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#1 Old 01-20-2009, 05:51 PM
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Eh.. so i have been a vegetarian for about two months now and i absolutely love love love it! i havent had any weird meat cravings or anything so yea im pretty happy :]] but anywho.. the only thing i HATE is eating at other peoples houses who arent vegetarians! it is sooo awkward! i just need some advice on how to ease the tension a little. thank youu! :]]

-Aziah!-
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#2 Old 01-20-2009, 07:46 PM
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];2199697]Eh.. so i have been a vegetarian for about two months now and i absolutely love love love it! i havent had any weird meat cravings or anything so yea im pretty happy :]] but anywho.. the only thing i HATE is eating at other peoples houses who arent vegetarians! it is sooo awkward! i just need some advice on how to ease the tension a little. thank youu! :]]

-Aziah!-



Do you mean eating at friends' houses? If so, they should respect your moral decisions and refrain from eating things that make you uncomfortable. Make sure they know how you feel. If they don't respect that there's a problem.



I used to go to a friend's house a lot when I was in primary school and she always had veggie burgers in for when I went round, or we'd have something simple and safe like pasta or chips. She was only too happy to eat veggie food while I was around; it was no detriment to her. Hopefully it'll work out this easily for you!
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#3 Old 01-20-2009, 11:07 PM
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Do you mean eating at friends' houses? If so, they should respect your moral decisions and refrain from eating things that make you uncomfortable. Make sure they know how you feel. If they don't respect that there's a problem.



I used to go to a friend's house a lot when I was in primary school and she always had veggie burgers in for when I went round, or we'd have something simple and safe like pasta or chips. She was only too happy to eat veggie food while I was around; it was no detriment to her. Hopefully it'll work out this easily for you!



I half-agree. I think you should definitely tell people that you are a vegetarian (and if there is doubt, what exactly that means). I don't think you can expect them to necessarily eat according to your beliefs, but with forewarning, a hospitable and polite host will at least make sure you have enough to eat.



It is definitely not in your best interest to keep your vegetarianism a secret. I've found that most people want to please their guests and will be accommodating.
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#4 Old 01-20-2009, 11:33 PM
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Do you mean it's awkward because there isn't food for you, or because they eat meat around you?

It's polite for you to tell them beforehand they you're vegetarian, like at least a day in advance so that they can plan what to make for you. If it's an impromptu visit then it's best not to stay for dinner unless it's takeout or something where you can order vegetarian things.

If you don't like the meat around you, oh my gosh it's gross isn't it maybe stare at some vegetables or something? lol.
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#5 Old 01-21-2009, 06:18 AM
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I half-agree. I think you should definitely tell people that you are a vegetarian (and if there is doubt, what exactly that means). I don't think you can expect them to necessarily eat according to your beliefs, but with forewarning, a hospitable and polite host will at least make sure you have enough to eat.



I wouldn't be at all comfortable eating with others who were eating meat. The sight and the smell of it would really put me off my food.



Everybody's different though, it depends on how strongly you feel about being in a situation were there is meat around. Some people can overlook it or ignore it, some people can't.



I wasn't entirely sure whether the original poster's problem was lack of appropriate food or discomfort at being around meat. If it was the latter, the solution would be to only eat with others who were also eating vegetarian, or to not eat with omnivores at all.
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#6 Old 01-21-2009, 06:24 AM
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I generally bring a "back up" with me just in case - a lentil patty in a zip-lock bag. That way I can just produce it if needed, and if not, it's all OK
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#7 Old 01-21-2009, 07:23 AM
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Tell your friends/their families about your diet before you come over. Explain what you can and can't eat, and most importantly, offer to help make food that you can eat, or offer to bring along a side dish or something that you know is safe. This way, you don't appear to be too demanding and are willing to help make their lives a little easier. It will be awkward but it's better than the alternative.



Also, don't get into arguments over meat eating and the like if they're that kind of type that would do such a thing. Be polite about it when they ask you why you gave up meat, whether it's for health or ethical reasons. People seem to understand more when you give it up for health reasons. Be prepared for the silly questions about getting iron and protein. It comes in handy to research this first so you have a couple of premade answers to common questions.



If all else fails, throw a Clif bar in your purse and eat it later.

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#8 Old 01-21-2009, 09:49 AM
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Originally Posted by WildHearted View Post

I wouldn't be at all comfortable eating with others who were eating meat. The sight and the smell of it would really put me off my food.



Maybe, and although the smell and sight of meat makes me feel a bit ill too, you can't expect them to eat all vegetarian food just because there's a vegetarian in their house. It's their house, and by providing vegetarian food for you they're accommodating to your dietry habits, you can't make them change theirs.





---



All of my friends know that I'm a vegetarian, so this really hasn't been a problem for me. When one of my friends had a birthday party for about 10 of us, two of us were vegetarians and she provided a LOT of vegetarian food. My best friend is a vegetarian also so that's helpful. If I'm eating at someone's house who doesn't have purposely veggie food, there's still lots we can eat, although some of it may not be entirely healthy. Chips (fries), pizza, pasta, noodles, toast, (beans on toast too), a sandwich, etc.
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#9 Old 01-21-2009, 06:15 PM
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hey sorry i should have been more specific.. i just meant that its awkward when they cook something special just for me.. im thankful and everything its just a tad embarrassing.. especially because i dont think that a lot of my friends know exactly what is allowed and what isn't. like fixing me a plate of vegetables that has been cooking in a pot with nasty meat for two hours. ewwy. i dont mind watching other people eat meat, my parents arent vegetarians so im totally used to it by now, although it is soo so disgusting i must admit lol. but there just seems to be an awkward energy whenever i'm at a table with meat eaters.. like they're staring at me and im trying my hardest not to stare at their plates and gag lol. i know all of my friends totally support me in my decisions, but the whole situation can be a little odd at times. haa sorry for writing a novel :]]
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#10 Old 01-21-2009, 07:32 PM
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I can definitely relate to feeling awkward when people feel obligated to feed you and offer a bunch of non vegan food because veganism or in your case vegetarianism is foreign to them. I feel awful turning people's food down, I feeling like I'm offending the host.



But I do have to say, I really can't relate to being so repulsed by one's non veg*an meal that it's difficult for me to watch them eat. The only thing that really bothers me is the smell of melted cheese, and even that doesn't bother me enough to not enjoy the time spent sitting down to eat with my friends/family. Perhaps you guys were raised vegetarian so you're not as comfortable with the idea of eating meat. I know that before I went vegan if I had a veg*an friend and they refused to be around me when I ate meat I would be offended/ turned off from veg*anism.
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#11 Old 01-21-2009, 08:14 PM
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I've found the best way to deal with people making a special effort for you is to be really polite and make it clear that you appreciate their effort. That way they'll feel good about having succeeded in feeding you.

If they don't get it quite right, still be polite and thank them for their effort. Explain why you won't eat the food, "it contains gelatin, which is not suitable for vegetarians." or "it was cooked with meat, and I choose to not eat food that has had contact with meat." And then be really happy to eat something really simple like toast, so they don't feel bad about it. If you act like toast is the best thing ever, they should feel better about you ending up with that.

Being enthusiastic about toast also works if it was too short notice, or similar situations. Never want your host to feel bad. =D
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#12 Old 01-21-2009, 08:58 PM
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I've found the best way to deal with people making a special effort for you is to be really polite and make it clear that you appreciate their effort. That way they'll feel good about having succeeded in feeding you.

If they don't get it quite right, still be polite and thank them for their effort. Explain why you won't eat the food, "it contains gelatin, which is not suitable for vegetarians." or "it was cooked with meat, and I choose to not eat food that has had contact with meat." And then be really happy to eat something really simple like toast, so they don't feel bad about it. If you act like toast is the best thing ever, they should feel better about you ending up with that.

Being enthusiastic about toast also works if it was too short notice, or similar situations. Never want your host to feel bad. =D



I agree this is the best way to handle it. When offered anything vegan I am extremely thankful to who ever is providing the food. Unfortunately, I still think that it is inevitable for them to feel bummed out that you refuse to eat their cooking.
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#13 Old 01-22-2009, 04:17 PM
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Eating at other people's houses is so much harder when you're vegan. When I was vegetarian it was easy, but now I always feel so awkward. Especially when my friends' parents feel really bad if there's nothing I can eat. But usually I don't stay for dinner or I eat before I go over so I'm not hungry. Most of them never know what I don't eat, so they'll end up ordering pizza I know it's not their fault of course, but it just makes me feel worse. And it is embarrassing when they make something special just for you.



One of my friend's (we don't really hang out anymore though) parents were always so nice about it. She would always invite me over for barbecues and parties, and her parents would buy veggie burgers for me. With them it wasn't awkward at all, and they didn't act like it was weird like most people do. And they would eat the veggie burgers too, so I didn't feel like the "special" one
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#14 Old 01-23-2009, 03:26 PM
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I don't really have a problem with this, and when I did, it was only once. Though, I can't blame the mother, she's sweet.



She only speaks Spanish, (So my friend/her daughter was translating.) we were on teh topic of eating lunch, and I was like, "Okay, I don't mind eating something simple... honest." she smiled, and went to ask her mother what I could eat. The first thing her mother offers (after being informed of my vegetarianism) is Turkey, her daughter laughs, and corrects her politely. It went on for awhile until her dad got tired of it, and gave us $5 to go to the store and buy bread for PB&J! Haha.



Just had to share, but there should always be something simple you can suggest, just in case :]]
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#15 Old 01-23-2009, 04:16 PM
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yeah being vegan is hard at peoples houses.



my most embarrassing situation was when we visited a large fire station to practice using breathing apparatus in their smoke house (we dont have one). They had made loads of sandwiches, but they were cheese, egg mayo, tuna mayo, ham.



As a vegan I obviously dont eat any of them but was happy to eat nothing as we were leaving at three and I could have some toast when I got back to school.



There was a huge fuss when they found out why I wasnt eating anything, and one of the firefighters went on a ten minute mission to find vegan food in the firestation. He came back with a vegan meal of....*drumroll*.... two apples and an orange!!



I was gratefull but I really hate the huge fuss! And everyone was p****** themselves laughing and joke about it still!
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