I woke up this morning to hear that I have one hour till our (mine and my fiance's) cat Berlin has to be put to sleep. I would be holding him right now but my uncontrolable sobbing is just upsetting him.
I've never been put into this position before. Any pets that I've had that passed away all passed away when I was too young to really become fully attached to them. I've also never had know know almost exactly how much longer that they were going to be alive. My parents either took them to the vet in secret or they slipped away into the night while I was asleep.
I didn't think I'd take this so hard...Berlin is old, he's partially blind, he can barely walk...I knew this was coming but right now I'm bawling and I can't stop. I don't cry infront of people but I can't even hold it in right now...I feel so silly because he's my fiance's cat and I've only known him for 3 years but I just want to hold him tight and say "No, I'm not ready, don't take him away from me yet!"
(the following was added later to give you guys more info on why this is happening)
In the past 3 weeks he's been having seizures every 3-5 days or so, he had couple strokes and last night he had the stroke that just clinched it. We all were holding out as long as possible until we knew Berlin just was having any fun anymore and he stopped being a happy cat lastnight. His back leg stopped working because of a blood clot, he couldn't stand the light anymore, and he soiled himself this morning. That's just not the quality of life any of us want for him and even though I'm not ready I can't make him live like that.
I have to go now . . .