My daughter gets it! - VeggieBoards
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#1 Old 02-24-2010, 10:52 PM
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So, I haven't been on here in a little over a week, my husband came back from his work trip and I've been insanely busy with school...anyway, just wanted to pop in and say that my daughter finally gets it!



I originally came on here looking for ways to help my 3 year old understand why we don't eat meat..well I took some of you guys' advice and I talked to her about it very gently, that we don't eat animals because we love them and that in order for them to become food they have to die first.



So, a week went by with her eating no meat. My husband came home and the next night we went out to Chili's because we were out late looking for fencing materials. Her & I both ordered vegetarian meals, but my husband (who is omni) ordered a full slab of ribs (ugh.) When the food came, my daughter almost started crying (I felt sad for her but so very happy that she finally got it) telling her dad that he shouldn't eat cows (I reminded her that it was pig) and she said "Daddy, don't eat cows or pigs...they are our friends."



So, it was sad but so wonderful. My daughter finally gets it. So, until she starts school this fall we should be battle free on the issue. This won't be easy when she starts schools in the fall, since all meals have meat..I'll have to find a way to convince them to make meatless meals, or figure out how to pack peanut-free meals.
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#2 Old 02-25-2010, 06:51 AM
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Originally Posted by OkiBanana View Post

So, I haven't been on here in a little over a week, my husband came back from his work trip and I've been insanely busy with school...anyway, just wanted to pop in and say that my daughter finally gets it!



I originally came on here looking for ways to help my 3 year old understand why we don't eat meat..well I took some of you guys' advice and I talked to her about it very gently, that we don't eat animals because we love them and that in order for them to become food they have to die first.



So, a week went by with her eating no meat. My husband came home and the next night we went out to Chili's because we were out late looking for fencing materials. Her & I both ordered vegetarian meals, but my husband (who is omni) ordered a full slab of ribs (ugh.) When the food came, my daughter almost started crying (I felt sad for her but so very happy that she finally got it) telling her dad that he shouldn't eat cows (I reminded her that it was pig) and she said "Daddy, don't eat cows or pigs...they are our friends."



So, it was sad but so wonderful. My daughter finally gets it. So, until she starts school this fall we should be battle free on the issue. This won't be easy when she starts schools in the fall, since all meals have meat..I'll have to find a way to convince them to make meatless meals, or figure out how to pack peanut-free meals.



Good to hear! Sorry she cried in Chili's (although it's kind of sweet to picture a little girl tearfully informing her father that "pigs are friends" while staring at his gross babyback ribs). Can you call her future school to see if they offer vegetarian options? Many schools already have vegetarian alternatives, even if they're not advertised. If they don't currently offer vegetarian food for children, you have enough time to politely suggest they update their menus to be more inclusive to vegetarians.



Will your daughter be attending public school? If so, you could frame her vegetarian meal requests as part of accomodating your family's "belief system." I'm not suggesting you lie and say you're a specific religion if you're not, but if the school interprets your statement as a reasonable spiritual/religious request, they might be more apt to honor it...
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#3 Old 02-25-2010, 06:59 AM
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Aww, that was cute and broke my heart all at the same time.....



How'd dad take that scene?
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#4 Old 02-25-2010, 07:21 AM
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Aww, that was cute and broke my heart all at the same time.....



How'd dad take that scene?



I can only imagine frustration & embarrassment on his part.. most omnis HATE when you mention anything about the dead animal they're about to eat, even more so when in public.. =/

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#5 Old 02-25-2010, 12:17 PM
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Aww...sad and sweet at the same time. I can just imagine a little girl doing a commercial on vegetarianism asking people to not eat animals because they are our friends.
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#6 Old 02-25-2010, 10:51 PM
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He looked a little upset that it upset her, but he continued to eat the entire thing right in front of her. He's an omni, and as hard as I try..I'm not sure if I can change that. But when he eats things like ribs, which are very obvious to our child that it came from an animal - well it's just a little sad.



About the school, I can try..but she'll be attending a Dodds (Department of Defense - military) school, and we don't have any other options for schools as we're overseas, and she can't go to school off base since she isn't fluent in Japanese. I'll start asking questions when I go to enroll her in April. Hopefully it isn't a big deal.
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#7 Old 03-26-2010, 12:43 PM
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Wow good job!











At brainwashing your kid. It would be a different thing if she was a bit older (like 12 at least sheesh) but you had her make a life changing decision at 3? She probably doesn't even understand what shes doing. I mean what kid at that age (or any age...but I hope you get what I'm saying) would wanna hear about animals dying?
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#8 Old 03-26-2010, 12:44 PM
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Wow good job!











At brainwashing your kid. It would be a different thing if she was a bit older (like 12 at least sheesh) but you had her make a life changing decision at 3? She probably doesn't even understand what shes doing. I mean what kid at that age (or any age...but I hope you get what I'm saying) would wanna hear about animals dying?
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#9 Old 03-26-2010, 02:20 PM
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Wow good job!











At brainwashing your kid. It would be a different thing if she was a bit older (like 12 at least sheesh) but you had her make a life changing decision at 3? She probably doesn't even understand what shes doing. I mean what kid at that age (or any age...but I hope you get what I'm saying) would wanna hear about animals dying?

You know that is exactly when a child at 3 comes to know Christ or a Faith or something. Just because a child is that young that don't mean they don't understand where it comes from. If she speaks and understand foods and stuff they understand where it comes from. My niece was little younger then her when she was cussing. Which I am not comparing just saying each child is different.



Anyhow glad your little one knows that the meat comes from innocent animals that is killed for recoration and enjoyment
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#10 Old 03-26-2010, 05:39 PM
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i think its unfortunate that it wasn't discussed with that dads input, and that that the whole restaurant thing happened- cos its gotta feel like guilttripping/blackmail/emotional warfare to him, and it'd be confusing and obviously was very distressing to the kid.
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#11 Old 03-26-2010, 07:11 PM
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You know that is exactly when a child at 3 comes to know Christ or a Faith or something. Just because a child is that young that don't mean they don't understand where it comes from. If she speaks and understand foods and stuff they understand where it comes from. My niece was little younger then her when she was cussing. Which I am not comparing just saying each child is different.



Ugh those people are just as bad...children will absorb anything (especially at that age) they are told by their parents. Although a bit more extreme of an example look at those Westboro people. They jam that that "God hates X person" garbage down there kids throat and the kids do nothing but run around spewing their parents hate all over the place.



And yeah thats total crap that decided to spring this on your daughter while the father was away and then wait to let him know while you were in public.



And you better not let your kid go into the wild because she might see nature in action
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#12 Old 03-26-2010, 07:29 PM
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I'm glad she got it. When I was around four or five, I asked my parents where steak and such comes from and when they told me I freaked out. I told them I didn't want to eat animals, but they made me do it anyway, thinking that it was the right and healthy thing to do. My step dad used to make me drink milk with every meal, and thought I was lying when I said that it made me sick. Turns out I'm lactose intolerant. Anyway, I think the way you handled it was completely appropriate and if Dad doesn't like it or feels guilty, maybe that should tell him something.
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#13 Old 03-26-2010, 09:18 PM
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Originally Posted by OkiBanana View Post

I talked to her about it very gently, that we don't eat animals because we love them and that in order for them to become food they have to die first.



I see nothing wrong with this. In fact I think it's wrong that parents hide that animals have to die for food. Lots of farm kids know that - but they don't have the attendant value of not eating them because their families don't love animals. And if you kill them when you don't need to for a taste preference, that's just not love.



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At brainwashing your kid.



Are you a vegetarian?



What values do you have that you might want to share with kids? Are there any? Is it o.k. to hit others when you get frustrated?

"If you want to know where you would have stood on slavery before the civil war, don't look at where you stand on slavery today, look at where you stand on animal rights." - Paul Watson.

 

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#14 Old 03-26-2010, 09:58 PM
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I see nothing wrong with this. In fact I think it's wrong that parents hide that animals have to die for food. Lots of farm kids know that - but they don't have the attendant value of not eating them because their families don't love animals. And if you kill them when you don't need to for a taste preference, that's just not love.

Just because you eat animals doesn't mean you don't love them. It means you're hungry and a normal member of nature.



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Are you a vegetarian?



What values do you have that you might want to share with kids? Are there any? Is it o.k. to hit others when you get frustrated?

No. And I think aside from basic social norms I don't think views should be imposed upon kids because all the creates is generations of ignorance.
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#15 Old 03-28-2010, 09:15 PM
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how old is your daughter ?If she isn't over 22 ,there's good for her to be a vegan .
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#16 Old 03-28-2010, 09:48 PM
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Farm kids love animals, they just generally also accept it as a fact of life. However, that's not true for all of us. I'm hurt, Irizary. Even the not-veg*n farm kids generally like or love animals, even if they don't share our morals.



Vanasa, I believe OP said she was three.
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#17 Old 03-28-2010, 09:55 PM
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Farm kids love animals, they just generally also accept it as a fact of life. However, that's not true for all of us. I'm hurt, Irizary. Even the not-veg*n farm kids generally like or love animals, even if they don't share our morals.



Sorry you're hurt, but you don't kill someone for taste or for profit whom you claim to love. Or I hope I never experience your idea of "love."



I mean, plenty of dads who rape their kids claim to love them too, but that love is crap and I woudn't call it love.

"If you want to know where you would have stood on slavery before the civil war, don't look at where you stand on slavery today, look at where you stand on animal rights." - Paul Watson.

 

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#18 Old 03-29-2010, 04:28 PM
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Originally Posted by OkiBanana View Post

He looked a little upset that it upset her, but he continued to eat the entire thing right in front of her. He's an omni, and as hard as I try..I'm not sure if I can change that. But when he eats things like ribs, which are very obvious to our child that it came from an animal - well it's just a little sad.



About the school, I can try..but she'll be attending a Dodds (Department of Defense - military) school, and we don't have any other options for schools as we're overseas, and she can't go to school off base since she isn't fluent in Japanese. I'll start asking questions when I go to enroll her in April. Hopefully it isn't a big deal.



I grew up in an all vegetarian house, my parents told me the facts, and at a very young age I did my own research and I agreed. I have chosen to stay vegetarian for the rest of my life. It was easy for me being in an all vegetarian house, but I know how complicated it can be when your spouse is a meat eater. My little sister is being raised by my veg mom and my meat eating step father. I think at 3 she is way too young and impressionable to be able to make a decision like becoming a vegetarian or not, on her own. She will just end up being whatever side pushes her to their habits the most until she is old enough to decide for herself. Be careful she doesnt become disrespectful of others beliefs, view points, whatever you want to call it. You cant expect someone to respect your eating decisions if you arent respecting theirs. When shes older and eating with her classmates at school, if she has the idea that everyone that eats meat is a villain then there is going to be some major issues.



My elementary school said they would make me a veggie burger on burger day if I supplied them. When I did they looked at me like I was crazy, so I stopped bothering having them make me veg versions and had a packed lunch on days there wasnt a veg option. By the time I got to high school veggie burgers were already on the menu.



Does your husband try to get you to eat meat?







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Originally Posted by hoodedclawjen View Post

i think its unfortunate that it wasn't discussed with that dads input, and that that the whole restaurant thing happened- cos its gotta feel like guilttripping/blackmail/emotional warfare to him, and it'd be confusing and obviously was very distressing to the kid.



I agree, anything like this should be discussed with both parents. You dont want the kid to feel like a soldier in your vegetarian vs omnivore war.



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Originally Posted by Irizary View Post

I see nothing wrong with this. In fact I think it's wrong that parents hide that animals have to die for food. Lots of farm kids know that - but they don't have the attendant value of not eating them because their families don't love animals. And if you kill them when you don't need to for a taste preference, that's just not love.







Are you a vegetarian?



What values do you have that you might want to share with kids? Are there any? Is it o.k. to hit others when you get frustrated?





I agree with the first half of your post. Stunting your childs knowledge so they easily conform to your beliefs is always wrong. I had quite a few parents angry at me when I was little, because I informed their kid what their meat used to be. They were so afraid that their kids may want to become vegetarian too.



I think its a stretch to say a meat eater doesn't love animals. I guess a vegetarian must hate cows and chickens. Since, they most likely still buy dairy and egg products that come from factory farms.





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Originally Posted by peacefulveglady View Post

You know that is exactly when a child at 3 comes to know Christ or a Faith or something. Just because a child is that young that don't mean they don't understand where it comes from. If she speaks and understand foods and stuff they understand where it comes from. My niece was little younger then her when she was cussing. Which I am not comparing just saying each child is different.



Anyhow glad your little one knows that the meat comes from innocent animals that is killed for recoration and enjoyment



There is "brainwashing" to an extent with all firmly held beliefs that a parent has, commonly religious based ones. If you are Christian you are going to raise your kid to be Christian. If you are Islamic you are going to raise your kid to be Islamic and so on. It can be unintentional, but its still mind control. A young child is just sponge and when you raise them to be a Christian, telling them its the truth, they are going to believe it, at least until they are old enough to evaluate the beliefs that are instilled in them. Teaching your kid not hit others is one thing but, some parents may take instilling their beliefs into their kids too far and it truly becomes brainwashing, like the Westboro family. I graduated from a Christian high school. Some of the students there chose to accept Christ others were brainwashed into it and would never question anything. Being a sheep is dangerous, thats how the Bible was falsely used to oppress many. At that school they still used it to oppress. As an example, if a girl got raped she would be kicked out for having premarital sex.
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#19 Old 03-29-2010, 06:51 PM
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I think it’s a stretch to say a meat eater doesn't love animals. I guess a vegetarian must hate cows and chickens. Since, they most likely still buy dairy and egg products that come from factory farms.



It's not hatred. It's being at least somewhat indifferent to their suffering, if there are other options available.



Quote:
It can be unintentional, but it’s still mind control. A young child is just sponge and when you raise them to be a Christian, telling them it’s the truth, they are going to believe it, at least until they are old enough to evaluate the beliefs that are instilled in them.



Sure, but the belief she's instilling is that animals have feelings and they don't like to be killed for food (which is a fact, actually). I guess the "we care about them" part is a belief system. Maybe when the child grows up she can decide she doesn't care about them, but to me that's a devolution, away from compassion.

"If you want to know where you would have stood on slavery before the civil war, don't look at where you stand on slavery today, look at where you stand on animal rights." - Paul Watson.

 

Every animal you eat
was running for her life

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