don't be afraid to really work on yourself. contemplation and meditation, coupled with readings should really help you. you may also consider councelling.
all of this, of course, is separate from the immediate (or seemingly so) issue. communication with your dad is important, but learning bout yourself and how to go about that will come from your own work. also, working through the results of your relationship with your dad will help you. These things are rather tough, emotional, and difficult. It's the long, hard path, but it leads to the best rewards--the lasting rewards.
I also want to point out a book: Iron John by Robert Blye. It's an excellent book. after reading this, i recommend another read of THe Lord of the Rings, or a watch of all three movies. Look at how they reflect masculinity and the ideas that Blye puts forth in Iron John. While this book is made for men, i've read it and gained a lot of very useful information on it for my own life. It also helps me "see" men more clearly. Perhaps it will help you see yourself and your father more clearly.
i wish you all the best!