How To Flirt 101 - VeggieBoards
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#1 Old 06-17-2008, 07:45 PM
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Ummmmm so yeah. I'm dating this guy and either he really just isnt into me in that way, or he's shy. My friends are like "flirt with him a bit and see what happens" or "are you flirting with him?" and I realized.. I don't think I am. Like, I just be myself and talk and giggle and joke and all that, but I'm not all small touches batty eyelash and all that...



I just want a kiss.



How do i get the message across that if he wanted to take it to that level, i'd be more than happy, without really risking looking like a complete dolt if I'm wrong..?
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#2 Old 06-17-2008, 09:39 PM
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Say the following:



"Hello fine sir, I would be quite pleased if you would express your emotion through the physical means of our lips connecting. Thank you."
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#3 Old 06-17-2008, 09:42 PM
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Originally Posted by troub View Post

Say the following:



"Hello fine sir, I would be quite pleased if you would express your emotion through the physical means of our lips connecting. Thank you."



Jump him. Most guys will get that.
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#4 Old 06-17-2008, 09:42 PM
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Strong eye contact in a romantic setting (or at least somewhere quiet).



If he looks away ask him if he's shy or nervous.



If he's dating you, and goes out with you again, he must be interested, so I'd say just make the first move. Or just ask him if you can kiss him.
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#5 Old 06-17-2008, 10:01 PM
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all of the above would be so embarassing if he were like "um... wow... sorry but uh.. yeah.. I'm not really into you like that.." or worse yet, if he dodged when i jumped!



I'm more wondering how I can be flirty without being obvious, but enough to get the point across...
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#6 Old 06-17-2008, 10:02 PM
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Originally Posted by Earthly Delight View Post

all of the above would be so embarassing if he were like "um... wow... sorry but uh.. yeah.. I'm not really into you like that.." or worse yet, if he dodged when i jumped!



I'm more wondering how I can be flirty without being obvious, but enough to get the point across...



just watch his face and body language. that'll tell you everything you need to know.
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#7 Old 06-18-2008, 02:21 AM
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If this is the picnic guy (or even if not) - feed him blueberries?
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#8 Old 06-18-2008, 07:24 AM
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I think eye contact and his reaction to it is really important, and watch his body language as you sit closer to him or further away. If his hands are near yours or on a table brush them casually as you talk and watch his reaction and so on.



These are all things that can be done amongst friends, little touches and looks that could just as easily be casual occurrences. His reaction to them will hopefully help you know how he feels



(Note I'm a very shy person, so asking outright is never on! I'm a big believer in watching and listening closely for clues while surreptitiously making all the moves!)
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#9 Old 06-18-2008, 07:36 AM
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If you're dating him then I'd assume it's safe to say he likes you Next time you two go out on a date (which you do cause you're dating, right?) wear something pretty sexy, ask him questions and Listen with eye contact, put your hand on his leg, bite your lip, laugh and flip your hair, wear cute heels or whatever and slip your foot in and out of your shoe while you're listening to him etc etc etc.



If that stuff doesn't get you smooched.... he's pitchin for the other team Most of all Have Fun with him and be confident cause that's the sexiest thing you can do.
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#10 Old 06-18-2008, 08:04 AM
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^^^ beachbnny you make me happy.



PS I read the cutest flirt move online--instead of asking him the time, take his wrist and check it yourself. SUCH a good excuse for contact. lol....
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#11 Old 06-18-2008, 09:05 AM
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Seriously, if that's you in your avitar, you're bubbling with cuteness and you're always witty and nice- so don't stress about it. Of course, you could always cook for him too You're fantastic at that also.



Hell, I'll date you! J/J I know it can make you nervous but he probably feels the same way. Just have fun and he'll come around
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#12 Old 06-18-2008, 01:41 PM
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Stare and touch are pretty much the two flirt moves. Intense eye contact can be really awkward, but that is what makes first kisses perfect. That super awkward moment when you both totally want to but you're both scared and then finally someone leans in and does it! Find ways to get really close to him or touch him - give him a hug when you see him and stay standing close after, brush his leg with your foot if your sitting together, get an eyelash, when you laugh- reach out and touch his arm, if you walk somewhere hold his hand, or check his watch even



Some guys won't catch on to flirting ever - so at some point you may just have to go for it and risk rejection. Odds are he's nervous and will be happy you did.
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#13 Old 06-18-2008, 02:11 PM
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see if i could tell he wanted to i'd do it, that much im not scared even... he's just so shy that part of me isnt even sure he wants to, ever...



I have decided its shy because I just went on facebook and his 'status' was something along the lines of "yesterday was more fun than seeing sam roberts. and that's saying something "



(As we were heading out his coworker called and asked if he was coming in to work--he said no, it was his day off. His coworker told him Sam Roberts, his favourite artist of all time, was going to be there signing autographs--he flipped and I was like "we'll turn around." but he refused and insisted we didn't.)''



That comment made me realllllly happy. lol. Ok, so for a while he worked with a marine biologist studying fish and he really loves fish in general. I know aquariums might be considered not vegan, but I still want to take him somewhere with a really big aquarium in it--i wish there were a bar/lounge somewhere in Toronto or even southern ontario (it'd be worth the drive) that had a huuuge tropical aquarium we could have drinks by. The Rainforest Cafe in toronto apparently has amazing aquariums, but its got a lot of loud kids and yesterday there were sooo many kids with us in the park... (like we both like kids, so it was ok, but two in a row? I'm thinking a little wine will help BOTH of us loosen up, lol.)
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#14 Old 06-18-2008, 02:20 PM
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"So, what you do if I just suddenly turned around and planted a big one on ya?" "Just curious, that's all."
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#15 Old 06-18-2008, 02:24 PM
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lol froggy i'd go PURPLE with embarassment. (That's right. Pink, or even Red, are not adequate)
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#16 Old 06-18-2008, 02:36 PM
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I'd say that you're good to go from his facebook status



Have fun!!! I just started recently dating someone new myself, so I'm right there with you with those giddy/happy feelings
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#17 Old 06-18-2008, 02:54 PM
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i phoned my best friend at his work and totally went gaga on the phone with glee about the facebook thing (he stays the most up to date on my lovelife of my best friends--i think its cus he takes a bit of personal interest, but he has a gf so i dont feel bad, lol.)



starting out is the best. never again in a relationship are you so happily confused. Confused yes, but its never quite so pleasant.
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#18 Old 06-18-2008, 04:52 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by froggythefrog View Post

"So, what you do if I just suddenly turned around and planted a big one on ya?" "Just curious, that's all."



Babe, if you'd said that to me, I'd have been so speechless and embarrassed and shocked I wouldn't have answered... and you'd have probably taken that for a big "NO!" and THEN where would we be?
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#19 Old 06-18-2008, 06:16 PM
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Originally Posted by Tofu-N-Sprouts View Post

Babe, if you'd said that to me, I'd have been so speechless and embarrassed and shocked I wouldn't have answered... and you'd have probably taken that for a big "NO!" and THEN where would we be?



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#20 Old 06-18-2008, 07:03 PM
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I've found from years of experience that this line usually breaks the ice in a romantic sense:



"Did you know that a rare species of marsupials can use their noses as jet engines and fly around? I didn't know that either, because I just made it up. However, now is the time for us to mate."

"and I stand

upon a mountain

made of weak and useless men"

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#21 Old 06-18-2008, 08:58 PM
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Well, i would just be yourself, if you try to say a line or do anything that you're not comfortable with it might be awkward. Just give it some time, the more you get to know someone the easier it gets. good conversation and laughter always helps!
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#22 Old 06-18-2008, 10:05 PM
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I agree with those who said to just being yourself.



It will happen when it happens - maybe he's waiting for just the right moment, I know that I always want a first kiss to be memorable, so while I may want to kiss a person for a while, I won't do it until the time is right, Lord willing. Plus I like to go slow, drag out the beauty of the firsts, enjoy it all step by step. It's sort of like drinking wine, you don't get quite the experience if you chug it compared to going



step



by



step.





And flirting? It's all about the non-verbals. A shy smile, a poke or a tap, or even saying something in a flirty way like, "hey boy" instead of "hey roger". Non-verbals say a ton.



When I was on a walk a month ago with a girl I like she just sort of poked my palm (I was ahead of her with my hands behind me). It was flirty and fun and I loved it. In response, I turned, grabbed her sunlit hands, rocked side to side, and spun her, dancing to the swaying flowers and flowing stream. Neither action was expected.



Try asking if he's ticklish, and if he says why, just say "just wondering" with a shy smile. It hints toward more without actually fully risking embarrassment.
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#23 Old 06-22-2008, 09:30 PM
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There is definitely an art to flirting.



I think that people are giving some fantastic advice too!

Spontanaity and a sense of humor are important...



So are lingering sidelong glances with a coy smile that gets a little bigger a moment after his eyes catch yours.



Find excuses to get a little closer, and after you are close... tell him he smells really good (as long as he doesn't stink).



I also think you're right- a little wine can help~!

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May the whole world be joyous'
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#24 Old 06-22-2008, 09:37 PM
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Don't worry so much about the first kiss. It's the kisses that may follow that may be a lot more fun.



I thought my first kiss with my boyfriend would be something special and wonderful. It was horrible. It took me a couple of weeks to teach him how I wanted to be kissed. Until then, I was practically gagging.



Your first kiss with this guy may be lovely, romantic, and yes, your foot may pop... but it might not. You could do that "I go 90 percent of the way, the other person goes 10 percent" thing from the movie Hitch...

Q: How many poets does it take to change a light bulb? A: 1001...one to change the bulb, 1000 to say it's already been done.
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#25 Old 06-22-2008, 09:48 PM
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It's always amazed me how anyone hooks up with anyone with so much thought given to this subject. If I had to worry about gesticulating my body and face in just the precisely proper way I would see myself to my hole in the ground and relish solitude.
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#26 Old 06-23-2008, 02:56 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Earthly Delight View Post

all of the above would be so embarassing if he were like "um... wow... sorry but uh.. yeah.. I'm not really into you like that.." or worse yet, if he dodged when i jumped!



I'm more wondering how I can be flirty without being obvious, but enough to get the point across...



Sometimes guys are just dense. Flirting might be too subtle. You might have to actually go for it, especially if he's shy.



Quote:
Originally Posted by barefoot View Post

just watch his face and body language. that'll tell you everything you need to know.



Once again, guys can be dense. Take it from the king of denseness. I'm the guy who was too shy to ask girls out in high school. But looking back on some of the conversations with girls in school that I thought were just "weird" at the time, I realized that at least four different girls flirted with me over the years, and I was completely oblivious to it all.



Quote:
Originally Posted by Sevenseas View Post

I've found from years of experience that this line usually breaks the ice in a romantic sense:



"Did you know that a rare species of marsupials can use their noses as jet engines and fly around? I didn't know that either, because I just made it up. However, now is the time for us to mate."



Sevenseas, I knew you had to have a softer side in there somewhere.



--Fromper

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#27 Old 06-23-2008, 07:11 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Fromper View Post

Once again, guys can be dense. Take it from the king of denseness. I'm the guy who was too shy to ask girls out in high school. But looking back on some of the conversations with girls in school that I thought were just "weird" at the time, I realized that at least four different girls flirted with me over the years, and I was completely oblivious to it all.



I take it you're partially joking, but I don't think guys are dense when they miss subtle hints. I think guys generally go about things differently, which often ends in the girl and guy talking past each other.
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#28 Old 06-25-2008, 05:03 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sevenseas View Post

I've found from years of experience that this line usually breaks the ice in a romantic sense:



"Did you know that a rare species of marsupials can use their noses as jet engines and fly around? I didn't know that either, because I just made it up. However, now is the time for us to mate."



*swoons*



*fans self*



Gosh, you sure do know how to talk to a lady!
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#29 Old 06-25-2008, 06:34 PM
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while the advice can continue, I actually got my first kiss from him. It may not have been the most romantic thing in the world but it sure was the absolute cutest. We're actually dating right now and we're both really, really happy to say the least... And yeah, he's a shy guy.



That is all I'll say to avoid kissing and telling.
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#30 Old 06-26-2008, 05:58 AM
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Originally Posted by Earthly Delight View Post

while the advice can continue, I actually got my first kiss from him. It may not have been the most romantic thing in the world but it sure was the absolute cutest. We're actually dating right now and we're both really, really happy to say the least... And yeah, he's a shy guy.



That is all I'll say to avoid kissing and telling.





I've always been a shy guy going into relationships. Now that you know he is really interested however you can expect some neat (and hopefully sweet) responses.



This is an exciting time!
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