Friends mom is abusive to puppy - VeggieBoards
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#1 Old 06-02-2012, 09:33 PM
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So i was going to put this in the "stupid things omnivores say" thread, but i think it deserves its own thread to talk about it, i wasn't sure where exactly to put it but i think it might just fit here just because generally the compost heap is the place you come to be pissed off lol. I went to visit my friend and her new baby and they had gotten a puppy as well, they let him inside and the mom of my friend was "playing with him" at first it was all normal he's a very hyper and playful puppy as i would expect if i had a puppy.

 

She was giving him a rope toy and playing with him, and as puppies naturally freaking do he barked some, and play bit her. She freaks the hell out, muzzles him with her hands calls him an ******* and tries to get him to stop, she keeps doing this as he's naturally playing and doing what freaking dogs do, not hurting her of course because it's just play biting and his teeth aren't even that sharp, at one point she took him and swung him over to one side mad and muzzled him, said "i put one dog down i can put down you too" i wanted to ****ing kill her.

 

She only freaked out when he play bit her, not when he was trying to jump up and get the baby that was on my moms lap, if anything that's the time to get mad, but even then obviously it's just a puppy that doesn't know better. This makes me wonder if maybe her husband and daughter being (recovering) drug addicts has something to do with her. If you treat a puppy that way, something who is even more innocent and unknowing than a kid, how the hell did she treat her daughter when she was little? And how will she treat her grandson when he does something 'wrong'.

 

I feel like i haven't even fully explained the extent to what she did, i can't put it into words how it made me feel, i was in shock, i immediately wanted the puppy out of her care and hated this woman to the core. I don't feel there's any way i can get involved and i don't even think any animal place would take it serious enough, because so far she hasn't beat the **** out of him i guess it's "okay". This dog will probably turn on her or someone else one day and be put down and it's all her fault, i just hope if he does, it's her he turns on, and not the baby or another innocent person. Am i over reacting or would you hate her too?

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#2 Old 06-03-2012, 03:19 AM
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She sounds like a horrible person.

I don't have a dog but from what I have read even if the dog is a puppy you should not let them bite. HOWEVER what that woman is doing is not only cruel but from what I have read the completely wrong way to discourage biting. According to what I have read, if the puppy bites during play you should turn around and ignore him or her for a few minutes, the puppy should soon get the picture that biting= end of playtime and should stop.

Maybe if you see her again you could mention something about this. Maybe bring it up in the context of the baby- like ask them how they are training the puppy to stop biting, since this is important with the baby around, and explaining how yelling or hitting or shaking the puppy is likely to make him or her more aggressive?

I understand your frustrations, it must have been horrible to watch. I don't understand why they got a puppy when they have a baby anyway? Puppies need a lot of time and attention and the best time to give them this is not when there's a baby around that needs even more time and attention... Not really fair on the dog or baby. Would be totally different if they already had a dog then got pregnant, just seems to me like the worst possible time to get a dog when you have a very young child...
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#3 Old 06-03-2012, 03:22 AM
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What happens at the lower end of the scale when animals, then children, become lifestyle accessories.

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#4 Old 06-03-2012, 09:04 AM
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Echoing already expressed thoughts: it was damned stupid behaviour. Also damned stupid to get a puppy when you've got a baby at the same time as puppies need a lot of time and care, neither of which it seems this woman possesses. If she's physically hard and unkind with her small animals, I'd be concerned about her behaviour with small children too, as there is a proven relationship between animal and child cruelty. It's horrible when you know crappy people are doing crappy things to innocent animals and children, but it's not 'serious' enough that you can take action.


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#5 Old 06-03-2012, 04:19 PM
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So she wound the puppy up, he played the way he would with a littermate, and then she got mad. You are not overreacting. She is a moron.

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#6 Old 06-03-2012, 05:26 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AlixJ18 View Post
I don't feel there's any way i can get involved

Why not?

 

It's the mom of your friend.  How does your friend feel about animal care?

 

I would get involved, even if it ultimately ends the relationship.  In fact, at one point I did end my relationship with my best friend over a fight about animal treatment.


"If you want to know where you would have stood on slavery before the civil war, don't look at where you stand on slavery today, look at where you stand on animal rights." - Paul Watson.

 

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#7 Old 06-03-2012, 05:48 PM
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They all seemed to think it was normal, not sure how i could help, it would just be drama, i don't see anything good coming of it.

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#8 Old 06-03-2012, 06:36 PM
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Is it possible you could say something like -

 

"this is really awkward to talk about...but I'm concerned about the way that the puppy is being trained...and it seems to me that you are likely to have behavior problems down the road..."

 

and then talk to her about what you saw and help her understand how ineffective - you don't even have to say cruel - the treatment is.

 

It does not seem o.k. to say nothing.


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#9 Old 06-03-2012, 06:49 PM
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This is how I make the decision to act in this kind of situation:

 

If you were the puppy - vulnerable and dependent - what would you hope, expect, want a bystander such as yourself to do in this situation?


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#10 Old 06-04-2012, 05:21 PM
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That dog is going to end up being a fear/defensive biter. Any dog trainer can tell you that.


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#11 Old 06-04-2012, 06:34 PM
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And then mom and grandma are going to wonder why it bit the child down the road. It needs to be rehomed.

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#12 Old 06-05-2012, 07:35 AM
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I agree with you completely. It's just a puppy, like you said. It doesn't know any better.

There's a new puppy that my neighbors just got. But they are gone a lot, and he needs someone to play with. They just leave him outside to wander when they're gone, and he usually makes his way over to my yard. I've been running around with him and playing fetch with him. I can't stand to see animals mistreated either.

Maybe you could talk to her about it. The worst thing she can do is say she doesn't see a problem.


"Ugliness, if given a powerful voice, can be beautiful."

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