Hello all!



Quick question regarding how one would go about dating a hunter...



I have seem to fallen for a guy who loves this 'outdoor activity' and am willing too look past it for now... he has not been on any trip since I started seeing him, him and his father usually go. What can I expect from this? Has anyone been in this situation before or has any advice about how to deal with it?



Also his parents do not know i am vegan and wonder how that will go over.



Thanks in advance <3

I was worried what my girlfriend's parents would think about my veganism (they are very strict, traditional, cambodian) but it went over fine. they were really cool about it as for the hunting, i have never had to deal with that.

It may be something he is willing to give up because of your feelings about it. It is also possible his Dad might resent you for stealing his hunting partner.. but if he is mature hopefully there wouldn't be any animosity. If you would feel more comfortable you could have your boyfriend tell his parents that you are Vegan before it comes up in conversation, that way he can sort of do damage control.. you know don't tease her by asking her if she wants to eat this or that, don't pull out any stuffed dead animals and he could inform them on what you do not and will not eat. It might be easier that way. Or you can let them know yourself and field any questions they have. It's worth a go. Who knows your compassion might rub off on them

I'd rather date a hunter who goes out into the wild to take their food from nature, eating what they kill and treating the animals with respect, than someone who's ignorant and in denial about what they're eating.



So many people just think meat is something you buy frozen in a shop, and those are the people who I call hypocrites, people who couldn't kill an animal but still think it's ok to eat meat that's come from a battery farm. I actually have quite a lot of respect for people who go out and hunt for their food. Obviously it's not something I would do. They've asked themselves the same questions as me, but answered differently, which is a lot better than not questioning at all.

I know Ive said this before, but not recently. Someone who kills what they eat is certainly not in denial about where their food comes from, as some meat-eaters are- as I was once in fact. But this isnt necessarily better for the animals concerned. My immediate family (parents, sisters) didnt hunt, but we did fish and we sometimes ate the fishes we caught. Im fairly sure this was the main reason why I ate fish for about 4 years after I stopped eating meat.



To the original poster: its up to you whether or not you can have a relationship with a hunter.

There is no possible way I could ever stand to date someone that chooses to murder animals. In fact when I find out someone is a hunter, I can't help but lower my respect of them.

I would date a hunter. It is one of the more acceptable forms of animal consumption for me - small scale, methodology taken seriously (by some, anyway...), resourceful, and not deliberately cruel (except for the taking of life, which I will give omnivores).



Now if it was a seal clubber or something, that'd be different. But a gun/bow deer hunter? Sure. Most deer hunters I know only take a shot if they have a clean kill, and if by some chance they wound a deer they will track it as long as they have to to bring it down and not leave it to suffer a lingering death.



It would all depend on their attitude towards other creatures, though. If they were what I considered a "respectful" hunter that was into wildlife conservation and using all parts of his kill, that would be one thing. But if he was one of these guys that say things like, "Animals don't feel pain the same way we do, so it doesn't hurt them for us to kill them," or something similar, that would be a dealbreaker for me.



Not because I don't date hunters, but because I don't date idiots.

That someone hunts doesn't at all mean they've questioned meat-eating or factory farming or animal consumption in general and answered some difficult questions. They can simply be just as socially conditioned to hunt, as your average omni is socially conditioned to buy meat from the store, no thinking involved.



Besides, quite many hunters buy meat from the store in addition to hunting, they're not mutually exclusive.

Could you date someone who eats meat from the store? Those are also murdered animals. I wouldn't date a meat eater, but if i did i'd rather it be someone who knows/does exactly what it takes to kill/skin/use all the parts of that animal.

Trade the word "deer" for the word "dog." Would a person who shoots and wounds a dog, yet spends several hours tracking it down to finish it off, also be worthy of praise?

If they were going to eat it.



And I'm not "praising" the practice, just saying to me it is (relatively) more justifiable than supporting Big Farm.

He goes out, kills animals, and probably guts them himself.



Mention that this bothers you, and if he doesn't stop, then dump his ass. Anyone who kills animals for fun while tons of meat gets thrown out of supermarkets everyday is not a compassionate, environmentally aware, and kind individual. That's just my opinion.

Between the two evils, wouldn't it be better to date someone who doesn't support all the additional crap of meat in markets? That's assuming he's using the meat for consumption.

While that may be true, I question the heart of someone who can see a living being and shoot it dead, take pictures, then gut it....omnivores who buy meat are usually ignorant of the process, and I think if they were able to see the whole process and made to kill it themselves you would see a lot more vegetarians.

I would much rather date someone who could at least potentially have compassion for animals and is just ignorant and conditioned to detach the steak from the animal, than someone who is not detached and knows exactly what he's doing to those animals, and still decides and continues to do it.



I was an omni once, you know -- many of us were. How many of us were hunters? How many of us could have been hunters? Not me. Maybe there's a reason for that...

interesting point. But, what about people such as Native Americans who feel very strong spritual ties to hunting animals? would you date one of them there folk?

No. I don't think a spiritual connection to nature is much of a consolation for the victims.

Oh yes, because everyone knows its so much better to embrace wanton killers than unenlightened hypocrites.

Since when is it respectful to go into someone's home and kill them?






Animals have familial and social ties, as we do. It's not only about the specific animal who is being killed. We don't know everything about their relationships and communication, as we have seen them only as resources, not individuals. What if a mother with a young fawn is killed? On the arc of evolution, why do we assume that we're the only ones with emotions for our kind or others?



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they're not unfeeling machines.

I live in a state full of hunters, and let me tell you I've never met a hunter who will turn down hot dogs off the grill or a steakhouse dinner because the animal didn't live a free life. Hunters who refuse all meat except what they've hunted are like omnis who eat exclusively locally-raised organic--they exist, but they are rare creatures indeed. Those who hunt cause suffering to not only the factory-farm animals, but also those animals they kill.



I'll make the argument that the idea of a humane, clean kill everytime is a myth, too. Hunters can say whatever they like once they're out of the woods and the animals are already dead. The majority of the nonhunting public never see actual kills in action. I would suggest visiting Youtube and searching for hunting videos. There exist possibly hundreds of videos showing animals being shot, hounded by hunting dogs, and even being wounded and escaping. It's not "bang you're dead." The pain and distress of the animals is evident. And remember, this is what hunters have chosen to show us of the "sport."

My OH is an omnivore but he would never kill an animal for sport. It's hypocritical in a way but I couldn't date someone who was a hunter personally. I would find it horrifying if they had a hobby of killing innocent animals.

I don't think it's hypocritical. Your husband might just be disconnected from the killing process, and he might still have enough compassion to stop eating meat (and preferably other animal products) if he was exposed to the visceral reality of the sounds, smells and sight of abuse and killing.



Hunters, on the other hand, are already exposed to the suffering and death of the animals they kill, so the only room there is for them growing up ethically is that their values, beliefs or personality changes, and that's a much more challenging and unlikely process. Although, one should never give up on anyone -- even some hunters have become AR activists.

I think that is true, there is a psychological disconnect in many omni's minds about the live animal and the meat that they buy in little packages at the supermarket. My OH actually flat out refused to watch Meet your Meat for that reason.

Yeah, on the one hand it can very annoying that omnis like to put hands on their ears and say "la la la la la" whenever anyone would like to bring up the consequences of their dietary choices, but the good thing about that is that they might react like that because deep within them is some concern for the treatment of animals, and they are trying to prevent that concern from taking control and forcing them to change their lifestyle.



If they were always willing to watch any clip, because they know they will be completely unaffected by it, that would be worse. It would be closer to the hunters' mindset.

I am glad that I don't know any people like that. It disturbs me that some people can shut off any compassion towards animals. (That lalalala fingers in the ear thing of most omnis does get a bit old though.)

Irizary: hammer, nail, BANG.



I think I understand how someone might look at animals as a renewable resource instead of as sentient individuals- although I don't see them this way. But I don't understand what a hunter means when he (or she) uses the word "respect" as applied to an animal.

Agreed.



--Fromper

Yup. I used to hunt, fish, euthanize, etc...you never know what is going to change someone's mind.

My bf hunts. Well he used to, he hasn't been in a few years - he doesn't like it, but his dad does.



I'm sure we'll fight if his dad pressures him into going. He eats what I cook so is vegan for the most part, unless we go out or he makes his own lunch.



Because he hasn't done it while I've been with him it hasn't been an issue. I think hes a little brain washed about how its "good" for the deer because otherwise they would starve. However I've outdebated him on that topic and he basically agreed and said he didn't want to anyway. He also at least takes issue with the way factory farmed animals are treated (though has no plan on giving up meat - just eventually buying from locally non factory farmed farmers (money is an issue right now). Its a small start I guess? ;|



Also, I think that the majority of his family takes issue with me for being a vegan. I can't eat what they eat and "bond" over it, so at the very least they're annoyed. But I'm not dating them, so I deal, though I try to get along (I made them vegan cupcakes one time). =-)



Anyway, not sure I'd be able to date him if he liked to kill animals. I'm friends with some hunters, but not sure I could date an active hunter, unless it was his only source of meat (which I consider less cruel than factory farmed meat).

Lots of folks on here seem to think that most people are unenlightened hypocrites. I've known many meat eaters that don't hunt but are very well aware of their choices. So, in this case are these aware store bought meat eaters still better than a hunter who eats what he kills? People seem to think that most people just need to be brought to their senses. There are definitely folks up that vein, but many are aware and still make the meat eating choice.