Everything I know I learned from my cat! (the cat appreciation thread) - VeggieBoards
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#1 Old 02-07-2005, 12:24 PM
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Cats are our masters. They need to be idolized as often as possible. This is what I've learned from being a slave to two felines:



1. Eat small amounts of food throughout the day. Don't overdo it.



2. Get plenty of rest. Several naps throughout the day are necessary to conserve energy.



3. Clean yourself often, and not just after meals. Even your tail needs a good washin' every day.



4. Ignore what's on the television screen and instead focus on the real life dramas going on outside your window. Focus as long as possible.



5. Get your water from the faucet.



6. No time is ever the wrong time to play. Get up in the middle of the night to play if you feel like it.



7. If you give love, you will get love in return.



8. Sometimes you don't get love in return, so you have to demand it. LOUDLY.



9. The vacuum cleaner is a frightening monster. Avoid it.



10. If your toilet is dirty, simply don't use it. Go elsewhere. That'll learn 'em.



11. Breakfast time is 5:45 a.m. SHARP. Always be ready for it. Remind the necessary person not to be late with it.



more to follow...

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#2 Old 02-07-2005, 02:09 PM
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The world is a fun place filled with toys. Piece of paper=toy. Plastic bag=toy. Catnip mouse=toy. Own poop=stinky toy! With so many toys how can you not be having fun?
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#3 Old 02-07-2005, 02:21 PM
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And don't forget... Cats are like chips - you can never have just one! I am owned by FIVE! ...(and all are spayed and neutered of course)
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#4 Old 02-07-2005, 02:44 PM
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continuing...



12. Pillows make nice beds. If somebody's head is on it, stretch out completely to make the head move down a little and give you more room.



13. Store bought toys are boring and should be ignored. Sparkly ribbons are much more fun to play with, especially when they're tied around things.



14. Cardboard boxes are fun to climb into, the smaller the better. Shoeboxes are best.



15. Kitchen countertops often contain infintessimal amounts of interesting-smelling things, hopefully edible, that require investigation.



16. Bugs taste terrible, but since they move, catch 'em and eat 'em anyway.



17. Pretend you want to go out. Then, when you ARE out, say you're just kidding and run back in.



more to come...

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#5 Old 02-07-2005, 03:06 PM
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Amy SF - These are great! You should make a poster.
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#6 Old 02-08-2005, 12:39 PM
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continuing...



18. The perfect napping or hiding spot under the bed should be just one inch beyond the reach of the average human arm.



19. Closets make wonderful play areas. The pretty pieces of cloth hanging all over the place are perfect for leaping around on. Be sure to dig one's claws in for firm support.



20. Hairballs are embarrassing. It's a good idea to put them where they won't be seen.



21. Snacks are nice to have all day long. Don't accept only one.



more later...

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#7 Old 02-11-2005, 04:27 PM
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LOL those are perfect
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#8 Old 02-11-2005, 05:06 PM
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Wow, great thread. I love cats so much, they make the best pets.
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#9 Old 02-11-2005, 05:08 PM
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VB'ers are invited to post their own items while I think of more.

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#10 Old 02-11-2005, 05:34 PM
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Another comfortable place is on the chest of someone between the face and the book they are reading.
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#11 Old 02-11-2005, 05:41 PM
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22. Aloofness is just a cover for "thinking about what to do next".



23. I don't "do drugs". Where's the catnip?



24. Newspaper makes nice, warm, soft, comfy material for snuggling. Same with books and magazines. Ignore complaints you might hear. You have a right to stretch out.



25. If you didn't want me to munch on your new plant, why did you bring it home?



26. When you see the human approaching carrying that funny looking box with the towels, toys and snacks inside it, run for your life.

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#12 Old 02-13-2005, 11:34 PM
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26. Make sure you are always on top of you homework.



27. Tread carefully into unknown places.



28. Fear pain, but understand death.



29. Only speak to those willing to listen.



30. Always make yourself comfortable no matter what or where you sit, lay, or sleep.



31. If the food you cook offends your or some one else's nose - cover it up.



32. No matter if you are poor or rich in life - always keep your head up.



33. Always stay close to loved ones... Just not too close - unless they are sleeping.



34. Fresh running water is always better than day old stale water.



35. When going about your life, and come accross a problem you think you can not handle, don't just look straight ahead, instead, look in all directions and maybe you will hurdle the obstacle to get where you need to be.
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#13 Old 02-14-2005, 09:57 AM
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36. If you're craving attention, don't be shy about letting someone know...even if it means sprawling across the newspaper that they're reading.
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#14 Old 02-14-2005, 10:35 AM
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37. If you smell something on the carpet that doesnt appeal to you then try to bury it.
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#15 Old 02-14-2005, 01:34 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Amy SF View Post




20. Hairballs are embarrassing. It's a good idea to put them where they won't be seen.







Shoes come highly recommended. Along with the spot your person(s) will land their feet when they arise from the bed in the a.m.



What a therapeutic thread.
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