Eat to Live VII: Eating Disorder Recovery Support - Page 58 - VeggieBoards
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#1711 Old 11-22-2013, 07:22 PM
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Thank you will do piratemoon smiley.gif you do the same! xx
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#1712 Old 12-12-2013, 07:28 AM
 
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These tips are very helpful. I think following these tips could help me get back on track. 
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#1713 Old 01-18-2014, 07:49 PM
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I'm not sure if it's a good thing or a bad one that this thread has become inactive..
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#1714 Old 01-19-2014, 03:53 AM
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I am struggling very much with my eating disorder at present, but I am not in a good position right now to work on recovery.  I am just trying to survive my last semester of school and pass a certification exam before I can really work on myself any more than I am (just fighting to keep my sanity and be as healthy as I can under the circumstances). I have been wanting to finally accomplish a college degree for twenty two years and I am not taking another hiatus until I am done!  I am just too close.

 

 I am so totally overwhelmed with everything though.  But I tend to like to keep that part of my life separated from vegetarian boards for various reasons.  I am very passionate about animal rights but the minute others find out I struggle with an eating disorder it becomes all about that and all the work I have done for animal rights and veganism is discredited.  I am taking a huge risk just saying that publicly here.  I have been wanting to write on this thread though, and I am grateful for the people who have shared here so I know that I am not alone in my struggles.  

 

How are you doing PerfectxDefect?


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#1715 Old 01-21-2014, 05:40 PM
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The fact that I have no vegan food at the moment. Or acsess to money does not help. I am in betwen jobs ( several applications put in) but I haven't had food since the day before yesterday and I don't know when I will eat again. My blood sugar is so low (I have hypoglycemia) I just need someone that cares. This life Is destroying me. I finally get half way better and my family spits in my face with saying I get no food. I am getting fat
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#1716 Old 01-21-2014, 06:07 PM
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:'( I care, I want to help .... I looked up a food bank locator that you put in your zip code and they will have some food banks close by for you .... do you have neighbours or friends close by?
http://m.feedingamerica.org/foodbank-results.aspx
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#1717 Old 01-21-2014, 06:13 PM
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Lavender, I have no friends. I tried the shelters/food banks. They couldn't help. Too much sorrow around where i live for me to descripe.
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#1718 Old 01-21-2014, 06:15 PM
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Thank you for caring.. my family is sorta awful.. but they hurt my animals so I stay for them.
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#1719 Old 01-21-2014, 06:27 PM
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If I can help in anyway possible I will! I am your friend and veggieboards is filled many awesome caring friends too! ~*hugs*~
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#1720 Old 01-21-2014, 08:23 PM
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You are a wonderful person, Lavender Phase. I really couldn't ask anything of anyone..I am more concerned with what my cats will have to eat.
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#1721 Old 01-21-2014, 09:39 PM
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Thank you! You're a wonderful person as well smiley.gif I know my four kittys love my vegan deli meats if you can somehow purchase vegan deli meats you can feed yourself and your kittys .... I am worried though about a change in their diet however at least they as well as you won't be hungry ....
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#1722 Old 01-21-2014, 10:51 PM
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Vegan deli meats are $4 a lb though they love them! I have 0.45cent...
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#1723 Old 01-21-2014, 11:29 PM
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:'( ok you need to get to get help for yourself and the kittys perhaps a place of worship they will not judge you or a food bank or an emergency assistance please! In the meantime buy a banana or two and share with your kittys they are not toxic for cats two of mine love a bite or two ....
http://pets.thenest.com/human-foods-safe-cats-6000.html
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#1724 Old 01-22-2014, 02:07 AM
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PerfectxDefect,

 

I'm sorry you are struggling so much!  HUGS.  You are worthy of love and help.  I hope you can reach out to one of those places lavender phase mentioned.  I have had to do it myself so I understand.  We care about you here too ok?  You are never alone.


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#1725 Old 01-29-2014, 09:26 AM
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im really struggling with the weight gain from recovery :( so iv started going on a diet to loose weight, which i think is healthy enough but now my therapist is getting really pushy and saying i cant do it and this isnt good enough :(  im just stressed at food.

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#1726 Old 03-07-2014, 01:38 PM
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I'm looking for a little support now. My anxiety level has been so high for the last 3 days that I've barely eaten anything. I physically can't eat and my anorexic thoughts from my teenage years are creeping back. It's SO easy to not eat once you stop for a few days. I have no appetite, just fatigue. I'm sipping small amounts of coffee and tea. It's not sadness, it's anxiety. I already had one panic attack 2 days ago.

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#1727 Old 03-07-2014, 02:31 PM
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Oh scully, I'm so sorry to hear you are going through this (((hugs)))

 

I fully identify with the not eating for a few days thing.  If I've been stressed/upset and off my food I find it really difficult to kick start my appetite again.  I think the physical feeling of emptiness resonates with the emotional emptiness and it feels weirdly good.  I also find that my taste buds become hyper-sensitive and most foods make me gag so even the though of eating can make me feel sick.  Can you try and introduce small amounts of neutral tasting foods (toast with a small amount of spread for example) and try to build up from there?

 

Have you tried meditation or self-hypnosis?  Guided relaxation always helps me when my anxiety levels go through the roof ~ you can find downloads on the internet.

 

You are too important to too many people and animals to allow yourself to go down that road again x

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#1728 Old 03-07-2014, 02:38 PM
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I'm looking for a little support now. My anxiety level has been so high for the last 3 days that I've barely eaten anything. I physically can't eat and my anorexic thoughts from my teenage years are creeping back. It's SO easy to not eat once you stop for a few days. I have no appetite, just fatigue. I'm sipping small amounts of coffee and tea. It's not sadness, it's anxiety. I already had one panic attack 2 days ago.

Not much I can say (as I've never had this kind of problem) except that you're very much in my thoughts at this time, danakscully.:up: 

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#1729 Old 03-07-2014, 05:40 PM
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Danakscully64, I'm sorry you're going through a hard time. Here's a few tricks to help with panic (I've had panic disorder since childhood). For acute panic attacks, when it starts, cup your hands around your mouth/nose and breathe normally. Usually people are unknowingly hyperventilating when they get anxious, and the excess oxygen causes or contributes to some physical symptoms like racing heart and sweating. So by breathing into your hands for a couple of minutes, you can lessen the troubling scary symptoms.

Also really try meditation. You can do walking meditation, guided meditation, it doesn't matter. There's tons of good stuff online free. It's best to meditate when your anxiety isn't really bad. It's more a preventive than a cure.

Yoga is the best thing too. Even just watching yoga and doing the breathing and just a few of the warm ups can be really relaxing.

Make a list of all the things tot haven't done because of your anxiety and pick one easy thing to do so you can cross it off. Just one. <3

And maybe you could try just a little juice and see how it goes?
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#1730 Old 03-29-2014, 07:47 AM
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Originally Posted by danakscully64 View Post

I'm looking for a little support now. My anxiety level has been so high for the last 3 days that I've barely eaten anything. I physically can't eat and my anorexic thoughts from my teenage years are creeping back. It's SO easy to not eat once you stop for a few days. I have no appetite, just fatigue. I'm sipping small amounts of coffee and tea. It's not sadness, it's anxiety. I already had one panic attack 2 days ago.
hug.gif I hope you're feeling better now.

"you know, nowhere in the bible does it say that jesus was not a raptor"


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#1731 Old 04-02-2014, 12:37 PM
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Thank you for the support. I've been doing much better.

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#1732 Old 04-14-2014, 09:13 AM
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Good danakscully64.

 

Erm. I dunno. I'm just feeling as though I am useless at the moment. My partner rarely eats breakfast (at least at home), and I tried to get him to have some toast this morning, because his lunches can be a little messed up because of his job, and I don't want him to starve. He only ate half of it, and then said he was full. This made me really, irrationally angry, and I know he wasn't doing it to upset me, and that I can't expect him to force himself to eat when he isn't hungry for my sake, but it really upset me. I've been compete-eating too - I have to eat less than other people at dinner, when I'm eating with them, and if they leave food, even if I am hungry still, I have to too. 

 

I thought I was over this but it appears I am not. I hate myself at the moment and just...urgh. I want to punish myself, for being weak and disgusting and a failure. 

 

No job, no house (living with the in-laws). 

 

I tried so hard. And what did it get me? A chance to moan and flail in self pity.  

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#1733 Old 04-14-2014, 03:14 PM
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Good danakscully64.

 

Erm. I dunno. I'm just feeling as though I am useless at the moment. My partner rarely eats breakfast (at least at home), and I tried to get him to have some toast this morning, because his lunches can be a little messed up because of his job, and I don't want him to starve. He only ate half of it, and then said he was full. This made me really, irrationally angry, and I know he wasn't doing it to upset me, and that I can't expect him to force himself to eat when he isn't hungry for my sake, but it really upset me. I've been compete-eating too - I have to eat less than other people at dinner, when I'm eating with them, and if they leave food, even if I am hungry still, I have to too. 

 

I thought I was over this but it appears I am not. I hate myself at the moment and just...urgh. I want to punish myself, for being weak and disgusting and a failure. 

 

No job, no house (living with the in-laws). 

 

I tried so hard. And what did it get me? A chance to moan and flail in self pity.  

 

I don't think we ever completely get over it, I think it will always be there. Do you have a professional you can talk to?

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#1734 Old 04-14-2014, 11:39 PM
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I think you're probably right, Dana. No, I don't - I was discharged some time ago now, which was possibly a great thing.

I am sorry I haven't been much around. Life is complicated and busy at the moment.
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#1735 Old 04-15-2014, 01:31 AM
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I have  anorexia, i suffer from it. I am trying to get better, at least I thought I was. Yesterday I had a major set back when a friend of mine( a guy ) up and left me after two years for some one that they had met four months, ago, also telling me  I had too much baggage meaning my anoriexia, also  him accusing me of being depressed but i am not that. anyway   To even think about having a normal meal is just so scary.  I count calories all the time. I  want to eat but I cant. 

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#1736 Old 04-15-2014, 01:48 AM
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It's really hard Khadijah. Especially when something hard happens to us. I can only offer you support. You are allowed to eat. I know that that is not always a helpful thing to say, but it is the only thing I can. You are allowed. Even if you count calories, that's OK - sometimes, it's helpful. But you have to control it, not let it control you.

And that's REALLY hard to learn. I know, I've been there.

I hope you are able to get over the problem with your friend soon. Sometimes, people leave, and it isn't because we are bad or they are bad - it's just that things are becoming toxic. Sometimes, no one is to blame.

Peace and love,

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#1737 Old 04-15-2014, 08:58 AM
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Yeah I think for the most part he is done, he has blocked me, from fb, and even from this group were I met him. he does not know how much I hurt over it and does not seem to care. I guess he did not want to hear what I had to say. He even told me me could never be with anyone like me because of my baggage and when I asked him why he was like your ED and your cutting . anyway I guess he made his choice  and I guess our friend ship was never that important as he said. anyway.I guess I will live.

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#1738 Old 04-15-2014, 11:12 AM
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I have  anorexia, i suffer from it. I am trying to get better, at least I thought I was. Yesterday I had a major set back when a friend of mine( a guy ) up and left me after two years for some one that they had met four months, ago, also telling me  I had too much baggage meaning my anoriexia, also  him accusing me of being depressed but i am not that. anyway   To even think about having a normal meal is just so scary.  I count calories all the time. I  want to eat but I cant. 

Wow, he's an a-hole. You deserve a much better person in your life. You really should speak with a professional. Have you met with a counselor recently? 

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#1739 Old 04-15-2014, 11:42 AM
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no I actually havent, I  do not currently live in USA right now.   I  would like to speak to some one but I dont  know I havent checked if they have anyoe here that would be capable of that here.  I dont care for the doctors here much. Yeah  Im hurt by what he said, I mean, I was concerned for him and do not want to see him hurt,  as I feel this other person is using him. The worse thing about it  hes a VB member here.  I mean  our friend ship was really special to me, because I do not have many friends  I thought we had connected,we shared things, we each other that even some of my family do not know.And  him to do that not so much as even an email, text nothing, IT hurts like hell, but I guess I will have to move on. 

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#1740 Old 04-16-2014, 12:13 AM
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Im starting to freak out about this whole situation. Im trying to pull my self together but  I can, I had a panick attack yesterday. And I havent been able to sleep in days, I cant stop crying, he does not realize what this had  done to  to me it has thrown me fully back in to my ed habits and yesterday I felt the earge to cut and I have not done this in a long time.  Im not good enough for anyone, or anything . Everytime I find some one that I think I  can trust it just back fires and they leave. I know I need to move on  but Im having a hard time . I think Im just going to take a break from online, for a few days to see if I an get my thoughts in order.  But before I just I just wanted to tell you all that Im here for you all and support you, and I know excatly what you are going threw because I am  dealing with it or have dealt with it. 

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