Pornography as an addiction - VeggieBoards
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#1 Old 01-29-2005, 04:49 AM
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Saturday November 8, 2003

The Guardian



There's an episode of Friends - The One With The Free Porn - in which Chandler and Joey discover they have tuned into a porn channel. And it's free. They leave the TV on, afraid switching off will mean no more pornography. By the end of the episode, Chandler is seeing the world through porn-tinted spectacles. "I was just at the bank," he complains, "and the teller didn't ask me to go do it with her in the vault." Joey, bewildered, reports a similar reaction from the pizza-delivery girl. "You know what," decides Chandler, "we have to turn off the porn."



As a society, however, we are further from turning off the porn than we have ever been. Pornography is everywhere - it masquerades as "gentlemen's entertainment" in the form of clubs such as Spearmint Rhino, it infiltrates advertising and it will soon be available in our back pockets, thanks to a deal by adult entertainment giant Private Media Group to beam porn to UK mobile phones.



In its hardcore form, pornography is now accessed in the UK by an estimated 33% of all internet users. Since the British Board of Film Classification relaxed its guidelines in 2000, hardcore video pornography now makes up between 13% and 17% of censors' viewing, compared with just 1% three years ago, a rate of growth that is being cited as a causal factor in the recent bankruptcy of Penthouse, at one time the very apotheosis of porno chic but in recent years little more risqué than Loaded. In the US, with the pornography industry bringing in up to $15bn (£8.9bn) annually, people spend more on porn every year than they do on movie tickets and all the performing arts combined. Each year, in Los Angeles alone, more than 10,000 hardcore pornographic films are made, against an annual Hollywood average of just 400 movies.



Pornography is not only bigger business than ever before, it is also more acceptable, more fashionable, more of a statement of cool. From pieces "in praise of porn" in the normally sober Prospect magazine, to such programmes as Pornography: The Musical on Channel 4 last month, to Victoria Coren and Charlie Skelton's book, published last year, about making a porn film, to the news that Val Kilmer is to play the part of pornography actor John Holmes in a new mainstream movie, there is a widespread sense that anyone who suggests pornography might have any kind of adverse effect is laughably out of touch. Coren and Skelton, former Erotic Review film critics, focus on their flip comic narrative, scarcely troubling themselves with any deeper issues. "In all our years of watching porn," they write, in a rare moment of analysis that doesn't get developed any further, "we have never properly resolved what we think about how, why and whether it is degrading to women. We suspect that it might be. We suspect that pornography might be degrading to everybody."





For the rest of the article;



http://www.guardian.co.uk/weekend/st...079016,00.html

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#2 Old 01-29-2005, 05:46 AM
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How very very sad. RL women just can't compete w/ perrenially youthful, perfect women who never say no, love gang bangs, being raped, double penetration, & anything else degrading & sadistic.

I don't get women who say this sh:t turns them on, they enjoy it w/ their partners, etc.

My bf is a big fan of this & it greatly disturbs me but there is nothing I can do. Of all the men I have known closely in my life, there is only *one* I know who was not hooked on porn. I'm including male friends, bf's, my Dad & my 4 brothers. So if I dump bf I'll probably have to be alone forever or settle for someone else who wants to whack off w/ pix/movies.

I think it's a disgusting addiction that is getting worse & worse.
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#3 Old 01-29-2005, 06:37 AM
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How very very sad. RL women just can't compete w/ perrenially youthful, perfect women who never say no, love gang bangs, being raped, double penetration, & anything else degrading & sadistic.



I don't think you have to. The article didn't say that people are leaving their partners to seek out porn stars as mates.



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My bf is a big fan of this & it greatly disturbs me but there is nothing I can do.



You can leave your bf.



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Of all the men I have known closely in my life, there is only *one* I know who was not hooked on porn. I'm including male friends, bf's, my Dad & my 4 brothers.



There are several billion men on the planet and hundreds of millions of men in the continental United States.



Your father, brothers, boyfriends, and friends may not be respresentative samples of all men.





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So if I dump bf I'll probably have to be alone forever or settle for someone else who wants to whack off w/ pix/movies.



One of those possibilities is definately going to happen to you unless you look for someone else and you will not have the motivation to do that until you change your beliefs about men.



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I think it's a disgusting addiction that is getting worse & worse.



I agree.

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#4 Old 01-29-2005, 06:39 AM
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I am relieved to hear a man say he hates porn. I was beginning to lose all hope.
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#5 Old 01-29-2005, 06:52 AM
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I am relieved to hear a man say he hates porn. I was beginning to lose all hope.



I didn't write that I hated porn.



One thing you always read in obscenity debates is that it is next to impossible to defince "obscenity". One person's porn, is another person's erotica.



I have seen burlesque shows ( real burlesque, not poll dancing, stripping etc ) , read erotic stories, seen pictures of nude women, seen pictures of women dressed provactively and I have enjoyed them.



There are people who would call that pornography, obscene, and/or degrading.



On the other hand you will not find me in a strip club, an "adult" book store or in the "adult section" of a video store. Speaking only for my own tastes, I find those things to be degrading, and worse.......dull.



After reading a recommendation made by a woman on VB for the Suicide Girls site I have checking that site out a few times. Some people would ( & have ) called that site exploitative and pornographic. I probably wouldn't be looking at that site if I had a sexual relationship with a woman.........I wouln't need to.



I posted the article because I find it surprising that people with relationships still use porn.......that it has morphed beyond being a means to get off in lonely times into being an addiction as an end in itself.

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#6 Old 01-29-2005, 07:13 AM
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.....I find it surprising that people with relationships still use porn...



This is kind of relevant (although only about one gender)..... but I read once that the woman a guy is with is the woman he GETS to have sex with, while the woman/en pinned up on his wall (or in his videos) is the woman he WANTS to have sex with.



I know.... major generalisation; I believe it about many guys I know (based on personal experience when talking to them), but I'd never say most/all guys are like that.



MOD NOTE: edited for content
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#7 Old 01-29-2005, 07:44 AM
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I know.... major generalisation; I believe it about many guys I know (based on personal experience when talking to them), but I'd never say most/all guys are like that.



An important point.



When I with a woman she is the only woman I want to be with.

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#8 Old 01-29-2005, 09:35 AM
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Porn is no worse than golf or hanging out on VB too much.



Hmm.. actually I'd rather date a guy who was into porn over golf. Being with a golf fan can be difficult. Especially when you're the one with the Golf channel and he wants you to bring the TV into the dining room so he can watch it during dinner.
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#9 Old 01-29-2005, 10:56 AM
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In the field of psychology, many cases of "nymphomania" or "pr0n addiction" are simply cases of individuals who have higher sex-drives than the therapists. That beings said, it is possible to become "addicted" to almost anything that is pleasant.



I dunno. I have ambivalant feelings about porn, overall...



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#10 Old 01-29-2005, 12:40 PM
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I like porn, if it is sufficiently erotic. Most of it is low budget crap, however, and tends to be a huge turnoff (for example, watching a woman moan, then hearing it two seconds later because the "moan track" is dubbed in badly, or hearing the guy grunting away while his mouth never moves - ventriloquist sex? ). I wish someone would make porn that was more like the sex scenes in R rated movies, steamy, seductive, and erotic.



As for porn addiction, can't say that I've ever experienced it. I also would never want to date a porn actress, just for the record. No matter how good they look on tape, I can't help but think, "Ewww, disease."







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#11 Old 01-29-2005, 01:39 PM
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Originally Posted by organica View Post

How very very sad. RL women just can't compete w/ perrenially youthful, perfect women who never say no, love gang bangs, being raped, double penetration, & anything else degrading & sadistic.

I don't get women who say this sh:t turns them on, they enjoy it w/ their partners, etc.

My bf is a big fan of this & it greatly disturbs me but there is nothing I can do. Of all the men I have known closely in my life, there is only *one* I know who was not hooked on porn. I'm including male friends, bf's, my Dad & my 4 brothers. So if I dump bf I'll probably have to be alone forever or settle for someone else who wants to whack off w/ pix/movies.

I think it's a disgusting addiction that is getting worse & worse.



Your view of men is extremely troubling. Furthermore, your emotional dependence to men who don't make you happy is equally troubling. You need help.
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#12 Old 01-29-2005, 01:58 PM
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Your view of men is extremely troubling. Furthermore, your emotional dependence to men who don't make you happy is equally troubling. You need help.



But krista, I'm going on empirical evidence in my own life, not imagining things!!

What am I supposed to think?

Are you telling me it is someone *besides* men that is making porn the multibillion doallar industry it is, or that porn is *not* a multibillion dollar industry?
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#13 Old 01-29-2005, 02:06 PM
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My dear, there are droves of women who run and direct porn. Not to mention all the women who voluntarily act in them.
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#14 Old 01-29-2005, 02:12 PM
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My dear, there are droves of women who run and direct porn. Not to mention all the women who voluntarily act in them.



But I doubt they'd be doing it if *somebody* wasn't buying it.

Are you suggesting that the buyers of porn are largely, or even half, female?
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#15 Old 01-29-2005, 02:20 PM
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No, I am saying that not every man on the face of the earth is into porn. Most men would rather have a real live breathing person in bed, and a good football game on the screen.



Raise your expectations. Watch that stereotyping. You limit your own future with your lack of belief in your ability to attract better. Believe in yourself. Get good enough in bed to curl his toes. If that doesn't stop the porn, find another man who will appreciate your skills.
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#16 Old 01-29-2005, 02:31 PM
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Originally Posted by Kurmudgeon View Post

This is kind of relevant (although only about one gender)..... but I read once that the woman a guy is with is the woman he GETS to f**k, while the woman/en pinned up on his wall (or in his videos) is the woman he WANTS to f**k.



I know.... major generalisation; I believe it about many guys I know (based on personal experience when talking to them), but I'd never say most/all guys are like that.



I would say that most men feel this way from time to time, but only a few do all the time. Sometimes we are very happy with our partners, sometimes dissatisfied. I would imagine that women are the same way with us.



Really, I think it is the insecurity of the opposite sex that leads to these "All men are pigs" and "all women are whores" kinds of generalizations. Sure, all men ARE pigs and all women ARE whores, only it's just from time to time. (And personally, I like being in pig mode sometimes; I definitely like it when my S/O is in whore mode ).



Life is messy, and there are few hard and fast rules pertaining to every member of a gender. Personally, I think we would all be better off dropping the generalizations and accepting that most people are wrong for us, and a few are very very right, and going at life from that POV.



My 2¢







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#17 Old 01-29-2005, 02:52 PM
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But I doubt they'd be doing it if *somebody* wasn't buying it.

Are you suggesting that the buyers of porn are largely, or even half, female?



At least half, at least books and movies.



I don't know a woman between the ages of 20-40 that hasn't watched or read 1 erotic (ie porn) movie/book.
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#18 Old 01-29-2005, 02:53 PM
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No, I am saying that not every man on the face of the earth is into porn. Most men would rather have a real live breathing person in bed, and a good football game on the screen.



Mine would rather a real person and unltd access to online games
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#19 Old 01-29-2005, 03:35 PM
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I don't know a woman between the ages of 20-40 that hasn't watched or read 1 erotic (ie porn) movie/book.









I haven't. I'm just not interested.
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#20 Old 01-29-2005, 03:41 PM
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I really think that there are some women (men too I assume) out there that really could use watching some porn. It actually will help those who do not know how to make love correctly or perfom sexual acts the right way.
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#21 Old 01-29-2005, 03:47 PM
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ok
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#22 Old 01-29-2005, 04:35 PM
 
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I really think that there are some women (men too I assume) out there that really could use watching some porn. It actually will help those who do not know how to make love correctly or perfom sexual acts the right way.



Yeah, because someone's sure to improve their sexual technique from the glorious examples set forth in porn films.



Gimme a break.

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#23 Old 01-29-2005, 04:37 PM
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I've gotten some fun ideas from porn.. but I like to try out different things now and then.
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#24 Old 01-29-2005, 04:39 PM
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I haven't. I'm just not interested.



But I don't know you
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#25 Old 01-29-2005, 04:45 PM
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Yeah, because someone's sure to improve their sexual technique from the glorious examples set forth in porn films.



Gimme a break.



I think they can. I am not talking about anything outrageous. Seriously, the gals who performed the best that I have been with either watched porn or watch it regularly. They do not have stupid hang ups about sexual acts.



I agree with Marie, they can provide for some good ideas. Sex is not something to be uptight about.
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#26 Old 01-29-2005, 04:52 PM
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Yeah, because someone's sure to improve their sexual technique from the glorious examples set forth in porn films.





Hey now. If you wanted to learn how to seduce the plumber, you could learn how to do that by watching a porn
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#27 Old 01-29-2005, 05:23 PM
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Wouldn't sexual technique videos/DVDs be more ideal for that, FR?
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#28 Old 01-29-2005, 06:05 PM
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Wouldn't sexual technique videos/DVDs be more ideal for that, FR?



Maybe. I haven't seen any of those. As long as they get down to business, then yes.
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#29 Old 01-29-2005, 06:31 PM
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Porn is no worse than golf or hanging out on VB too much.



Golf will not make you grow hair on your palms.

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#30 Old 01-29-2005, 06:42 PM
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Are you saying that hanging out on VB will?
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