As some long-time members might now, I was raised by my father. He and I have been inseparable my entire life, and I would not have it any other way. We are, perhaps, codependent. But again, neither of us are complaining.
He has been having severe problems with his mother and one of his sisters, to the point where they are no longer speaking with his mother. She made up (I am not kidding, I was right there when it happened) a fight and they haven’t spoken in weeks. They used to talk EVERY morning. He is incredibly hurt and heartbroken over this, and he thinks, not without some justification, that his sister is involved in the growing rift between him and his other sister. I am quite hurt as well. His mother is like a mother to me as well, and I have never seen a fight between them not cool down and go back to normal in a few days. This has been simmering since last mother’s day (or the mother’s day before that, I forget). Naturally, it also involves some long seeded problems as well.
I just want things to go back to normal. This morning my dad and I had a huge fight because he is incredibly hurt that his mother did not call him on Easter and his sister (whom my grandmother is staying with this week) did not offer to pass over the phone when I had called. He accused me of “choosing sides” against him because I did not want to get involved in it, because I feel (felt?) that eventually this was all going to stop and be normal again soon. Anyway. After a long screaming match and the painful reminder than I am moving away for three years this July, we both felt hurt and tired and exhausted and just… hurt so badly about everything going on.
I am wondering at this point if I should call my grandmother and tell her how badly she is hurting my dad because he has NO IDEA why she is behaving this way and not talking to him, or if I should continue to do as I have done, distance myself from the entire thing.
Throughout my entire life, it has always just been my dad and I. I feel great loyalty and protection for him, and I can’t stand the way he is being treated.
― Oscar Wilde, The Picture of Dorian Gray
"You will always be fond of me. I represent to you all the sins you never had the courage to commit.”