I am very sorry to hear this. I lost my father 2.5 years ago in a car accident, and it really rocked my sense of stability in the world.
Here is something that a friend of mine told me about the grieving process, that made me feel a bit better.
At first, your life is a shotglass, and your grief is a golf ball. Your life isn't even big enough to contain the huge size of your grief.
As time goes by, your glass gets a bit larger. It becomes a juice glass, and finally that ball of grief can just barely be contained. There isn't a whole lot of room for anything else yet, though.
More time goes by, and now your glass is even larger. That ball of grief is the same size, but now there's a little room around it for movement.
Yet more time goes by, and now your life is a pint glass, and the ball of grief is still there, but now there is a whole depth of your life that has filled in around it.
As time continues to pass, your life grows larger and larger. That ball of grief is always there, it is always the same size, and it never goes away. But that's okay, because you grow around it, you get used to it, and you learn to carry on with it still there.
I don't know if that will help you any...it did help me to realize that I never *would* get over this grief, that I will always carry it around with me. It let me get rid of the stress of trying to recover from it and let me just feel how I feel without trying to change it. I think I've probably reached pint glass stage now, lol. My life *has* grown. It WILL get better.
I wish you comfort and blessings. These days will be hard, but they will get easier in time.