New Drugs for Women - VeggieBoards
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#1 Old 12-16-2004, 02:13 PM
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New Drugs for Women



D A M N I T O L

Take 2 and the rest of the world can go to hell for up to 8 full hours.



ST. M O M M A'S W O R T

Plant extract that treats mom's depression by rendering preschoolers unconscious for up to two days.



E M P T Y N E S T R O G E N

Suppository that eliminates melancholy and loneliness by reminding

you of how awful they were as teenagers and how you couldn't wait till they moved out.



P E P T O B I M B O

Liquid silicone drink for single women. Two full cups swallowed before an evening out increases breast size, decreases intelligence, and prevents conception.



D U M B E R O L

When taken with Peptobimbo, can cause dangerously low IQ, resulting in enjoyment of country music and pickup trucks.



F L I P I T O R

Increases life expectancy of commuters by controlling road rage and the urge to flip off other drivers.



M E N I C I L L I N

Potent anti-boy-otic for older women. Increases resistance to such lethal lines as, "You make me want to be a better person ..Can we get naked now?.



BUYAGRA

Injectable stimulant taken prior to shopping Increases potency, duration, and credit limit of spending spree.



J A C K A S S P I R I N

Relieves headache caused by a man who can't remember your birthday, anniversary, phone number, or to lift the toilet seat.



A N T I-T A L K S I D E N T

A spray carried in a purse or wallet to be used on anyone too eager to share their life stories with total strangers in elevators.





N A G A M E N T

When administered to a boyfriend or husband, provides the same irritation level as nagging him
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#2 Old 12-16-2004, 02:16 PM
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WHEW! I needed a good laugh! Thanks!
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#3 Old 12-16-2004, 05:20 PM
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teehee. you just made my afternoon.
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#4 Old 12-17-2004, 12:36 AM
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I thought thi was serious at first. I was wondering where I could find Damnitol.
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#5 Old 12-17-2004, 01:50 AM
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Hehe- very funny
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#6 Old 12-17-2004, 05:19 AM
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I seriously need some Flipitor before there's a shootout.
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#7 Old 12-17-2004, 06:31 AM
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I'll buy the store
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#8 Old 12-17-2004, 09:06 AM
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Yes one of each please, except the one that will make me like country music and pickup trucks.
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