I hate [inconsiderate] men!!! - Page 2 - VeggieBoards
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#31 Old 02-06-2011, 09:48 AM
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Originally Posted by Carmen View Post

First of all, i want to say i am sorry. not all men are bad and need to be hated. but some of them are, so are some women.
i was very angry and started describing the relationship of my mother and father, one i do not wish to have.
he doesn't wash the dishes not because he is some sort of dr. evil, but because he has some serious skin problems. the skin of his hands gets red and chops when in contact with detergent, cold weather and things like this. so, i cannot tell him to wash dishes, actually i tell him not to because he will suffer after doing that. sometimes when i'm not there he does the dishes because he knows i hate this so much. i have to say he helps me around the house, not as much as i would wish, sometimes when i cook. when i'm on my period he massages my feet up to 10 times a day because it makes me feel better, 2 days ago he went to buy me something to eat and he had a really bad cold. he's pretty much a very nice guy, but of course he does thing that drive me insane.
i really don't know what my problem is. i guess i don't want to end up like my mom, i'm a bit afraid of commitment, and this house doesn't really give me the privacy i need(very small). or maybe instead of being angry at myself for the stupid things i've done lately i just find someone else to be mad at.

I have this too (sort of, it takes a really strong detergent or a few tries with the normal stuff to do this to me), and I just use gloves when I wash dishes. provided the sink isn't *full*, water won't get in the gloves and my hands are fine. I'm allergic to most dyes and perfumes (it seems to get easier as I get older, I no longer have to use test patches for lotions and stuff) and it sounds like he's got what I have. it's some form of eczema and psoriasis, I think.

I can sympathize with the privacy thing, we moved in with his parents because his dad has lyme disease and we wanted to help out, but I get ganged up on constantly and he doesn't think when he does things. like I'll be washing dishes and he'll be eating in the bedroom, but he won't bring his dishes out when he's done even though he has to come out for a cup of coffee anyways, and then he'll heave a sigh (like a girl!) when I ask him where's his dirty dishes. and he washes his dirty, engine grease covered hands in the tub I just spent all morning scrubbing so I have to do it again. or he'll trim his beard and not clean up all the trimmed hair so it's literally all over the bathroom. little aggravating things that I just don't think he thinks about before he does them because his mother never smacked him and told him to cut it out when he was a kid.

I totally feel for you on the lack of privacy. it sucks hope you feel better after venting.

Wake up your generation! Wake up and save the nation! Wake up determination! I am afraid we're going down, Afraid we're going down in flames...
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#32 Old 02-06-2011, 01:16 PM
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If anyone has been in a long term relationship, or married, or lived with their partner then at some point they will have annoyed the frick out of you by doing something like trimming his beard in the sink, or leaving dishes all over the kitchen, and then being a little hurt when you dont feel like having sex that day (yeah because after a day of cleaning makes me feel sooooooo sexy and desireable) but what it comes down to is things like, are they willing to look after you when youre ill & still say you look beautiful when you look your worse, when you are tired and cant be bothered to cook do they step up, are they willing to sit up through the night and hold your hand because they want to support you in the hard times. If not then personally, I could not see the point in being with that person.
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#33 Old 02-06-2011, 01:26 PM
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Originally Posted by .Goth-Alice. View Post

If anyone has been in a long term relationship, or married, or lived with their partner then at some point they will have annoyed the frick out of you by doing something like trimming his beard in the sink, or leaving dishes all over the kitchen, and then being a little hurt when you dont feel like having sex that day (yeah because after a day of cleaning makes me feel sooooooo sexy and desireable) but what it comes down to is things like, are they willing to look after you when youre ill & still say you look beautiful when you look your worse, when you are tired and cant be bothered to cook do they step up, are they willing to sit up through the night and hold your hand because they want to support you in the hard times. If not then personally, I could not see the point in being with that person.

indeed. I wholeheartedly agree with that. I was using my guy's irritating habits as a way to commiserate - all in all, mine's a very good kid (especially considering his age, he's not stupid like most 25 year olds I know...), or I sure as hell wouldn't have spent seven plus years with him.

that said, I still (rather often) miss when we were first dating and I had my own apartment, though. I think every couple should have separate apartments, whether they need breaks from each other or not.

Wake up your generation! Wake up and save the nation! Wake up determination! I am afraid we're going down, Afraid we're going down in flames...
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#34 Old 02-06-2011, 01:40 PM
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See this is something Ive never understood. My friend moved into a flat with her boyfriend and a year later they broke up because they were spending too much time together, in her words 'there was only the living room and bedroom and therefore impossible to get away from each other'.
I live with my guy of 10years. We sleep in the same bed, get up together, have breakfast together, then we go upstairs and work together(both freelance artists) in the same room all day. Then we have lunch together, work more and have dinner together. He goes and plays ps3 for an hour or two after dinner while I read, then we watch tv till bedtime. And we are doing great. Why the need to get away from the one youve chosen to spend your life with?
Im not being rude, just interested in the way people work i guess
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#35 Old 02-06-2011, 01:50 PM
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:shrug: some people need their alone time. I've always been the kind of person who likes to be left alone to read a book. even if someone's absolutely silent, if they're in the room with me, it distracts me everytime they move, and that bothers me. (which is weird, because if it's an animal in the room or if I'm outside, I'm fine. it's just people that bother me.) I've always been like that though, I used to hide in my room as a kid and only come out to eat because my mother would kill me if I didn't eat. I slowly phased that out too, though, in high school, without her noticing.

I spend all day with mine too, unless he's at work. he's just more social, and more... touchy, I guess, than I am. I don't need fifteen hugs just because you came home from work, one will do just fine, so stop touching me. I don't say it, but in my head I'm just standing there thinking 'enough already, I get the point, jeez!'

I'm like this with everyone though, not just him. my cats can touch me all day long, and so can the snake, but for some reason, people just drive me insane and I need my time away from them every so often - and this includes him.

Wake up your generation! Wake up and save the nation! Wake up determination! I am afraid we're going down, Afraid we're going down in flames...
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#36 Old 02-06-2011, 02:11 PM
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yeah, i need my alone time. thats why i don't see myself moving in with a guy who doesn't want a room for himself as well.

even now that i am dating a guy i choose not to meet at every opportunity because i want to spend my quiet time reading, doing my stuff or just sleep
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#37 Old 02-06-2011, 05:33 PM
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Carmen, good to see that you've worked it out!

Chillin' in my blue jeans!
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#38 Old 02-06-2011, 05:36 PM
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it's just people that bother me.

Agreed. XD I also can't stand it when people touch me, and I love being alone. I do admit, I sometimes get lonely... Not for like a boyfriend, but just for friends.

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#39 Old 02-06-2011, 06:17 PM
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I cherish and value my privacy and my alone time. I think I would like most of my time to be alone time and if it isn't, it's because I have CHOSEN to leave the house and socialize, or have CHOSEN to invite people over.
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#40 Old 02-06-2011, 06:17 PM
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However, athough I find it amusing, it's hard to continue having all that much sympathy for women like yourself, because you CHOOSE to date and marry guys like him and then you whinge about it afterwards!:

huge second.

sorry you're going through a rough time, but you control the circumstances in which you put yourself and the people you have contact with. keep that in mind, when choosing to be with him still (or not).
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#41 Old 02-06-2011, 06:35 PM
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I love how this guy made the sudden transformation from a lazy-ass pig who does crap sex that your ****ing sick of cleaning up after, to a really nice guy who often helps around the house without complaining, and even does your shoe laces up for you.

m8itcanw8.com
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#42 Old 02-06-2011, 07:20 PM
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I see your

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gmekN39mnFY

and raise you a

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U6iktQ2y1Rs

Q: How many poets does it take to change a light bulb? A: 1001...one to change the bulb, 1000 to say it's already been done.
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#43 Old 02-07-2011, 12:30 AM
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as i already said i was angry and blew everything out of proportion. yes, having to do the dishes annoyed me and made me angry at him and so i thought about all the things he had done wrong. i even said that he helps me around the house but not as much as i would like him too. but after three years even if he is a saint most of the time i could still find something to reproach.
and as i said before, most of the things said in my first post were about my father.
if i said something while very angry it doesn't mean that it's 100% true. anger makes you say stupid stuff or make them seem worse than they really are.
he is not the perfect man, far from being, but after i calmed down, i saw that he has his good parts, as i have my bad parts. in a relationship there's no good person and bad person(in a normal one at least). the same way i get mad about the dishes maybe he gets mad about the fact that i leave my clothes all around, my cosmetics, my books are lying on the floor, or my moments of laziness when i don't even want to move when he's trying to do something.
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#44 Old 02-07-2011, 01:19 AM
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I love how this guy made the sudden transformation from a lazy-ass pig who does crap sex that your ****ing sick of cleaning up after, to a really nice guy who often helps around the house without complaining, and even does your shoe laces up for you.



Quote:
Originally Posted by Carmen View Post

he is not the perfect man, far from being, but after i calmed down, i saw that he has his good parts, as i have my bad parts. in a relationship there's no good person and bad person(in a normal one at least). the same way i get mad about the dishes maybe he gets mad about the fact that i leave my clothes all around, my cosmetics, my books are lying on the floor, or my moments of laziness when i don't even want to move when he's trying to do something.

Has he been looking over your shoulder when you wrote your subsequent posts?

I'm just messing with you. You gotta have a laugh at this thread. It's a little bit funny.
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#45 Old 02-07-2011, 03:13 AM
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as i already said i was angry and blew everything out of proportion. yes, having to do the dishes annoyed me and made me angry at him and so i thought about all the things he had done wrong. i even said that he helps me around the house but not as much as i would like him too. but after three years even if he is a saint most of the time i could still find something to reproach.
and as i said before, most of the things said in my first post were about my father.
if i said something while very angry it doesn't mean that it's 100% true. anger makes you say stupid stuff or make them seem worse than they really are.
he is not the perfect man, far from being, but after i calmed down, i saw that he has his good parts, as i have my bad parts. in a relationship there's no good person and bad person(in a normal one at least). the same way i get mad about the dishes maybe he gets mad about the fact that i leave my clothes all around, my cosmetics, my books are lying on the floor, or my moments of laziness when i don't even want to move when he's trying to do something.

true that. that happen when one is angry. one often exaggerates the problem. thats why it is a good thing to let it out here instead of hurting him. hope nobody here believes that ones should only be with a perfect guy who never does wrong
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#46 Old 02-07-2011, 05:38 AM
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Originally Posted by Nishani View Post

I love how this guy made the sudden transformation from a lazy-ass pig who does crap sex that your ****ing sick of cleaning up after, to a really nice guy who often helps around the house without complaining, and even does your shoe laces up for you.


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#47 Old 02-07-2011, 06:26 AM
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I learned many years ago that posting when I was highly emotional, especially angry, is something I always regretted doing...oh yeah, and my very regrettable drunkin' posts..lol

I have been living alone for years and love it!

anyway, I did enjoy this thread...thanks!
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#48 Old 02-14-2011, 09:24 AM
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What RB said:
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I just use gloves when I wash dishes.

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#49 Old 02-14-2011, 10:40 AM
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I don't think one man is necessarily representative of all men. Some men can be this way, this is true, but the same can be said for any person, regardless.

I understand that it can be frustrating, to an extreme extent, and for that I am sorry. However, stereotypes just kind of make me sad too.

i disagree. i think that one man is representative of all men.

The Big Bad.
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#50 Old 02-14-2011, 10:44 AM
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i disagree. i think that one man is representative of all men.

I don't think one man is representative of all men, but I think one man always exists who is The Man: an ideal condensation of masculine energy, against which all other men get defined. Of course, I happen to be that man at the present time. Even my belches have a gender, and that is male.

"and I stand

upon a mountain

made of weak and useless men"

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#51 Old 02-14-2011, 10:53 AM
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I don't think one man is representative of all men, but I think one man always exists who is The Man: an ideal condensation of masculine energy, against which all other men get defined. Of course, I happen to be that man at the present time. Even my belches have a gender, and that is male.

Does this also correlate with The Dude??

The Big Bad.
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#52 Old 02-14-2011, 11:31 AM
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.Goth-Alice, said ironically:
Quote:
yeah because after a day of cleaning makes me feel sooooooo sexy and desireable

Truth be told, after spending time on any kind of task or chore, even one as simple as, say, washing my clothes, when I finally get to rest, I feel proud of the results of my effort, and I want to celebrate my accomplishment by doing hot stuff with a hot mama - unless I'm exhausted and fall asleep first.
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#53 Old 02-14-2011, 02:49 PM
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i disagree. i think that one man is representative of all men.

Why?

I believe everything.
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#54 Old 02-14-2011, 02:57 PM
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I think Unovegan was being facetious, he has a habit of doing that. Including all those times he's defended circumcision, I prefer to think

"and I stand

upon a mountain

made of weak and useless men"

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#55 Old 02-14-2011, 03:12 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Carmen View Post

i'm not a lesbian. but sometimes i wish i was.

I wish I was a lesbian sometimes too. Seriously, I don't know how women put up with us, I can barely tolerate my guy friends.

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Originally Posted by Rachel Bonneau View Post

I just use gloves when I wash dishes.

I have latex allergies, so gotta make sure they are vinyl.
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#56 Old 02-14-2011, 04:02 PM
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@the OP, you might want to seriously reevaluate the relationship if your boyfriend's behavior is pissing you off that much. Or, express to him how you feel once you've calmed down from the initial anger.

Quote:
Originally Posted by unovegan View Post

i disagree. i think that one man is representative of all men.

Hey, you're back!
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#57 Old 02-14-2011, 09:58 PM
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I think Unovegan was being facetious, he has a habit of doing that. Including all those times he's defended circumcision, I prefer to think

Oh, I was just getting ready for a big argument with unovegan. I missed him and felt like I should properly welcome him back.

I believe everything.
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#58 Old 02-14-2011, 11:05 PM
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Oh, I was just getting ready for a big argument with unovegan. I missed him and felt like I should properly welcome him back.

Let's roll doll.

The Big Bad.
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#59 Old 02-14-2011, 11:08 PM
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I think Unovegan was being facetious, he has a habit of doing that. Including all those times he's defended circumcision, I prefer to think

Of course. What kind of guy do you think i am??? a primitive ogre?

The Big Bad.
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#60 Old 02-15-2011, 09:06 AM
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Of course. What kind of guy do you think i am??? a primitive ogre?

Oh, so now what do you have against primitive ogres?

I believe everything.
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