My birthday weekend is rapidly becoming the most depressing time of my life. - VeggieBoards
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#1 Old 06-23-2013, 08:54 AM
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So Friday I turned 23, and I usually get a little depressed on my birthday because they are always awful. I think maybe not this one though! I bought myself a Nikon DS 3200 for an upcominh research trip to the Hoh rainforest, and I bought myself some new cycling shoes. My dad owed me $1600, I said hold off and try and do something for my birthday instead of paying me back. He gave me $1000 and kept the $600 for whale watching.

Well his job is not going well so he hasnt been pain for it yet, worked all day on my birthday and most of yesterday. Which is fine, that's how it has always been. So I spent my birthday sitting alone (the nonhumans even ignored me) playing spore. Saturday my legs hurt from a workout so I didn't want to walk around, which is what my dad wanted to do. Today we've been fighting all day because I want to walk around the arboretum and take pictures with my new camera but he's seemed angry with me all day because jis job is sucking.

This highlights my depression, my only friend is mu dad. Or only friend that lives close. I never do anything for my birthday, and maybe I sjou ldnt expect much... but something ever would be nice.

There wasn't even cake.

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"You will always be fond of me. I represent to you all the sins you never had the courage to commit.”
Oscar Wilde, The Picture of Dorian Gray
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#2 Old 06-23-2013, 08:56 AM
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Excuse the typos I'm on mu phone.

Quote:
"You will always be fond of me. I represent to you all the sins you never had the courage to commit.”
Oscar Wilde, The Picture of Dorian Gray
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#3 Old 06-23-2013, 09:02 AM
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Aww!!! You sound thoroughly fed up!  hug.gif

 

Your only friend close by, is your dad? Sounds like you could do with making a few more. Maybe you should find and join a camera club with your shiny new camera? For what it's worth during my childhood my dad forgot most of my birthdays! I love him, but I don't think dad's are usually that brilliant at doing special days. That's more a mum thing.. Is there anyway you can book time off over your next bday and go visit someone who might be more thoughtful? A favourite female relative or old girlfriend?


The sky is purple and things are right every day

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#4 Old 06-23-2013, 09:18 AM
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HAPPY BIRTHDAY, RIVER!!!!carrot.gifbroccoli.gifdancingbanana.gifpibo.gif


"There is more wisdom in the song of a bird, than in the speech of a philosopher...." -Oahspe
"The thing is, you cannot judge a race. Any man who judges by the group is a pea-wit. You take men one at a time." -Buster Kilrain, The Killer Angels -Michael Shaara
"Anyone who doesn't believe in miracles isn't a realist." -Billy Wilder
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#5 Old 06-23-2013, 09:26 AM
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Originally Posted by Capstan View Post

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, RIVER!!!!carrot.gifbroccoli.gifdancingbanana.gifpibo.gif

 

Yeh, that too! :D


The sky is purple and things are right every day

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#6 Old 06-23-2013, 09:47 AM
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Sometimes the birthdays of your offspring bring back memories of happier and younger days. Holding your new baby in amazement, watching her carefully hold up three fingers on her third birthday with her father still whole, her wide eyes at the shiny bike on her eighth birthday, her beautiful snarling face on her fifteenth...and you think it all slipped by so fast. So you want to do special things for your daughter turning 23, but inside you are just too sad and empty to act on it. My daughter turned 24 this year, and she was lonely on her birthday, too. I ****ed it up in my own depression.
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#7 Old 06-23-2013, 09:55 AM
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And this grin.gifdeve5e3e.jpg
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#8 Old 06-23-2013, 10:44 AM
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Originally Posted by LedBoots View Post

Sometimes the birthdays of your offspring bring back memories of happier and younger days. Holding your new baby in amazement, watching her carefully hold up three fingers on her third birthday with her father still whole, her wide eyes at the shiny bike on her eighth birthday, her beautiful snarling face on her fifteenth...and you think it all slipped by so fast. So you want to do special things for your daughter turning 23, but inside you are just too sad and empty to act on it. My daughter turned 24 this year, and she was lonely on her birthday, too. I ****ed it up in my own depression.

I think that's a perspective I really needed. There is more than one angle to this.

Quote:
"You will always be fond of me. I represent to you all the sins you never had the courage to commit.”
Oscar Wilde, The Picture of Dorian Gray
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#9 Old 06-23-2013, 11:55 AM
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And thank you all for the birthday wishes :-)

Quote:
"You will always be fond of me. I represent to you all the sins you never had the courage to commit.”
Oscar Wilde, The Picture of Dorian Gray
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#10 Old 06-23-2013, 03:35 PM
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Hey, it beats being alone on your 50th birthday, and not having a rainforest trip to look forward to!

 

Happy Birthday to you!

 

...and many more!!!!


Don't let the perfect be the enemy of the good
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#11 Old 06-23-2013, 07:05 PM
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Have you tried meeetup.com? There are a lot, including cycling, photography, and veg*an--I joined, and made new friends. I'm in a photography group, and two GLBA? type groups. Do you belong to an organized religion? I'm not trying to convert you from one to another, it's a good place to meed new people. Have you done any volunteering? If there's a "Y" in your area, you might join, and help out with kids' summer camps and things like that.

On another note, Happy Birthday, River!!


Anytime I think I'm perfect, I remember that my cousin lives on an island, and I've never walked over to visit her.
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#12 Old 06-24-2013, 09:45 AM
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I really don't like meetup, I once, a few years ago, met a person online who turned out to be a pedophile getting ready to be convicted of child pornography and "immoral communications with a minor." While I am well aware you meet these people out in the world more than online, I find the idea of "setting out to meet people" something I generally don't want to do. Plus I'm only here for two more years.
And I already do lots of volunteering. I know a lot of people, I just don't know them outside of their initial "roles".

I feel better today, and I realize it was probably immature/stupid to want just one special day when there are other things going on.

Quote:
"You will always be fond of me. I represent to you all the sins you never had the courage to commit.”
Oscar Wilde, The Picture of Dorian Gray
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#13 Old 06-24-2013, 01:33 PM
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I really don't like meetup, I once, a few years ago, met a person online who turned out to be a pedophile getting ready to be convicted of child pornography and "immoral communications with a minor." While I am well aware you meet these people out in the world more than online, I find the idea of "setting out to meet people" something I generally don't want to do. Plus I'm only here for two more years.
And I already do lots of volunteering. I know a lot of people, I just don't know them outside of their initial "roles".

I feel better today, and I realize it was probably immature/stupid to want just one special day when there are other things going on.

Sorry to hear about what happened to you on meetup. Not everyone there is like that, honest. I'm just glad he got convicted (rather then you, for killing him). I'm also glad you do a lot of volunteering. As for the people you know, get to know them outside their initial roles. Go out with them afterwards--dinner, movie, ball game, a walk, etc. Have one (or more) go with you to the Hoh Rainforest. It's also not immature or stupid to want a special day. Everyone deserves a special day to be celebrated. Hang in there, and I hope you have a good time at the rainforest.  


Anytime I think I'm perfect, I remember that my cousin lives on an island, and I've never walked over to visit her.
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#14 Old 06-24-2013, 01:42 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by River View Post

 I realize it was probably immature/stupid to want just one special day when there are other things going on.

I don't think it's immature or stupid, everyone wants to feel celebrated on their birthday. I KNOW I'm too old to make a big deal out of birthdays but I still need to have concrete plans or I feel really depressed too. If that IS immature and stupid well I'll happily join the club. It's the one day I like to know there'll be fun things to do. I blame society! I'm sorry you had a bad one this year but I promise you'll have great ones too. 

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#15 Old 06-24-2013, 01:54 PM
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I don't think it's immature or stupid, everyone wants to feel celebrated on their birthday. I KNOW I'm too old to make a big deal out of birthdays but I still need to have concrete plans or I feel really depressed too. If that IS immature and stupid well I'll happily join the club. It's the one day I like to know there'll be fun things to do. I blame society! I'm sorry you had a bad one this year but I promise you'll have great ones too. 

See, that's so it. I just wanted a plan. Neither my dad or the person I'm seeing had any plan of any kind. It seems pathetix to make my own plan by myself :/

Quote:
"You will always be fond of me. I represent to you all the sins you never had the courage to commit.”
Oscar Wilde, The Picture of Dorian Gray
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#16 Old 06-24-2013, 02:07 PM
 
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I get it. At the least a "What do you want to do for your birthday, do you want to go out for dinner/have a certain thing at home for dinner/anything?" or something is not an unreasonable expectation! 

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#17 Old 06-24-2013, 02:16 PM
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Happy belated birthday :)

 

I long ago stopped caring about what I was doing on my birthday and holidays, in terms of it has to be "special."  My perspective is they're just days, and any day can be special or not.  I don't like the disappointment when they don't turn out as hoped for, the expectations, etc.  I really don't celebrate any culturally promoted holiday or event.


"If you want to know where you would have stood on slavery before the civil war, don't look at where you stand on slavery today, look at where you stand on animal rights." - Paul Watson.

 

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#18 Old 06-24-2013, 02:24 PM
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A very belated Happy Birthday to you River (23!  less than half my age .... *faints with jealousy*)

 

There's nothing wrong with wanting one day a year to be 'special' and there's also nothing wrong with being disappointed when that doesn't happen.  I don't make a big deal of birthdays (stopped counting after 30 ...) but I still notice if someone forgets.  Having said that I once forgot my Mum's birthday not long after me and my boys moved house.  I think I ended up feeling worse about it than she did to be honest!

 

A friend of mine was born on 28th December.  When she was younger her family were in the restaurant/pub/hotel trade and (of course) Christmas/New Year is a busy time.  Over the years her parents forgot her birthday TWICE shocked.gif

 

Anyway, many happy returns to you! 

 

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