question about breast feeding? - VeggieBoards
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#1 Old 06-08-2004, 08:03 PM
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So, I don't have kids, but I would love to have them someday... just a little too young and poor now for it!



Anyway I have an aunt that has twins, they are about 20 months old, and she still breast feeds them. I really couldn't care less, but my mom seems a bit offended by it. It seems like a lot of ppl here breast feed their kids for quite sometime as well. I know this aunt of mine actually breast fed her first kid for... I think 4 or 5 years... which that may be a bit odd... But with these kids it doesnt look so strange cause they were preemies, and they are still small.



Well I was just wondering... do ppl give you funny looks when they find out you breast feed past 6 months (my mom says you should stop when the kid doubles their weight) And how do you answer these people, I kinda just want to stick up for my aunt a bit. And I'm actually quite curious. Thanks a lot.
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#2 Old 06-08-2004, 10:07 PM
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I nursed my son until he was 14 months old. Although at that point he was only nursing at home. I don't remember anyone giving me much grief at any time during that 14 months. Occasionally a stranger would give me a weird look, but people do that anyway

The benefits of extended breastfeeding are incredible. Check out www.lalecheleage.org or www.mothering.com for more info. Maybe you can find some info on there to show your mom.

Breastfeeding was a wonderful experience for me and I wouldn't trade those precious moments for anything in the whole world.
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#3 Old 06-09-2004, 07:51 AM
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I agree with everything Sally said. I breastfed my son until he was around 2yrs old. I wouldn't have changed a thing!
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#4 Old 06-09-2004, 01:26 PM
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A friend of mine is still breastfeeding her son and he his 2 and 1/2 years old.



Another friend breastfed her daughter until she was around 5 years old. (I don't think she nursed daily at that age but it was more of a comfort thing..)



I am not sure of what generation your mom is.. My mom is in her mid-50's and breast feeding is very taboo to her... I believe a lot of people in her age group were taught that formula and bottles were best.



I have another friend who is my mothers age that came to a homeschool function I was having and one of the mothers began nursing her child during the meeting. This friend was VERY VERY offended by it.



But I don't think 20 months is to old to breast feed...
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#5 Old 06-09-2004, 02:21 PM
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Ok, so what if you have a kid and then 18 months later (or sooner) have another kid... would you stop breast feeding the older one and only breast feed the younger one?
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#6 Old 06-09-2004, 02:24 PM
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I breastfed my first for 15 months and my second for 13 months. I have a friend with a 4.5 year old and they still nurse. At that age it is more about comfort...like sucking your thumb or rubbing a favorite blanket. I know quite a few people who nursed until about age 2. It varies by the needs of the child and the comfort level of the parent.



There are many cultures where extended breastfeeding is the norm. The problem in our culture is how sexualized the breast has become. Does your aunt stick up for herself when this topic comes up? As long as it's a mutual, loving experience that provides comfort for both (in this case, all three!) parties then I don't see the problem.
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#7 Old 06-09-2004, 02:54 PM
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Well, the problem is people dont tend to say this stuff to my aunts face. She lives on the other side of the country, so we only see her once a year at best. There is a lot of "talking behind the back" in my fam But I love my aunt, she is really great, I just want to stand up for her... but I know nothing about raising kids or breast feeding...
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#8 Old 06-09-2004, 04:14 PM
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Most doctors recommend breastfeeding for at least a year. I haven't heard of the 6 month thing. My daughter will be a year old in two weeks and I am still breastfeeding. I plan on another 6 months at least. I haven't gotten any funny looks. I think it's great when people are comfortable breastfeeding, and I don't see why some people get so uptight about it. It's not like we're going around beating our kids. It's a good thing!
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#9 Old 06-09-2004, 04:28 PM
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I breastfed for 2 1/2 yrs. At the end it was just before bed. There are extreme cases i've heard of like, eight year olds breastfeeding, and that doesn't seem right to me. But a toddler seems reasonable.

http://megatarian.blogspot.com
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#10 Old 06-09-2004, 08:21 PM
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My mom (who's 70) said the 6 month thing came about because of teeth. Back in her day, a lot of kids started getting those teeth around that mark and no one wanted to get bitten!
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#11 Old 06-09-2004, 10:43 PM
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A friend's sister breast fed her kids until they were 4 or 5. They'd just come up, lift up her shirt and have a drink. When the kid is old enough for self-serve I think it's not quite right, but that's just my opinion.



Personally, I can't imagine doing it after they have a mouthful of teeth.
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#12 Old 06-09-2004, 11:03 PM
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I was breast fed until my third birthday. I could read by then. I'd say 2 is about as old as you wanna go.
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#13 Old 06-10-2004, 10:53 AM
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Em's got 4 teeth, and I've never been bitten (yet).
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#14 Old 06-10-2004, 01:48 PM
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Breastfed all three of mine -- weaned the first at 11 months, reluctantly. My husband and I had made plans to go on a vacation and leave Peter (who absolutely refused to take a bottle) with Mark's parents. He went straight to one of those sipper-cups. Funny how your feelings change. Looking back I can't believe I did that just to go on a trip...



Anna didn't wean until over 2-1/2. Although I felt fine nursing her at that age, in retrospect I think I had gotten into a bad habit of nursing her on many occasions as a sort of human pacifier, while I was being too lazy to give her other attention, like playtime. She'd toddle over to me when I really wanted to watch the rest of a TV show or talk on the phone and rather than stop what I was doing, I'd just offer her the breast, knowing it would quiet her demands. The only bad part about frequently nursing a toddler this way can sometimes be that they get very demanding -- insisting on "nurnee, NURNEE" in situations where it would be difficult. By the way, she certainly had teeth and this wasn't any problem whatsoever.



By the time I got to my third and last child, I breastfed until my son was about 18 months and this was "just right" for both of us. The weaning was basically "child led", but unlike with Anna, when Thomas wanted attention I didn't assume he had to be nursed and spent more time playing with him, etc.



Anyway, I did want to say that there really is a wonderful & uniquely special closeness about nursing past young babyhood. Contact your local La Leche League for more information and support. They're a great resource.
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#15 Old 06-10-2004, 02:45 PM
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Yep, both of mine had a full set of teeth before we weaned and it wasn't too much of a problem. They learned quickly that biting ended the current nursing session.
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#16 Old 06-10-2004, 11:35 PM
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OK, after I just said today that she hasn't bitten me...she bites me. Not 20 minutes later. Ouch!
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#17 Old 06-20-2004, 05:03 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Wolfie View Post

A friend's sister breast fed her kids until they were 4 or 5. They'd just come up, lift up her shirt and have a drink. When the kid is old enough for self-serve I think it's not quite right, but that's just my opinion.



Personally, I can't imagine doing it after they have a mouthful of teeth.

Yeah, I personally think if the kid can walk up to your boob, that's too old. No offense to anyone, but that's kinda gross. Especially breastfeeding till the kid is 5, why??
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#18 Old 06-20-2004, 07:03 PM
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I breastfed my daughter until she was 3 years 8 months. My son is almost 3 and still breastfeeding.



Before my first child was born, I saw a video about raising vegetarian children. On the video you saw older kids walking up to their mothers and nurse. My husband and I found that so weird.

I expected to wean my kid at about 1 year of age.

She was born and we started nursing. She really wanted and needed it everyday and time just kept going. She was one and very clearly not ready to stop and I didn't even consider it. She kept getting older and older, but nursing was just a really important part of her life. It was just out of the question for me to wean her. One day, she was just done.

I am taking the same route with my son.



I think that it is completely normal for people in our current society to think that it's weird to nurse older kids. I felt the same way before I became one of those mothers. I am not offended at all. For me it was just something that naturally happened when my children just needed it so badly. Nursing can be so extremely comforting for them. It's their little safe place. Closeness with their mother.



Well, that's my story.

I would say: defend your aunt! I have had people (family) attack me about the nursing. But all it is, is a mother listening to the needs of her child.
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#19 Old 06-21-2004, 01:31 PM
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It's different for everyone...



My son I nursed for 13 months, right through the second trimester of my next pregnancy ( they are 18 mons apart)! I was so sick with the pregnancy (puking ) that I just eased off and he eventually gave up on it. With my daughter I had to stop at 13 months because I needed major abdominal surgery (Gigantic hernia due to being a tiny woman and having 10lb babies). She wasn't at all upset about it, she was drinking extremely well from a cup around 7 1/2 months anyway. They don't suck their thumbs, they never had pacifiers, and they never drank from a bottle. I sucked my thumb until I was 17! haha



I think if you can at least do it the first 6 weeks of their lives you're doing great. It's not for everyone it seems, but it's a gift we are so blessed with, to provide for our precious babies something only we can give them. I think you should be able to do it as long as you both still want to. I probably would have continued until they were coming up to me and asking for it! It was a wonderful time in my life when I really felt beautiful and natural...



Peace and Love,

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#20 Old 07-14-2004, 11:11 AM
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Even the AAP (which tends to be quite conservative) reccomends bf'ing for a MINIMUM of 2 yrs.



The importance of breastfeeding is topped by NOTHING. People have their own "old school" hang ups in this country. But the fact remains that we can prevent disease and provide outstanding health benefits (not to mention emotional benefits) by bf'ing our babies for as long as they need to. A baby will stop when he's done.



end rant...

Kimberley (and her 16month nursling Baylor)
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#21 Old 07-14-2004, 11:13 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by citronella49 View Post

Ok, so what if you have a kid and then 18 months later (or sooner) have another kid... would you stop breast feeding the older one and only breast feed the younger one?



Many people will continue to nurse their older baby as well. Sometimes pregnancy can affect one's supply and tenderness... but it isn't usually a problem.

Kimberley
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#22 Old 07-14-2004, 11:17 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Wolfie View Post

A friend's sister breast fed her kids until they were 4 or 5. They'd just come up, lift up her shirt and have a drink. When the kid is old enough for self-serve I think it's not quite right, but that's just my opinion.



Personally, I can't imagine doing it after they have a mouthful of teeth.



Hi there,

My 16 month old basically has all his teeth. He also can walk right up to me if I'm sitting and lift my shirt and nurse as he wishes. I'm okay with this. He's okay with this and my husband is okay with this. He's a preemie. He hasn't had more than a stuffy nose his entire life. He has met all his motor/speech, etc. goals ahead of schedule. Breastfeeding is a great contributer to his personal success. SO, should anyone have a problem with his breastfeeding?

Kimberley
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#23 Old 07-14-2004, 12:08 PM
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I don't think there's any set rule for when to stop. I think most people would generally agree that at least a year is good, more if you can do it. Depends on the child. I've heard that when you stop, the kid is imediately more independent and self sufficient, if that helps.



I think that when they start walking/talking or really getting around on their own, they should be 'off the teet" so to speak. Having a 4 year old walk up to you, pull up your shirt and start to breastfeed is just plain freaky. What's different from that and a 10 year old breastfeeding? Too wierd for my blood.



(this is coming from one who has no kids, but desperately wants one.)
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#24 Old 07-15-2004, 03:47 PM
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There is something about a child being able to ask for the teet that bothers me, as well. My previous job had a person who breastfed their child until grade 2 (they were in another office). Only met them once, but they were...different for sure. I seriously hope that the child is not typical of late breastfed kids.



As it is, if I ever have children, I highly doubt I will breastfed for personal reasons.
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#25 Old 07-16-2004, 10:53 AM
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Well obviously breastmilk is the most natural and healthy thing for any baby mammal to drink until they are able to survive on solid foods. I personally wouldn't put atificial crap into my own body, so I most definitely wouldn't put it into my child's little body.

I had to go through a LOT of difficulties and pain to be able to breastfeed my daughter, but I think that made me appreciate it so much more. The bond that you experience from nursing your child is like no other. I ended up breastfeeding her for 17 months and my son for 12 months. They both pretty much weaned on their own, I was suprised at how early my son weaned but he truly did not want to nurse anymore and since he was eating solid foods, I didn't press the issue.

I don't have a problem with mothers nursing older toddlers, every child has different needs and maybe some kids need the emotional comfort that comes from nursing longer than others. Our society is so sick, we have taken a natural, functional body part like the breasts and sexualized them so that nursing your own child can be something controversial! That is just crazy to me!



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#26 Old 07-17-2004, 04:26 PM
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I don't have any kids, but I was breastfed until I was 12 months old, and then was weened only because my mom had to go back to work. I was ahead of schedule for stuff like walking, talking, and reading. People give the wierdest looks when they hear this. I don't understand it at all. Twelve months is still a lot less than recommended! People saying rude things to breastfeeding mothers need to shut up and get themselves some education on the issue.
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#27 Old 07-17-2004, 04:46 PM
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I think its great that women are breastfeeding longer. I breastfed my daughter till 9 months exclusively when she(already active and starting to walk) started striking and pushing me away. I gave bottles because she just wouldn't stop crying and eventually lost my supply. I wish I had started pumping when she was striking so atleast I could have kept up enough of a supply.



I took fenugreek herbs and pumped as much as I could and never got even an ounce so it was pretty much gone by then. I had a goal of a year and that I would let her self wean as long as it was by 3 years old.
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#28 Old 07-17-2004, 04:58 PM
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Originally Posted by ImarriedET View Post

A friend of mine is still breastfeeding her son and he his 2 and 1/2 years old.



Another friend breastfed her daughter until she was around 5 years old. (I don't think she nursed daily at that age but it was more of a comfort thing..)



I am not sure of what generation your mom is.. My mom is in her mid-50's and breast feeding is very taboo to her... I believe a lot of people in her age group were taught that formula and bottles were best.



I have another friend who is my mothers age that came to a homeschool function I was having and one of the mothers began nursing her child during the meeting. This friend was VERY VERY offended by it.



But I don't think 20 months is to old to breast feed...



I have to agree with the Mid-50's thing my mother in law is mid 50's and believe in bottles and formula(well actually whole milk, she had my husband on whole milk by 2 months old) but my mom who is younger(had me at 23 and my brothers and was done by 25) in 40's and totally believes in breastfeeding. My grandmother tried but was unable to probably from lack of support back then. But she also believe breastfeeding is best.



So I definetely think that different generations were taught different stuff.



Whats funny is both of MIL's sisters breastfed their children one is older and in 60's and other is younger in 40's. I think something happened in the 50 year olds life.



Right now I know the world Health orgnanization recommends 2 years for optimal health but to atleast do 1 year is possible.



I just also wanted to say that while I knew i would breastfeed since I was young 18 or so I also thought it was odd to feed a toddler who could walk up and lift shirt to eat. But when you think of other animals that nurse their young they walk right up and nurse so whats so odd about it other than public issues of nudity. Its just that humans take longer to learn to walk.
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#29 Old 07-17-2004, 05:07 PM
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bluegrrl,



If God/mother nature what ever your beliefs are had not intended for children to be nursed that long then I would think that women wouldn't prodce milk past when they should nurse. Its my opinion but I too had same thougts as you before I had my first child.
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#30 Old 07-17-2004, 05:59 PM
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But when you think of other animals that nurse their young they walk right up and nurse

Elephants nurse until theirs babies are 4.
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