Why do skinny people do this?! (Say they're fat in front of 'larger' people.) - Page 3 - VeggieBoards
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#61 Old 04-04-2010, 09:33 AM
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I'm having a little trouble believing my weight loss myself. I keep expecting it to be a joke. I am not buying anything new for awhile. I will just have to wear my big stuff for a while, it might help me to believe that it is real.



I will always try to be understanding to anyone who is unhappy with their weight or looks. We all have something we are insecure about. I am doing my best to be a compassionate being to all, even though it is a struggle at times.
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#62 Old 04-04-2010, 09:39 AM
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Originally Posted by crimmsonne View Post

I'm having a little trouble believing my weight loss myself. I keep expecting it to be a joke. I am not buying anything new for awhile. I will just have to wear my big stuff for a while, it might help me to believe that it is real.



I will always try to be understanding to anyone who is unhappy with their weight or looks. We all have something we are insecure about. I am doing my best to be a compassionate being to all, even though it is a struggle at times.



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#63 Old 04-06-2010, 06:00 AM
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Originally Posted by Alicia Avocado View Post

.



I'm thinking next week if they bring it up again, I'm going to tell them that I really don't wish to hear about it anymore as it's a sensitive issue for me and that if they think they are fat then they should talk to their doctor. I'm just fricking done with it all....I am sick of seeing them try and find fat to pinch and asking me if I think they need to lose some.



It sounds like it's a sensitive issue for them too. Everyone probably has some kind of "ideal" weight they'd like to be so everyone has these insecurities. It doesn't make a difference what size you are.
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#64 Old 04-11-2010, 03:19 PM
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First I'd like to say, if this is considered the most annoying thing ever, you've lived a pretty charmed life



Second, most women struggle with their weight. No one is 100% comfortable with how they look 100% of the time. There are days I "feel fat" and say so admitedly, I do not look around and make sure the coast is clear when I do so if I did, that would mean I am targeting other people when I am only speaking for myself. I do not judge others for what they look like, it is just how I feel, be it bloated or what have you.



Thin people get comments just as over weight people do. I do not consider myself "thin" by any means, I have an athletic build but people are constantly making over my weight and diet choices. Why does society think it is okay to refer to someone as skinny but not chubby? Why is it anyones business what somebody else looks like?



No one can make you feel anything, it is all up to you and it is not right to project your issues with your body image onto someone else and expect them to edit accordingly. People reserve the right to feel and be fat!
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#65 Old 04-11-2010, 05:08 PM
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In my case it's the opposite, I rarely talk about weights/dieting or bring up vegetarianism, my former colleagues many times mentioned how big they are and then talk about my being slim and reference vegetariansm. It'd annoyed me alot because 1) I don't like hearing people not being happy with themselves and 2) my being vegetarian has little to do with what I look like. I'd always try to encourage people to be happy with themselves and try to tell them that a larger person can look good and be attractive it's all about how you dress and present yourself.

May be in your case you can be sarcastic for once and say that yes they are really fat and see how they respnd to it. Sorry to hear you have to put up with something like this on a regular basis.
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#66 Old 04-13-2010, 01:22 PM
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Originally Posted by AspireToInspire View Post

First I'd like to say, if this is considered the most annoying thing ever, you've lived a pretty charmed life



Second, most women struggle with their weight. No one is 100% comfortable with how they look 100% of the time. There are days I "feel fat" and say so admitedly, I do not look around and make sure the coast is clear when I do so if I did, that would mean I am targeting other people when I am only speaking for myself. I do not judge others for what they look like, it is just how I feel, be it bloated or what have you.



Thin people get comments just as over weight people do. I do not consider myself "thin" by any means, I have an athletic build but people are constantly making over my weight and diet choices. Why does society think it is okay to refer to someone as skinny but not chubby? Why is it anyones business what somebody else looks like?



No one can make you feel anything, it is all up to you and it is not right to project your issues with your body image onto someone else and expect them to edit accordingly. People reserve the right to feel and be fat!



I'm with you. People can feel however they want about their own bodies. If a person is talking about herself and it bothers YOU, that says more about you then it does her. Not every "skinny" person who talks about weight issues is fishing for compliments. I'm not saying people like that don't exist. I've encountered them before just like everyone else has. They ARE annoying, but that is a personality trait and doesn't really have anything to do with whether the person is overweight or not. If they weren't complaining about their weight they'd be complaining about something else. I've been self conscience about my body for years, and there have been times when I've talked with other people about it. I wasn't fishing for complements either. I was trying to relate to them. It is possible for a person to feel self conscience and "fat" even when they're around other people who are "fatter".



As with any situation the result depends on your approach. There is clearly a difference between trying relate to a person with a similar problem and just whining about how "fat" you are. I say this because while I AM overweight I have had people tell me that I'm not. Do I want people to tell me that I'm fat? No, not really, but sometimes it's a little disheartening when people seem to think I can't understand where they're coming from even though I am probably a lot more self conscience than they are.
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#67 Old 04-20-2010, 03:33 PM
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Originally Posted by AspireToInspire View Post

No one is 100% comfortable with how they look 100% of the time.

This.

I am very thin and until recently, I always had very low self esteem. I admit that I am guilty of complaining about my weight, just for reassurance I suppose. But when I used to do this, I rarely paid attention to the size of the person I was complaining to. It was always just about me, and my own insecurities.

(I stopped when I realized how truly annoying and whiny I sounded, and when I accepted the fact that I am in fact very thin).
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#68 Old 05-05-2010, 01:34 PM
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It's selfish and inconsiderate. There are people with serious problems who keep them a secret for years. If you're that insecure, you don't bring everyones attention to it. There are two girls on my course at college who spend at least an hour every day [not exaggerating] moaning about their weight, diet and exercise as loudly as possible when about half the class are larger than them, before going to McDonalds for lunch.



Gahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
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#69 Old 05-05-2010, 01:55 PM
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Originally Posted by shannonbananen View Post

It's gotten to the point where if they complain about how fat they are, I just agree. They get mad for a while, but what do they expect when they complain all the time about something that doesn't even warrant complaining?!?!

Brilliant. I do this too. Clearly if you're skinny, you know you're skinny so stop fishing for compliments because I'm just going to openly mock you and agree with your ridiculous comments. Sorry, I'm very anti-needy girls with a flair for a attention whoooore-ishness.

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#70 Old 05-05-2010, 02:56 PM
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I just went through something this weekend that was kind of similar to this. I am average sized I think, I am not fat but I wouldn't really throw myself in with the naturally really thin either. This weekend I went to a baseball game and had to eat crap because we were out all day, then I drank a lot of beer, and ate more crap all night. It was a party night with family and a lot of fun. However, the next day we went to the beach and I was SO uncomfortable. I do not complain about my weight that often, even when I am trying to cut back on junk or whatever, but I did complain about how I felt terrible that day and did not take off my sundress at all.



It had nothing to do with other people around me. I felt fat, I said it. I know I am not obese or clinically fat- but that doesn't change that I have bad days too. I wasn't asking anyone to tell me I wasn't, and they did I think, but it meant nothing to me and was not why I was mentioning my feeling bloated/awful. I think it was all the beer that did it, I really don't drink very often.



However, they do sound like *****es to be commenting on your weight compared to other people they know etc..
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#71 Old 05-05-2010, 03:54 PM
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Originally Posted by Vegan Wannabe View Post

Brilliant. I do this too. Clearly if you're skinny, you know you're skinny so stop fishing for compliments because I'm just going to openly mock you and agree with your ridiculous comments. Sorry, I'm very anti-needy girls with a flair for a attention whoooore-ishness.



Out of curiosity, what happens when you end up agreeing?
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#72 Old 05-06-2010, 01:30 PM
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Originally Posted by _sharon View Post

Out of curiosity, what happens when you end up agreeing?



shock and awe. and it usually puts an end to it.



i do understand that EVERYONE has insecurities and we are all entitled to feel and express ourselves in any way we choose, but some people just do it merely for attention and those people kinda sorta bug me.

Our Generation has had no Great war, no Great Depression. Our war is spiritual. Our depression is our lives.
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#73 Old 05-15-2010, 08:25 PM
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I once worked with a girl who was constantly talking about how "bad" she looked and how "fat" she was, even though she was rail-thin and did modeling work on the side. I figured she was fishing for compliments. The next time she said, "Ohmigosh I feel like a total COW I look so BAD today!" I replied, "Yeah, you really do. What happened?" She was dumbfounded and never talked that way in front of me again.
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#74 Old 05-15-2010, 10:20 PM
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i replied, "yeah, you really do. What happened?" she was dumbfounded and never talked that way in front of me again.



lol
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#75 Old 05-16-2010, 09:41 AM
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Insecurity. At least in my case. When I was in college I lost a ton of weight and was borderline anorexic. At 104 pounds, with my abdomen a full inch inside my hipbones, I looked in a mirror and saw a fat girl. I look at pictures from that time and I was skinny as a rail. My brother yelled at me to eat and I just couldn't. BUT, I was very insecure, thinking I was obese, and would often comment on it. Fishing for compliments? Perhaps. But inside my mind I was all twisted up with a very confused and inaccurate body image. I've gotten over it, and now have weight to lose. But I try to remember how I felt then, and feel compassion for others. We never know what's going on in their heads. Does it hurt others? Yes. But try to remember that it isn't personal. When I was that way, I never saw others as fat. Only me. A tiny part of my rational brain could see that folks who were much larger than I looked great. But inside my head it was, "yeah, but *I* look hideous." Weird, twisted, and sad, in hindsight.

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#76 Old 05-17-2010, 01:58 PM
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To you. They may be skinny. To themselves, they may honestly still think they need to lose a few pounds.
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#77 Old 06-22-2010, 11:03 PM
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agree with them. They'll realize they're being stupid!



them:"Oh im so fat"

You: "Yeah, you are. maybe try cutting back on the _______"

them" *omg im not actually fat. what a meanie*



it works. ive done it before and they never again talked about how large they think they are.
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#78 Old 06-22-2010, 11:35 PM
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you need to get over this - thinking one is fat is relative to how one wants to look or how they looked in the past - say in college, it is not some absolute measurement or something relative to the heaviest person in the room.





Simply put - they do it because they have completely different standards than "larger" people do with regard to weight and looks - one standard isn't better or worse they are just different. Some strive to look "skinny" like "them" - whomever they are - but those people may yet want to be thinner.
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#79 Old 06-23-2010, 09:47 AM
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Originally Posted by suchgreatheight' date='23 June 2010 - 01:35 AM' timestamp='1277271319' post='2663239 View Post


you need to get over this - thinking one is fat is relative to how one wants to look or how they looked in the past - say in college, it is not some absolute measurement or something relative to the heaviest person in the room.





Simply put - they do it because they have completely different standards than "larger" people do with regard to weight and looks - one standard isn't better or worse they are just different. Some strive to look "skinny" like "them" - whomever they are - but those people may yet want to be thinner.



I agree with this. I was always one of those people who could eat anything and in embarrassingly large quantities without putting on weight. Once I got older though, my metabolism slowed down and, in fairly quick measure, I had packed some extra weight on my tum and butt. It was like I woke up one morning after getting zapped by the fat fairy in my sleep and all of a sudden I couldn't zip my pants comfortably. As someone who has never had to 'diet' I was practically panicking. I honestly had no idea how to go about having to lose the weight, how long it would take, etc. Of course my situation wasn't anywhere near as bad as someone who has had to struggle their whole life with weight issues but, to me, it was kind of scary because it was entirely unknown territory.



I can see how someone who had far more weight to lose might think I was fishing for compliments anytime I'd moan about my few extra pounds but that was hardly my intention nor would I want to make someone else feel badly if they contrasted their weight loss goals with mine. Even at my heaviest I was still fairly 'skinny' I guess but I simply wasn't happy with what I was seeing happen to my own body.

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#80 Old 06-23-2010, 11:05 AM
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Wow, I can't believe how much people sound like they lash out on this board.....what's it to you if someone says they feel fat? Why take it so personally?





I see no disadvantage to trying to cheer someone up if they are feeling bad about themselves in any respect, weight, hair, whatever. If they were fishing for compliments only and didn't really believe the adjectives they were using to describe themselves, it didn't HURT you to be nice to them. It's not like you're giving yourself up to compliment another. It always amazes me when people don't have anything nice to say and/or can't put themselves in that person's shoes. I have had many friends who are normally happy but maybe one day a month feel down on themselves physically. I focus on their good points, as any reflective, good-natured, and positive person would do......I think if their thoughts about themselves bother you that much, it's more a reflection on you and how you feel about yourself. I can't imagine jumping on one of my friends about "how bad they look" if they were feeling self-conscious. What kind of bullies does this board draw in?
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#81 Old 06-23-2010, 02:05 PM
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Originally Posted by penny79' date='24 June 2010 - 04:05 AM' timestamp='1277312702' post='2663486 View Post


Wow, I can't believe how much people sound like they lash out on this board.....what's it to you if someone says they feel fat? Why take it so personally?





My thoughts exactly.



Quote:

I see no disadvantage to trying to cheer someone up if they are feeling bad about themselves in any respect, weight, hair, whatever. If they were fishing for compliments only and didn't really believe the adjectives they were using to describe themselves, it didn't HURT you to be nice to them. It's not like you're giving yourself up to compliment another. It always amazes me when people don't have anything nice to say and/or can't put themselves in that person's shoes. I have had many friends who are normally happy but maybe one day a month feel down on themselves physically. I focus on their good points, as any reflective, good-natured, and positive person would do......I think if their thoughts about themselves bother you that much, it's more a reflection on you and how you feel about yourself. I can't imagine jumping on one of my friends about "how bad they look" if they were feeling self-conscious. What kind of bullies does this board draw in?



I'd add to this but there is no real need to. +1 for this. I'm surprised at the amount of people that immediately think "hey, lets say something mean and hurtful, that will be funny".

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