually give them a very graphic description of why meat disgusts me. Usually shuts them up


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#22 Old 01-16-2015, 07:17 AM
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I don't have many problems with this now, but it was pretty difficult being a vegetarian when I was in primary school. I was mocked and made fun of all the time, and my friends literally used to try and force non-vegetarian food into my mouth. I put up with it then, but I really shouldn't have. It was cruel. Things are a lot easier as an adult, but you still get the odd person who will have a go at you. I just ignore them, because I know I'm doing the right thing.

This used to happen to me at college, my "friends" used to throw meat at me and find my reaction hilarious. My friend now will shove chicken in my face (I know she means well and it's only a joke I love the girl to bits) so I respond by throwing tomatoes back at her (she hates tomatoes)
It sucks but it's not so common anymore.


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#23 Old 01-16-2015, 12:13 PM
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When people ask me why I don't eat meat I usually give them a very graphic description of why meat disgusts me. Usually shuts them up


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I am sure it does! If people were given a guided tour of a slaughterhouse I think the probability of them going veggie/ vegan would shoot up astronomically!
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Why is the suffering and killing of animals wrong? Because the value of a sentient organism's life is priceless. They are their own beings and have their own lives and loves. They have higher emotions and thought processes. Their minds are different from ours in degree, not kind - meaning that fundamentally there are critical similarities.
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#24 Old 01-16-2015, 03:02 PM
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"If slaughterhouses had glass walls, everyone would be a vegetarian."

Paul McCartney
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Why is the suffering and killing of animals wrong? Because the value of a sentient organism's life is priceless. They are their own beings and have their own lives and loves. They have higher emotions and thought processes. Their minds are different from ours in degree, not kind - meaning that fundamentally there are critical similarities.
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#25 Old 01-17-2015, 07:55 AM
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"If slaughterhouses had glass walls, everyone would be a vegetarian."

Paul McCartney

This is the reason I turned veggie in the first place!


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#26 Old 01-17-2015, 01:50 PM
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This is the reason I turned veggie in the first place!


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Macca was right then
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#27 Old 02-14-2016, 10:56 PM
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"If slaughterhouses had glass walls, everyone would be a vegetarian."

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#28 Old 02-19-2016, 10:50 PM
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I think I need that shirt in my life. :/

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