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-   -   I knew it was gonna happen :( (https://www.veggieboards.com/forum/60-vegan-support-forum/141667-i-knew-gonna-happen.html)

sam alshebany 06-28-2013 12:08 PM

guys i need help my sisters are trying to convince my to ge back to eating meat milk.....

 

today techenically she is a vegetarian not a vegan anymore 

 

she eats the bread that has milk in it 

 

and then my sister yells and she said if being vegan is good then why did ivana get sick on it and then i said Ivana is a carnivore and she said go away please i need help


'IckenNoodleSoup 06-28-2013 12:18 PM

Just don't argue with them about it.

Tell them you won't argue about it.

Just keep doing what you want and let them do the same.


sam alshebany 06-28-2013 12:23 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by 'IckenNoodleSoup View Post

Just don't argue with them about it.

Tell them you won't argue about it.

Just keep doing what you want and let them do the same.

bt i i regret doing one thing is that today my sister was like oh god how would you do this to a mother take away her child "my sister's child was taken by her father to another country" now i know it's sad bt i exploded when she said if being vegan is good then why did ivana get sick on it  i can't help myself i know it's bad reputation bt i said you are doing the same to mothers everyday "milk and calves taken away and turned into veal" then she said go away 

 

now i love my sisters bt i can't stand seeing them stand next to cruelty as something okay i am very disappointed


60225 06-28-2013 12:48 PM

If I read it right and your sister has had her child taken from her then I'm not surprised she told you to go away.   

 

Focus on yourself instead of others for the time-being.  Do what you can and don't worry about the others around you, it sounds like they don't/won't appreciate additional pressure at the moment.

 

I hope you don't mind me asking Sam, but how old are you?  


sam alshebany 06-28-2013 12:54 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Quiet-Vegan View Post

If I read it right and your sister has had her child taken from her then I'm not surprised she told you to go away.   

 

Focus on yourself instead of others for the time-being.  Do what you can and don't worry about the others around you, it sounds like they don't/won't appreciate additional pressure at the moment.

 

I hope you don't mind me asking Sam, but how old are you?  

19 i know it's hard bt she is asking god how can you do this to a mother aren't cows moms are the calves take away to be tuerned into veal now i know it's hard on her and i hope that she gets her child back bt i am thinking if she gets her back and keeps on doing the same thing to cows...


LedBoots 06-28-2013 12:59 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by sam alshebany View Post

guys i need help my sisters are trying to convince my to ge back to eating meat milk.....

 

today techenically she is a vegetarian not a vegan anymore 

 

she eats the bread that has milk in it 

 

and then my sister yells and she said if being vegan is good then why did ivana get sick on it and then i said Ivana is a carnivore and she said go away please i need help

Sam, it is really none of your business what your sister eats or doesn't eat. I am disappointed that you would say such a cruel thing to her for a second time.

Please just take care of yourself and the companion animals you take responsibility for. Honestly, so you think causing your sister suffering is helpful?

Kath 06-28-2013 01:26 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by sam alshebany View Post

19 i know it's hard bt she is asking god how can you do this to a mother aren't cows moms are the calves take away to be tuerned into veal now i know it's hard on her and i hope that she gets her child back bt i am thinking if she gets her back and keeps on doing the same thing to cows...

If she keeps on doing the same things to cows...what?

 

The fact cows suffer does not for a second take away from the pain your sister must be in. Yeah you can think she's a hypocrite but it seems unthinkably cruel and insensitive to choose this moment to tell her that. You won't win many compassion points for failing to be loving towards your own suffering sister.


60225 06-28-2013 01:31 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by sam alshebany View Post

i know it's hard bt she is asking god how can you do this to a mother aren't cows moms are the calves take away to be tuerned into veal.

 

Yes they are but as (a) a vegan and (b) a mother the simple fact is that my child is more important to me than anyone else's.  It's called maternal instinct and it's pretty much necessary for the survival of any species.  You're lucky she just told you to go away to be honest.


sam alshebany 06-28-2013 01:56 PM

guys i didnt say anything when she was talking to god i said it when she was trying to turn my mother back to milk


Kath 06-28-2013 02:03 PM

Sam it doesn't matter exactly what point you said it, this is a bad time in general for her and it would be much more compassionate to not criticise her at the moment with this going on for her.


Kath 06-28-2013 02:05 PM

I can understand it must be hard when she criticises you and if she is doing it, starting attacks first then that's really wrong of her but she's having a tough time and it's a sensitive issue for her right now.


sam alshebany 06-28-2013 02:41 PM

guys i regret saying this to her bt sometimes i can't control myself i would love to know how to control myself?


CrazyApple 06-28-2013 02:46 PM

If you want someone to respect what is important to you, you also have to show some respect to that person. It's obvious to everyone that veganism is a huge part of your life, and that's fantastic, but if you want your sister to take the time and hear where you're coming from, you CAN NOT say such mean and hurtful things to her. Now, most likely, she won't want to hear anything you have to say.

 

 I hope you apologize to her for what you said.


sam alshebany 06-28-2013 03:24 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by CrazyApple View Post

If you want someone to respect what is important to you, you also have to show some respect to that person. It's obvious to everyone that veganism is a huge part of your life, and that's fantastic, but if you want your sister to take the time and hear where you're coming from, you CAN NOT say such mean and hurtful things to her. Now, most likely, she won't want to hear anything you have to say.

 

 I hope you apologize to her for what you said.

i want to apologize bt i don't know what to tell her plus i don't wanna tell her that basically eating meat and drinking milk is okay?


CrazyApple 06-28-2013 03:45 PM

Consuming meat & milk is not what you have to talk to her about. What you said to her about her child is what needs to be addressed. Let this argument pass before you start talking about your feelings and beliefs again.

 

Also, if you're frustrated to the point where you're going to say something hurtful, it's time to walk away. Go for a walk & keep your distance until your temper cools down.


silva 06-28-2013 03:49 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by sam alshebany View Post

i want to apologize bt i don't know what to tell her plus i don't wanna tell her that basically eating meat and drinking milk is okay?

You don't need to tell her eating animal products is okay-- you don't need to tell her how to live her life. She's aware of your concerns, and the fact that she's still a vegetarian is to be highly commended!

Honestly, as a mother myself, I don't know how I'd react if my baby was taken, and I might not get him back. I don't think I could worry about eating or not eating animals at that point. At least not as a new vegetarian.

There are certain points in life where you just have to do what you can to keep your own sanity. There were times I lapsed from vegan when OCD became too much.

 

You should realize we all have struggles. Animal rights is very important to you, other things are very important to other people. No one is perfect, and no one can do everything. Sometimes you have to relax and live and let live.

 

You should ask your sister to forgive your insensitive remark. Her child is the world to her.


60225 06-28-2013 03:51 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by sam alshebany View Post

i want to apologize bt i don't know what to tell her plus i don't wanna tell her that basically eating meat and drinking milk is okay?

 

Nobody is saying you have to tell her that eating meat/dairy is okay - in fact, please don't mention it at all.  Just tell her you are sorry for upsetting her, that you love her and that you didn't mean to cause her pain.


sam alshebany 06-28-2013 04:03 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by silva View Post

You don't need to tell her eating animal products is okay-- you don't need to tell her how to live her life. She's aware of your concerns, and the fact that she's still a vegetarian is to be highly commended!

Honestly, as a mother myself, I don't know how I'd react if my baby was taken, and I might not get him back. I don't think I could worry about eating or not eating animals at that point. At least not as a new vegetarian.

There are certain points in life where you just have to do what you can to keep your own sanity. There were times I lapsed from vegan when OCD became too much.

 

You should realize we all have struggles. Animal rights is very important to you, other things are very important to other people. No one is perfect, and no one can do everything. Sometimes you have to relax and live and let live.

 

You should ask your sister to forgive your insensitive remark. Her child is the world to her.

she's not a vegetarian my mom is 


Diana 06-29-2013 06:53 AM

sam: how old are you exactly ?


60225 06-29-2013 08:04 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Diana View Post

sam: how old are you exactly ?

 

I did ask this earlier in the thread; Sam replied that he is 19.


sam alshebany 06-29-2013 09:18 AM

guys i apologized to my sister i said that i know what your going through right now is awful and i am sorry 

 

 

i feel much better now and i have got to stop fighting and show people that vegans are not mean


sam alshebany 06-29-2013 09:19 AM

Guys please take a look at this conversation and let me know if i handled it well? here https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=651945454834838&set=a.102190249810364.5364.100000581677925&type=1&theater&notif_t=like

 

thank you


60225 06-29-2013 10:00 AM

Well done for apologising to your sister, I hope that your relationship with her benefits from it :)

 

So far I think you have handled the Facebook discussion well.  I wouldn't overplay the 'child/veal' connection as people stop listening when the analogies get too extreme. 


sam alshebany 06-29-2013 10:48 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Quiet-Vegan View Post

Well done for apologising to your sister, I hope that your relationship with her benefits from it :)

 

So far I think you have handled the Facebook discussion well.  I wouldn't overplay the 'child/veal' connection as people stop listening when the analogies get too extreme. 

i learned from you guys is that if someone is intrested in saving lives they will not make any excuses so when people start making excuses like "when you make a lion eat grass i'll go vegan" i just leave them alone and spend time on the ones who are willing to transition is that good?


jumpingspider22 06-29-2013 12:34 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by silva View Post

You don't need to tell her eating animal products is okay-- you don't need to tell her how to live her life. She's aware of your concerns, and the fact that she's still a vegetarian is to be highly commended!

Honestly, as a mother myself, I don't know how I'd react if my baby was taken, and I might not get him back. I don't think I could worry about eating or not eating animals at that point. At least not as a new vegetarian.

There are certain points in life where you just have to do what you can to keep your own sanity. There were times I lapsed from vegan when OCD became too much.

 

You should realize we all have struggles. Animal rights is very important to you, other things are very important to other people. No one is perfect, and no one can do everything. Sometimes you have to relax and live and let live.

 

You should ask your sister to forgive your insensitive remark. Her child is the world to her.

silva,

I have been feeling this weird connection to you, ever since we posted together on the "vegan catfood" forum. So many of the things you say sound a lot like me--I've noticed this in lots of other threads. Now I learn that you too struggle with OCD. I have dealt with it since I was a child.

 

Just wanted to say that.



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